Farflung

377, You have some great powers of recall. The 'Cosmetics Magnate' owned a company called Holiday Magic (yeah that one) which also held the distinction of being the largest Ponzi scheme in US history. Since eclipsed by Madoff and a dozen others. His empire was in deep decline and under siege from the FTC, IRS and several states for fraudulent business practices. His fleet of aircraft included the P-51 he crashed and two Canadian F-86 fighters. The law prohibits private citizens from purchasing an American F-86 but had no problem with Patrick purchasing a Canadian version. So far so good. So Mr. Cosmetics claims the F-86 was to be used to advertise his ladies make-up and lotions. The IRS was fine with that but put that pesky fiscal year deadline of 30 September in the mix along with a basic requirement for use and display. Yep, the plane was barely out of the shop when the accident pilot received his 'training' and put on an ambitious exhibition schedule. In fact, Sacramento was the second display (24 Sept 72) with another scheduled the following day in Concord, CA. The F-86 instructor pilot was laid off and the less experienced (code for cheaper) pilot retained. The more I researched this story, the more it made me sick. William Penn Patrick had six days previous to the Sacramento crash been found liable in the death of a lawyer named Dedina who had his plane serviced by Patrick's organization. Apparently Dedina was in communications with ATC during his mishap where he could not pull his plane out of a trim tab induced dive. In addition to his crashes was the unsolved burning of a plane that State Senator Murphy had chartered from Patrick. This guy should have been associated with some red flags. Before Patrick's death and after the Sacramento crash (8 month window) a California Superior Court Judge threw out a lawsuit Patrick filed against a newspaper reporter that had published an article about Patrick's careless operations at his home airport. Un-freakin-believable. So there you have it. The cause of the Sacramento crash was the pilots over-rotation of the accident aircraft.

georger, Translation. I guess in the F-86 crash where film of the event and testimony by all involved was some expectation of resolution on my part. How did this happen, what caused it and most important - what may prevent a repeat? Nope, no such thing. Summary. Other threads on DZ.com have subjects with a great amount of factual data (safety) combined with massive amounts of personal experience with skydiving. What conclusions or solutions or improvements have resulted from those subjects? I'm having trouble finding an example. Perhaps you could help me out there. Be the subject Cooper, skydiving or super-capacitors; there will always be various signal to noise ratios which affect people differently. I read a crash report and glean some data that others may not notice. Conversely, others will extract information where I'm completely in the dark. Here is an example; "We have had 1.2 million jumps in 13 and one half years". Is this a good or bad thing? I thought picking a subject which was not related directly to Cooper or skydiving could serve as an analogy without the associated bias or passions. Klaatu Barada Nikto.

The flow of information and the value of open forums has been questioned lately. What would a person or agency do with access to information with the intent to create a more probable solution or general improvement? When was the last time you called Amana or Maytag to say the refrigerator is running just fine? I thought so. By nature we are sedentary, lazy and self absorbed. Paradoxically, it is those very attributes that drive us to make enhancements to life which allow us to live longer and experience more sloth and self absorption. Except for me, I'm the paragon of efficiency, charity and sacrifice for others. Events transpire in a rough triad of activities in my world. First is the initial reports (news) where the refrigerator is not running like it was. This is closely followed by a spate of zero value, throw away phrases which are in the mitochondrial DNA of our national lexicon. Perhaps you have heard some of these gems yourself: "Let's wait until the report is published", "What happened to innocent until proven guilty?", "More information will be published as it becomes available" and my personal favorite "Don't be judgmental". The last one kills me since it is impossible to admonish one for the act without first committing it yourself. The last phase is the quiet, cold, dry and lonely report on the event. No one will ever read, study or heed the lessons learned from some form of loss. Too emotive, too close, too rare and will never happen to me. Less than a year after Cooper's caper there was a horrendous crash of a "civilian F-86" (N275X) into an ice cream parlor in Sacramento, CA. More than 20 people were killed and more than 20 were seriously burned when that aircraft failed to lift off and had little distance to decelerate from 130 knots. Of course there was investigations, lawsuits, expert analysis, testimony, counter-suits and settlements. Many years later the settlements barely got a paragraph in the C section of the local paper. One of the parties found to be liable was the ice cream parlor for being where an aircraft could hit. Was someone making this up? Business licenses, health inspectors, building inspectors, FAA surveys and commercial insurance appraisers all approved the location and operation of this enterprise. What is the point of a license, permit, survey and risk assessment? The NTSB made this finding - "The catastrophic consequence of this accident is directly attributed to the proximity of the shopping center to the runway". So the NTSB is saying having ice cream parlors within striking distance of a runway is un-good. The courts agreed and found the parlor partially liable and assigned a proportional monetary penalty. Hey, you know the court system will take this lesson learned and stop the encroachment of child-centric businesses in such a red zone. The parlor chain was named Farrell's and had 36 franchise locations in California. Of those 36 restaurants, 3 were located near the end of a runway. How many had airplanes crash near them? If you said "Of course all of them would suffer similar events, read the analysis", you would be correct. Thing is, the next two crashes were 10 years or more from the initial accident so they don't count. Time for more empty platitudes, "That was a looong time ago", "Things are different now" and "Same ice cream parlors, but different aircraft". The world is truly a random place as long as one has the ability to rationalize things away by parsing them to the sub atomic level. Here is a situation where the event is 38 years cold and hundreds of pages of reports and court proceedings are available as open source documents, yet little, if anything was done to prevent repeat occurrences. Crash reports would describe the Lincoln assassination as "caused by a 60 caliber lead ball entering the brain from the rear of the skull". Mr Lincoln would be partially responsible as he selected a seat which was in the direct path of the bullet which was fired from the gun. I don't think, announcing the attendance of a President to an open and public venue will cause any problems in the future. Get the White House a private theater and such events will never happen again. What astonishes me is not so much that in an information vacuum akin to D B Cooper, theories about Aliens and Elvis enter the fray. Rather the environment where ample data exists with direct personal experience where practices remain static while the event is dismissed as rare or never having happened before.

