Skydiving saved my life

[OneJumpWally 0]

Before I got my depression under control with medications I was suicidal and tried a couple times to stick myself with two 14 gauge catheters and let them bleed out. (its not easy) but I thought this would be painless and peaceful. I saw some skydiving videos a buddy posted on facebook. I thought wow, that must be worth living for...On my way to the DZ I cried maybe half the drive there telling myself that I was either going to LIVE OR DIE lol. I realize after 110 jumps how silly that was considering how relatively safe it is. The thing is...after that I had a reason to live. SKYDIVING ! that was my thing and I cant imagine life without it.

[JohnMitchell 14]

Good to hear.

Skydiving has been a big positive in my life too. I would be so bored and often so unmotivated without it.

Make sure that the problems that chased you into our sport get the attention they deserve. Looks like you had some serious stuff going on that needs to be resolved. We're here for you, okay.

[OneJumpWally 0]

The other thing is the remembrance of military veterans. Our brothers that did not make it home. Men and women that did not come home. THEY did not make it home because they died in battle.

[CarpeDiem3 0]

If you ever get those urges again, don't use skydiving as your way out. Respect this sport enough to not give it a black eye. Stay well.

[jackwallace 3]

Maybe you'll end up the head of USPA. Bill Ottley once told me a similar story. He was fat and unhealthy. Started jumping and the rest is history, as they say.

U only make 2 jumps: the first one for some weird reason and the last one that you lived through. The rest are just filler.
scr 316

[J-S 0]

I'm glad skydiving gave you a new outlook and respect for life. Always keep it in your mind though, YOU saved your life, by seeking the help you needed. Skydiving, medications, therapy, friends/family are the tools and support YOU and yourself sought. You prove everyday, and have proved you are more powerful than your mind.

As you said, always remember your (our) falling brothers and sisters and what they gave to want to make a better life for you and everyone else. You owe it to yourself and to them to live life the best you can, I'm sure they would want nothing less for you. Always remember that you can give that to them and they deserve that.

Keep your head up If you fall, use that strong mind of yours, and ask for that hand back up to where you are today.

Enjoy all the blue skies ahead of you!

Shawn.

[riggerrob 558]

I hear you brother and thanks for sharing.

Like you, I suffered from depression, bullying, anxiety, insomnia, etc. for many years.
Skydiving helped me get through the difficult parts. For many years, that adrenaline rush was the only thing that registered on my weakened brain. The only other outside stimulus - that compared - was a Royal Canadian Navy ship's-firefighting-course!

It is only after age 50 that I started to gain control of my demons. The process started with quitting drinking. Despite many years of heavy drinking, I never found an answer in a bottle. After three attempts, I sobered up and have remained sober for 16 years. Alcoholics Anonymous helped, but I am still working through my own problems. For many years afterwards, I was a "dry drunk" ... sober, but still angry.

Another thing that helped was reading some theoretical textbooks about depression. Some of the best books are written by Doctor Gabor Matte, who treats heroin/crack/speed/drugs too new to mentioned in medical textbooks/etc. addicts in Vancouver's squalid Downtown East Side. Dr. Matte had wrestled with some of his own demons, but he also provides valuable insights into the thought processes of un-recoverable drug addicts. Dr. Matte blaims many of their problems on poor parenting. He believes that drugs, etc. fill "a hole in the heart" left by poor parenting.
Many of Dr. Matte's insights did not sink in until I started driving a bus through Vancouver's DTES, then I saw the narrow gap between my "respectable" career and the desperate lives of so many addicts.

People with healthy childhoods may attempt hard drugs - or skydiving - once or twice, saw "that was mildly amusing" then move on to some other adventure, but people who were raised in a loveless environment desperately crave the artificial love provided by drugs ... and I count the adrenaline rush from skydiving as an addictive drug.

Another valuable book was "Positive Addictions." The author's thesis was that some people are easily addicted to drugs and the only cure is to find a "positive addiction" like marathon running, skydiving, jesus, yoga, etc. I tried distance running (mostly 20 kilometers) as a cure. Despite the running's calming affects, I still struggled to not punch out @$$hole Master Warrant Officers.

In conclusion, we are glad to hear that you found skydiving to be the positive addiction that lifts you out of depression. But I still encourage you to continue studying the underlying problems that drove you into depression. Keep your chin up, because it may take you as many decades - as me - to pull yourself fully out of that hole.

[OneJumpWally 0]

Thanks guys, Thats an interesting take on it Rob. I still have not stopped drinking after many attempts. The other night I told my wife "If i drink alone again I have to buy you a purse" the next day i was waisted lol. Not easy to do and you did it! it takes a lot of willpower/ congrats and thx for the advise :)