BigWaveDave 0 #1 December 17, 2003 I've compiled a list of the shortest books ever written that I would like to see. Everyone feel free to add, as I'm sure there are many more out there. Just no stupid ones, although I probably have a few myself. And lets try not to do anything political. For instance, anything mocking Bill Clinton or George Bush can easily go both ways, so try not to make this a idiotic partisan thread. "Things I Wouldn't Do for Money" by Dennis Rodman "Human Rights Advances in China" "My Plan To Find The Real Killers" by OJ Simpson "Career Opportunities for Women's Studies Majors" "A Mature Day in My Life" by Latrell Sprewell "Detroit - A Travel Guide" "George Foreman's Big Book of Baby Names" "A Marxist's Guide To Running a Successful Economy" "How to Have A Happy Home Life And Marriage" by Joey Buttafucco "A Hiker's Guide To The Ho Chi Minh Trail" "Asian Compendium Of English Pronunciation" "The Nation of Islam Guide To Pork Dishes" "Rapper's Guide To Class and Etiquette" "Safe Driving, the Pakistani Way" "Attractive Trekkies (A Pictorial)" "One Hundred Years of Great British Food" "Mike Tyson’s Guide to Modern Feminism with a special section: On Dating Etiquette" "My Life On The Wagon, by Ted Kennedy" "Great Moments In Scab Football" "Stories of French Bravery" "Supermodels of Wisconsin (A Pictorial)" "The Women of IT (A Pictorial)" "Business Management and Stockholder Satisfaction" by Kenneth Lay. "Fortifying Your Country" by Andre Maginot. "The Big Book of Amish Porn" "Success: The Pauly Shore Biography" "After Seinfeld: The supporting actor's guide to a successful spin-off" "Masculinity and Manhood" by Carson Daly with foreword by David Beckham "The DARE Handbook" by Rush Limbaugh“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #2 December 17, 2003 "Blonde's words of wisdom"__________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #3 December 17, 2003 How to win friends - Darth Vader Whole family recipies - Jeff Dahlmer I'm ok, you're Ok - Chuck Manson Three tracks in the Snow - Won Hunglo Our Happy Family - Hillary Clinton The hitchhikers guide to celebacy - Bill Clinton My Modeling Career - Chelsea ClintonI'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kramer 0 #4 December 17, 2003 edited for pedophelia reference "Oops" -Bill Clinton "Things wrong with Christianity" -Billy Graham "A Pictoral History of My Breasts With Captions" -Britney Spears -Kramer The FAKE KRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMER!!!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
n2skdvn 0 #5 December 17, 2003 successful trading - martha stewartif my calculations are correct SLINKY + ESCULATOR = EVERLASTING FUN my site Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mikkey 0 #6 December 17, 2003 "Humor in Accounting"--------------------------------------------------------- When people look like ants - pull. When ants look like people - pray. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #7 December 17, 2003 "How to win friends and influence people in the African American community" by David DukeKevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #8 December 17, 2003 "Humility After Fame" by Gary Coleman "If it doesn't leave a mark, I didn't do it" by Todd BridgesKevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #9 December 17, 2003 "How to quit drinking" - Ted Kennedy__________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigWaveDave 0 #10 December 17, 2003 Quote"Humility After Fame" by Gary Coleman "If it doesn't leave a mark, I didn't do it" by Todd Bridges "B-Ballin' and Shot Callin" by Gary Coleman“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #11 December 17, 2003 "Choosing the Right Man" by Dominque DunneKevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #12 December 17, 2003 "Topics not discussed on dz.com" "Best ways to gross out your friends" - Bill VonNovak "Proper and complete care of your teeth" - Anonymous British Author "Things to do besides postwhore on DZ.com" - Collaboration between Clay, AggieDave, jtval and Sunshine and Skybytch. "Why reposting is a good idea" - Crazy Ivan "Proper spotting techniques" - Skreamer "Directory of hot porn sites" - Kallend Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yoink 321 #13 December 17, 2003 how to be a sucessful pop star - Gina G and Chesney Hawkes Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigWaveDave 0 #14 December 17, 2003 More... "Pure Class - Guide to Fine Dining, Manners, Art, and Literature" by Anna Nicole Smith "How to Fight Like a Man" by Oscar de la Hoya "Pleasing Your Man" by Rosie O'Donnell "Keeping the Band Together" by Yoko Ono Trent Lott's Guide to Embracing Diversity "Effective Communication" by Ozzy Osbourne Christopher Reeve’s Guide to Mastering Dance Dance Revolution or "The Definitive Guide to Perfect Breakdancing" by Christopher Reeve "The Winner Within" by the Chicago Cubs "Crack Aficionado"“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The111 1 #15 December 17, 2003 "The importance of rapid canopy downsizing" - USPAwww.WingsuitPhotos.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigWaveDave 0 #16 December 17, 2003 Scott Lutz's Guide To Effective AFF Instruction“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #17 December 17, 2003 Quote"The importance of rapid canopy downsizing" - USPA My guide to safe landings - Scott LutzI'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #18 December 17, 2003 "How-to guide: SINGING" - Milli Vanilli__________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigWaveDave 0 #19 December 17, 2003 "Subtle Acting" by William Shatner "Electrolysis for Better Living" by Robin Williams Baghdad Bob's Guide to Media Credibility "Soaring With The Eagles: A Guide To Flight Instruction" by JFK Jr. Male Asian Pornstars - The Complete Listing“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The111 1 #20 December 17, 2003 QuoteMy guide to safe landings - Scott Lutz Ahahaha, two Lutz posts in 5 minutes. Your legend will never die, Scotty! More: "How to accept responsibility for your own fuckups" - Lutzwww.WingsuitPhotos.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jib 0 #21 December 17, 2003 My life before plastic surgery -- Cher or Michael Jackson -------------------------------------------------- the depth of his depravity sickens me. -- Jerry Falwell, People v. Larry Flynt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #22 December 17, 2003 "Everything I know about Scott Lutz" - by Me Who the hell is it? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigWaveDave 0 #23 December 17, 2003 After lurking for a while on these boards, I've come up with the shortest book of all time: "Effective Time Management: How To Stay Productive In The Workplace" by the Dropzone.com forum members“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.” - Vincent van Gogh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The111 1 #24 December 17, 2003 Quote"Everything I know about Scott Lutz" - by Me Who the hell is it? "How to use the DZ.com search function" - PKev the origins of the term Lutz Read the whole post and definitely watch the video for a laugh. www.WingsuitPhotos.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #25 December 17, 2003 Oh THAAAAAAAT guy. Yeah, I remember that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
