flyhi 24 #1 November 1, 2002 Got to give a brief to my boss' boss' boss today and I need a joke with which to open. Anyone got one that is short, understandable, and not lewd or bawdy? I already used Slappie's Charles Dickens martini joke so I can't use that one again. It killed by the way. Mahalo Slapster.Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhreeZone 15 #2 November 1, 2002 The interrupting cow joke is a killer.... Person 1: Knock, knock.. Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Interupting Cow's Person 2: Inter--- Person 1 (before Person 2 can finish): MOO!!! An interupting cow thats who...Yesterday is history And tomorrow is a mystery Parachutemanuals.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #3 November 1, 2002 or you can trade the joke for "uneasyness" just say . "good morning, I am here for BLAH BLAH BLAH. and my uncle touched me when I was 7." they are sure to be too uneasy to notice your briefing sucked! My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,150 #4 November 1, 2002 What's Slappie's Charles Dickens martini joke? I don't have a good one to share, but I can always share that one with someone else... wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,150 #5 November 1, 2002 A saleswoman is driving toward home in Northern Arizona when she sees a Native American woman hitchhiking. Because the trip had been long and quiet, she stops the car and offers the Native American woman a ride. After a bit of small talk, the Native American woman notices a brown bag on the front seat. "What's in the bag?", she asks. "It's a bottle of wine. I got it for my husband", says the saleswoman. The Native American woman is silent for a while, nods several times, and then says, "Good trade".There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #6 November 1, 2002 A preacher goes to a seminar on good preaching techniques. The instructor goes to the podium and everyone is still restless and mumbling. He starts out with "you know...last night I kissed a woman good night who was not my wife". The audience gasps. He continues "...it was my own dear mother." The audience giggles. "So, you see that everyone was chatting among yourselves and now I have galvanized your attention and have you in a relaxed mood now. That is the key to a good opening line." The student is astounded. That was great. The student returns to his own congregation. He walks up to the pulpit, looks around and announces "Last night, I kissed a woman good night and it was not my wife." The audience gasps. In a faltering voice he continues "I wish I could remember who it was..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyhi 24 #7 November 3, 2002 QuoteA saleswoman is driving toward home in Northern Arizona when she sees a Native American woman hitchhiking. ... A very functional opening. Changed it around a little and the bag held something which was covered in the brief and it was for my boss. A nice segue. The C. D. Martini joke? Man walks in a bar and says give me a Charles Dickens martini. The bartender says, "Olive or twist?" Everyone groans, but evryone steals it. I know. I did. Mahalo.Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
