theonlyski 3 #1 July 13, 2011 ... co workers show up with a stun gun and decide it's a fun thing to play with today. (Almost all of us being military or former military guys) Anyone else got anything?"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eeneR 1 #2 July 13, 2011 Over the last couple days I have clearly learned that diesel fuel does not smell anywhere near as good as Jet-A. Damnit ComEd get this shit fixed! She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway." eeneR TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #3 July 13, 2011 Quote Over the last couple days I have clearly learned that diesel fuel does not smell anywhere near as good as Jet-A. Damnit ComEd get this shit fixed! No kidding! JP8 either!"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #4 July 13, 2011 The wannabe lumberjack next door drops a 100 footer across the property taking out a section of fence letting the dogs take off for parts unknown...and finding ones self tromping through heavy woods full of poison ivy & poison oak with a pocket full of hot-dogs trying to lure the scared shitless fur covered razorblades back to the zone of destruction...on a 95 degree 90% humidity morning...before COFFEE! Tase ME bro! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #5 July 13, 2011 Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door drops a 100 footer across the property taking out a section of fence letting the dogs take off for parts unknown...and finding ones self tromping through heavy woods full of poison ivy & poison oak with a pocket full of hot-dogs trying to lure the scared shitless fur covered razorblades back to the zone of destruction...on a 95 degree 90% humidity morning...before COFFEE! Tase ME bro! I dont think your heart could handle the tazer. Stun guns are different though, they just hurt less. "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #6 July 13, 2011 Quote Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door drops a 100 footer across the property taking out a section of fence letting the dogs take off for parts unknown...and finding ones self tromping through heavy woods full of poison ivy & poison oak with a pocket full of hot-dogs trying to lure the scared shitless fur covered razorblades back to the zone of destruction...on a 95 degree 90% humidity morning...before COFFEE! Taze ME bro! I dont think your heart could handle the tazer. Stun guns are different though, they just hurt less. What makes you think I even HAVE a heart? The guy next door with the chainsaw jammed up his ass sure doesn't think I do!! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #7 July 13, 2011 Quote Quote Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door drops a 100 footer across the property taking out a section of fence letting the dogs take off for parts unknown...and finding ones self tromping through heavy woods full of poison ivy & poison oak with a pocket full of hot-dogs trying to lure the scared shitless fur covered razorblades back to the zone of destruction...on a 95 degree 90% humidity morning...before COFFEE! Taze ME bro! I dont think your heart could handle the tazer. Stun guns are different though, they just hurt less. What makes you think I even HAVE a heart? The guy next door with the chainsaw jammed up his ass sure doesn't think I do!! Because if you didn't have a heart, it would be a jack hammer."I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
monkycndo 0 #8 July 13, 2011 Having a coworker tell of an incident in a very matter of fact way, but once he gets to the meat of the story, makes you go "Holy Shit!!!" But then seeing the photo makes your sphincter slam shut so hard a diamond would have been turned to dust.No animals or humans were seriously harmed in said incident, if it actually happened. 50 donations so far. Give it a try. You know you want to spank it Jump an Infinity Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #9 July 13, 2011 Quote Quote Quote Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door drops a 100 footer across the property taking out a section of fence letting the dogs take off for parts unknown...and finding ones self tromping through heavy woods full of poison ivy & poison oak with a pocket full of hot-dogs trying to lure the scared shitless fur covered razorblades back to the zone of destruction...on a 95 degree 90% humidity morning...before COFFEE! Taze ME bro! I dont think your heart could handle the tazer. Stun guns are different though, they just hurt less. What makes you think I even HAVE a heart? The guy next door with the chainsaw jammed up his ass sure doesn't think I do!! Because if you didn't have a heart, it would be a jack hammer. RUNNING!! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #10 July 13, 2011 Quote Having a coworker tell of an incident in a very matter of fact way, but once he gets to the meat of the story, makes you go "Holy Shit!!!" But then seeing the photo makes your sphincter slam shut so hard a diamond would have been turned to dust.No animals or humans were seriously harmed in said incident, if it actually happened. We're waiting for the photo."I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,408 #11 July 13, 2011 Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door ... Does he like to wear women's clothing?"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #12 July 13, 2011 Quote Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door ... Does he like to wear women's clothing? Yup...and he's OKAY! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iluvtofly 0 #13 July 13, 2011 Quote Quote Quote The wannabe lumberjack next door ... Does he like to wear women's clothing? Yup...and he's OKAY! Does he sleep all night and work all day? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
d_squared431 0 #14 July 14, 2011 When you arrive to work at 801 am and your morning daily meeting has been going on for 5 minutes prior due to a clock being fast and you getting the mgrs raised voice due to others pissing her off prior to you getting to work...... and a few hrs later when a patient clenches her 78yr old fist, her facial color changes two shades of red as she stands up swinger her clenched fist at you and then her fist becomes a pointed finger about an inch from your face all while her bitchy granddaughter is yelling at you and calling you a dumb ass. yep, that's when you know it is going to be a good day...(this was yesterday)TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1 I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites