Skratch Garrison and Dave DeWolf?

[steve1 5]

I met both these great older jumpers at Lost Prairie this year. I know there is a lot of skydiving history that goes along with their names, and I was wondering if anyone could tell me more about their accomplishments or stories from the old days......Steve1

[airtwardo 6]

Steve~

I will tell you one thing...

I'm here at EAA Oshkosh opening the show..

In the 'performer' bar I heard several 'Handsome Dave' stories from some old time jumpers that knew
he...Joe and the 'Short Man' ..."back iin the DAY"
as they say.

I KNOW the stories are true...
And "I" can't belive they got away with some of that stuff!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[steve1 5]

I made some jumps yesterday with Gary (Hod) Sanders. He knows Skratch well, and jumped with him back in the old days. He said that in 1975 he and B.J. Worth and Skratch travelled to Checkoslavakia to jump with the Russians for the first time. If I have my story straight 1975 was the first year America was doing a joint Space Venture with Russia by docking their space capsule with ours and doing some things in outer space.

Hod said he only had about 700 jumps back then and it was really cool to be jumping with Russians who had thousands and thousands. On one of their first jumps he, B.J., and Skratch built a three way wedge that docked with a three way all Russian wedge. This represented the docking in outer space and the coming together of our two countries in improved relations. Hod said it was hard to communicate with these folks because of the difference in languages. He said later that night everyone was speaking quite well using the universal language of vodka-ese. Apparently Russian jumpers drink a lot of the stuff after a good day of jumping....Steve1

[DBCOOPER 1]

Hansome Dave One Liners

- Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

- Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive..."

- A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

- A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here."

- A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

- A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."

- Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

- Two cows standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy.

- An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.

- I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.

- A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, "Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't - I've cut off your arms!"

- Two termites walk into a bar. One asks, "Is the bar tender here?"

Replying to: Re: Stall On Jump Run Emergency Procedure? by billvon

If the plane is unrecoverable then exiting is a very very good idea.

[feuergnom 22]

Quote

- Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"

ROFLMAO!

got any more?

The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle

dudeist skydiver # 666

[nitrochute 2]

did you ever hear of alexander graham kowalsky? he was the first telephone pole!

[DBCOOPER 1]

A skeleton walks into a bar and says"give me a beer and a mop".

If you want more you'll have to look him up at the freefall convention.

Replying to: Re: Stall On Jump Run Emergency Procedure? by billvon

If the plane is unrecoverable then exiting is a very very good idea.

[skr 1]

Hi Steve,

>Checkoslavakia

It was actually Yugoslavia in a town called Portoroz.

We made a bunch of movies of sequential relative
work at the Gulch in 1975.

We showed them at the US nationals and also the
world meet in Warendorf, Germany.

Then BJ, Hod and I drove down to Portoroz to show
them to the Russians, actually we wanted to turn on
the whole Eastern Bloc, but we thought in terms of
"the Russians" because if they went for it so would
everybody else.

We drove to the dropzone but not much was going on,
so we found the hotel where the competitors were
staying.

We (3 long haired hippy looking dudes) walked up
to the desk and BJ said we want a room right next
to the Russian team.

The clerk said basically no way. BJ is very persuasive
so the clerk goes in back and out comes this very
senior lady, authorized to handle weird stuff like us
I guess.

She also said no way, but when we went up to our
room we were right next to the Russian team.



>Russians who had thousands and thousands

Yes, they were really good in the air.

I had the most jumps of our group at 1,700+ and
their least experienced guy had 4,200 if I remember
correctly.

We used an old AN-2 with various style and accuracy
people getting out a 600 and 2,000 meters. The Russian
pilot said we could only go to 3,000 meters.

It was pretty quiet and restrained on the way up, but
after the last style and accuracy person got out the
whole atmosphere changed.

One of the Russians went up and told the pilot 4,000
meters, and they started clowning around and climbing
around outside the plane and stuff.

They didn't do much relative work at home but they
were really, really good.

We built two facing wedges, let go and redocked,
symbolizing the Apollo-Soyuz mission.

I still have the piece of paper where we drew the
plan and then all signed it.



Skydiving brotherhood transcends nationality.

I don't know whether they spoke any English but I
had taken a couple years of Russian. I used to
translate math papers as a graduate student.

But scientific Russian isn't much use for day to
day drop zone talk.

But Hod is right, after downing an 8 ounce glass
of straight vodka I seemed to remember words that
I didn't even know :-) :-)

It was quite a trip.

Skr

[airtwardo 6]

Checkoslavakia

Quote

Two words......"Mr. Bubble" !!!

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[steve1 5]

Thanks for the great story Skratch. I guess I kind of changed some of the facts. Hod is still busy keeping his drop zone going while working full time as a Postman. He made 19 tandems the other day. I wish I had that kind of endurance. I haven't seen B.J. since the seventies. I guess he doesn't have a pony tail anymore. If you ever get to Stevensville stop in. Maybe we could get Walt Mercer to fly us. He got his private license back a few weeks ago after the heart-murmor problem. He even flew a load of jumpers the other day for old times sake (with another commercial pilot on board). And come to Lost Prairie again. Maybe it will be cooler next year.....Steve1

[chuckbrown 0]

I have the great fortune of jumping with Dave on a regular basis here in Maytown, PA. 72 years old and still jumping 300 times a year. He's my idol (even if he won't do CRW). The most incredible story I've heard from him was the one where he had a double malfunction (I believe he's had more than one) and was getting ready to go in ... only to land in the only tree standing in the middle of acres of fields. The trees limbs stopped him from becoming a lawn dart. The best part of the story was he was in team training and when his team members found him alive, they told him to get another rig and get on the next load. Nothing stops team training. Truly one of the greats.

[chuckbrown 0]

Dave Dewolf joke:

How does a blind skydiver know when he's close to the ground?


The leash goes slack.

[Genego 2]

Met Dave at his riggers course, and began teaching for him the next year, did you know that he writes down the punch lines to jokes so he can remember them?
My favorite Dave joke was heard after beer 30 at his loft. He heard two jokes in quick succession: "I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous" and "I'm an atheist, Thank God"
He bounded up the stairs and said to all and sundry in the kitchen:
"i'D GIVE MY RIGHT ARM TO BE AN ATHEIST!!!"
We sent him back downstairs. If you get the chance, ask Dapper Dave to tell you the MOM joke. The only joke I know that made him fall down on the floor laughing, (in a resturant).
Ask him about Heavy Drop Helen the drop test dummy.
And also ask him about the reaction a Static LIne Jumpmaster had to his left hand throwout after his shoulder injury.
Blue Skies
Benny Goolsby, D-10375
QGC

I live with fear and terror, but sometimes I leave her and go skydiving.