Hell...

[amstalder 0]

According to Google, this has been around for quite some time. However, I just saw it tonight and wanted to share

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HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :


Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'


THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

[Amazon 7]

Quote

According to Google, this has been around for quite some time. However, I just saw it tonight and wanted to share

Quote

HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT

The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.

The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :


Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'


THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.

I see this going to the dark nether regions in

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[gonzalesna 0]

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I see this going to the dark nether regions in

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Oh no! Not the dark nether regions!

Some people refrain from beating a dead horse. Personally, I find a myriad of entertainment value when beating it until it becomes a horse-smoothie.

[MikeJD 0]

Nice.

I'd bet a lot of money that wasn't actually submitted as an exam answer - that's just the kind of colour people like to add before sending these things out into the world - but it's still cute and funny.

[Krip 2]

To OP

I see this going to the dark nether regions in

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2




1

Oh no! Not the dark nether regions!

No way no how as long as #2 is On DZ.com I'm sure your safe here. Your a cupcake compared to him.

I've been banned from the dark nether region per my request and don't miss it one bit.

OTOH people tell me to go to hell all the time. I'm sure I'm not going to hell when it time to check out I'm going into the freezer. In my basement.

Getting banned from DZ. is possible as #2 is around.

One Jump Wonder

[quade 3]

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Nice.

I'd bet a lot of money that wasn't actually submitted as an exam answer - that's just the kind of colour people like to add before sending these things out into the world - but it's still cute and funny.

It's is an extraordinarily old joke.

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[amstalder 0]

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Nice.

I'd bet a lot of money that wasn't actually submitted as an exam answer - that's just the kind of colour people like to add before sending these things out into the world - but it's still cute and funny.

It's is an extraordinarily old joke.

Yeah, I googled it before I posted... Definitely not a legit question/answer, and apparently it first surfaced in the mid-90s. The science nerd in me was still entertained by it, though.

[JohnMitchell 14]

I liked it.
Ever hear the one about the physics exam question "How do you measure the height of a building with a mercury barometer".

One student answered "Take the glass tube with the markings and use it to measure the building."

Of course, it was graded as incorrect, but the student protested. The instructor gave him a retake on the question. His next answer was to go to the superintendent of the building and say "Sir, I have a very nice barometer I will give to you if you tell me the height of this building,"

The instructor gave him another try, saying "Give me an answer using physics". So the student wrote of dropping it off the top of the building and timing the fall until impact, then using D=1/2 AT2 to figure the height of the building. The instructor insisted this was the wrong answer again, but the student insisted he used physics. The student finally relented that you could measure the change in air pressure from the ground floor to the roof and calculate the height, of course.

No real punchline, just an illustration of the fact that there are many "right" answers in this world,, not just the ones we expect.

[npgraphicdesign 2]

"....ain't a bad place to be." - Angus & Malcolm Young and Bon Scott.

[amstalder 0]

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No real punchline, just an illustration of the fact that there are many "right" answers in this world,, not just the ones we expect.

Very true

[Coreece 190]

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1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell,then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over

It shows that God has made foolish the wisdom of the World....It's all right there in scripture, if you've even bothered to read....

Your secrets are the true reflection of who you really are...