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yoink

total comedy

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In a bar today a mate and I got playing pool with a couple of lads... we got talking about extreme sports and one of them says "yeah, we skydive... it's really cool".
Great... perks my interest; so I ask where and how long they've been doing it...:) they look a little uncomfortable and say 'down south' and 'a while'... okaaaay.. time to have some fun with them :ph34r:
Me: wow! how high do you jump from?
Them: oh, usually 35,000 feet - about 2 miles :D
Me: sounds really cool! but what if your parachute doesn't work :P
Them: Oh, I used to jump with two just in case, but only have one now. :o
Me: How often do they fail?
Them: once every three or four times you use it, I guess... I've made a coupla hundred jumps, so I know the risk - that's why I only use one...

....

:D:D:D:D:D
My friend was cracking up into his beer.... these guys were no more skydivers than I am a gerbil. :D Why do people bother!


Edit: so apparently there's a UK DZ that jumps at 35 grand! I'm going - but only if I can pack my own gear! Mal every 4 jumps!!! The repack bill would be horrendous! :D

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guys know nothing about skydiving or math...
35,000 feet or about 2 miles????
is'nt a mile 5280 or there abouts making 35000
about 6 and a half miles???
dumbasses making an ass of themselfs


_________________________________________
The Angel of Duh has spoke

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Edit: so apparently there's a UK DZ that jumps at 35 grand! I'm going - but only if I can pack my own gear! Mal every 4 jumps!!! The repack bill would be horrendous! :D



Not if you're only wearing one parachute!

"Be braver -- you can't cross a chasm in two small jumps."

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Man, that is funny. Thanks for posting it.

You gotta wonder what motivates people like that. I guess that for one thing, they expect that so few people are skydivers that they'd never get caught in a lie, or that the chances are very slim.

Why, though, would someone go around trying to seem cool because he skydives, but never bother to actually skydive (and learn the facts)?? I mean, if you want to pick something "cool" to be "into" just to impress people, why not stick to something that's easier to know the lingo/facts about? It seems to me an odd choice to boast of being a skydiver when you're a total whuffo, relying on "facts" probably gleaned from "Drop Zone" (the movie). How pathetic.

It shows admirable restraint that you didn't take the guys down in an embarrassing way. I wonder what would have happened if you had taken them aside and whispered to them, "I don't know why you've chosen to represent yourselves as skydivers, but as a skydiver myself I know you're full of shit, you've never jumped, and you know nothing about skydiving..." :P

That woulda been funny.
-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

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It shows admirable restraint that you didn't take the guys down in an embarrassing way. I wonder what would have happened if you had taken them aside and whispered to them, "I don't know why you've chosen to represent yourselves as skydivers, but as a skydiver myself I know you're full of shit, you've never jumped, and you know nothing about skydiving..." :P

That woulda been funny.



They were both bigger than me... and with pool cues in hand I thought it might not have been the best idea. :$:P

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You get used to it...After a while you don't mess with them anymore.

One time I had a friend that was female...(just friends..It CAN happen, and she was hot). This guy was hitting on her...

He started talking about how he skydives. (I perk up) He started talking about how great it is blah blah balah....Then he says how great his instructor is...Now I knew why I didn't know him. He was a student. But then he says the guys name...And the guy is only a tandem instructor.

Come to find out this guy has only done two tandems about 6 mths ago...But he was a "Skydiver".

The jig was up when Kat turned to me and said "How many jumps do you have Ron?" And I said "600".

His face was kinda neat to watch...Never seen color fade so fast.

Another time in a bar a guy is wearing a "Now Fear" skydiving shirt. My buddy asks him if he jumps. The guy said yes and that it was not for weinies, and that we probley could not handle it. He was trying to impress this girl. (My buddy had 3,500 jumps, and his Dad owned the DZ. And I had about 700 at the time). We asked him where he jumped..Got to far away DZ story...Ect. Then we asked him about his license while we pulled out our USPA cards and showed him our Instrutor ratings. He lost the girl.

At dinner just a few weeks ago Ladyskydiver, Kramer, myself, and my Wuffo g/f were out to eat. Kramer has a JumpRun.com jacket on...A guy starts saying how he skydives...It seems he has a whole 6 jumps. Each at several different DZ's.

Now Kramer has 1500 jumps I think, Cora has 300, and I have 3,000 jumps. None of us said anything to him. His wife was big, fat, bitchy and clearly wore the pants in that family...We let him be the big man he always wanted to be.

You get used to it.

It happens all the time.
"No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334

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LMAO! Oh God my stomach hurts thats is two days in a row. I'm sorry,but I feel no shame in telling someone when they ask me that I only have one jump to my name and I have to wait my turn. I'll get mine when hubby has his. Why is honesty so hard for some?-Caress:D:D:D
I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being
right.

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