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kelel01

Ever get to the point . . .

By kelel01, in The Bonfire

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waltappel    1

waltappel
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You would think so, wouldn't you? :P;)



Yeah, but I would also thing that in general, more young women would figure out that dating assholes generally doesn't work out very well.

I've heard the theory that it's a genetic thing with women--that they instinctively want to mate with a guy who is a real asshole if she thinks she can control him. The theory claims that women do so instinctively because that kind of guy would seem to be the best option for protecting her and her offspring.

Might be some truth to that, I don't know. It kind of makes sense, though.

Walt

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waltappel    1

waltappel
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I don't know they're assholes when I first start dating them. They always (ok, 99% of the time :D) seem like nice guys.

Methinks there ARE no nice guys.



Just a few thoughts.

It's not that hard to figure out. Have lunch with him--something with a time limit on it--in a place that doesn't serve alcohol. Use it like an interview. No need to make a big production out of it; just tell him you want to have lunch and get to know him a little better.

If he's not a student, find out what he does for a living. Get an idea an idea what his income level is. Now, if you find out what kind of car he drives, what kind of place he lives in, etc., you can get some idea on how responsible he is with money.

Ask him about his most recent SO and any before that. Why are they no longer together?

How often does he go out partying? How much does he drink? Does he use drugs? If so, what kind and how often and how much?

Has he ever been married?

Is he *currently* married?

Has he ever been arrested?

Figure out what your "deal breakers" are and ask about them. You can either be direct or not. These days, guys understand that there are a lot of freaks out there and women need to be very cautious.

Walt

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waltappel    1

waltappel
Ok Kel, I have a question for you. Last night a friend (a woman) asked me for some advice. The short version is that an acquaintance of hers (a guy) is showing some interest in a woman she considers pretty skanky and she was asking if she should warn the guy.

My friend spent a few days around her and she was getting falling down drunk every night, not changing clothes or bathing for 3 days in a row, had some sort of skin infections around her "thang" (my friend saw her naked). Plus the active cold sores, and generally bad personal hygiene.

She's seen her acquaintance and this chick hanging all over each other.

My take on it is that she should stay out of it. What do you think?

Walt

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kbordson    8

kbordson
ok... I know you asked Kel... but you posted it on the open forum, so fair game.

Whether she tells or not, depends on how close of friends he and her are. Are they close enough that it would come across as just warning? Or too close that it might seem jealous or bitter? Or will he just see it as "blocking"?

Personally if he was a good friend... I'd try to give him a heads up on things... but he's probably bright enough to pick up on those points anyways.

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LisaH    0

LisaH
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ok... I know you asked Kel... but you posted it on the open forum, so fair game.

Whether she tells or not, depends on how close of friends he and her are. Are they close enough that it would come across as just warning? Or too close that it might seem jealous or bitter? Or will he just see it as "blocking"?

Personally if he was a good friend... I'd try to give him a heads up on things... but he's probably bright enough to pick up on those points anyways.



I'm the one who talked to Walt about this. I am truly concerned for my friend. This girl is nasty. I don't see how he can't notice B|
Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

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LisaH    0

LisaH
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. . . Where you decide to use the opposite sex strictly as play toys to satisfy your sexual desires?

'Cause you men ain't good for shit beyond that. >:( Mama still needs booty, though. :D



In regards to this original post...men ARE only good for satisfying sexual desires. If you want something substantial, hop the fence ;)
Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

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kelel01    1

kelel01
Yeah, I would tell him, too. [:/]

And I'm glad to know that girl's not me, even though I do the falling-down-drunk thing every once in a while. :D

Although I'm not sure why Walt felt the need to ask me that.

And Walt, the deal breakers never come out until later. One guy was everybody's favorite "nice guy", successful, driven, smart, funny, etc. Then he turned out to be really aggressive later, and that shocked the hell out of me. That was the end of that.

This most recent guy is just a big baby. He always thinks I'm attacking him when I ask a simple question. And being evasive is not a good way to get me to let something go. It definitely makes me think something's up. But he's one of these "nice guys finish last" people, when I hate to tell him, he ain't that nice of a guy.

I'd like to hear one guy (NOT from the BASE community :D) actually admit that he's an asshole. Most guys who are honestly have no clue.

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LisaH    0

LisaH
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Quote

In regards to this original post...men ARE only good for satisfying sexual desires. If you want something substantial, hop the fence ;)



Umm... isn't your opinion a little *ahem* biased? ;)



Of course it is....;)
Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

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LisaH    0

LisaH
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Quote

In regards to this original post...men ARE only good for satisfying sexual desires. If you want something substantial, hop the fence ;)



Well I guess I won't need to bother to ask you to marry me, huh?:D:D

Walt



Sure you can...ask away ;)
Be yourself!
MooOOooOoo

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