377, After more than 37 years in salt water the parachute for the Liberty Bell was very much intact. A military backpack, reserve and canvas bag would not offer much buoyancy and must weigh close to 60 pounds. Reading the transcripts makes for quite the mental picture. First Cooper is described as donning the chute like he has done it before. Then he is lashing the money to his body or harness or combination. I remember how those backpacks went down to your belt line. Wouldn't it suck to give that money bag a few wraps around you body with shroud line and unintentionally (obviously) tie the container shut? You could still pull the D-ring but the chute would be tied into the backpack. Then pulling the inert reserve. Man, what a bummer. Amazon made an excellent characterization about the aircrew military canopies. They were designed to make you 'not die'. Hitting the ground with a slight wind (10 knots) made me wonder if the landing could have been softer without the chute at all. There were two more considerations regarding the aircrew equipment. Exiting the aircraft and being conscious or uninjured is a large assumption. Paratroopers jump to begin the fight, Aircrew jump to end the fight; diametrically opposed functions. The four line modification was an option, assuming you were awake to utilize the feature or the ejection process didn't break an arm. Second was your head. As in situational awareness. Paratroopers get up knowing they will jump, suit up knowing they will jump, get into the plane to jump then jump, ditch the gear and start fighting. Aircrew have no such thoughts....ever. Triple redundant systems failing, ineffective fire suppression, enemy actions and running out of airspeed, altitude and ideas forces one to push the Ah SH*T Button then consider what to do next. Let's see....umm...flaps 10...intercepting glide path....no...something is missing, I just can't put my finger on it...the plane. Now they get to operate some equipment for the first time like their lives depended on it (taste the irony?). Comparing aircrew parachutes to paratroopers is like comparing Raquel Welch to RuPaul. From a distance there appears to be more similarities. The closer one gets to the subject the more obvious the differences become and you may want to be a little selective depending upon planned use and personal experience.

Fortune smiled upon the crew and passengers of Flight 39 as there were astonishingly no injuries. The aircraft was repaired at George Air Force Base which is located in Victorville where the coupon book was first distributed which created the demand for the air service Binstock was using. The owner of the Hacienda stretched his luck by purchasing another casino and expanding his charter services. Snake eyes for the Hacienda in the form of the second property being a money loser and the government halting the Hacienda charter flights since it was operating as a de facto scheduled airline. The Convair 240 returned to service and was eventually sold to Japan Airlines where it was ultimately destroyed in some type of mishap. Some aircraft are destined for destruction. Mrs Binstock was fighting in the court system for her husbands life insurance monies. Apparently there was some desire to argue the virtues of an insurance company paying on policies which are purchased just before a suicide in a commercial aircraft. I guess there are some things which are not self evident. Truth is infinitely stranger than fiction. What could have been embellished about Saul's story to make it any stranger? He was an operative for the CIA? He worked for Western Airlines repairing pilot's watches? He knew the Convair had a weak spot in the lavatory wall since he was employed by Vultee? What changed about airline operations as a result of Flight 39? Nothing. One would think the airlines would be required to ask you if you are in possession of dynamite and Lucky Time Coupon Books. Nope. Is your car at your destination airport? Ummm....well....here's the story.... Saul was a psycho on a suicidal mission and didn't even consider the collateral damage his stupid action would generate. He could have taken that dynamite and blown himself to smithereens while acting like he was trying to remove a tree stump. Wife gets her 'dirty green' and innocent lives are spared or not even at risk. Saul never considered this possibility since other people are disposable and simply put on Earth to serve him. He most certainly didn't adopt this viewpoint in the weeks preceding his action. The Cooper Vane was the product of several skydivers making unauthorized jumps in 727s. It's time for the aviation industry to design and implement - the 'Para-Saul'. There is too much crap going on in the lavatories of these aircraft. This is an obvious weak point in airline operations and the lavatory should be made as a modular unit with autonomous systems. Once the door is closed a timer will begin a count-down which would allow ample time for the winner of a prune eating contest to finish. Once this time is exceeded, the capsule will depressurize from the rotation of four cam-locks securing the lavatory in the fuselage. The unitized facilities would begin a gravity separation from the airframe where a secondary timer and barometric sensor would be activated by a micro switch which opens once the commode is in free fall. At this point the Para-Saul would have a set of spring deployed, stabilization fins extended while awaiting the canopy to deploy which activates the tracking beacon. The police recover the Para-Saul pod with the offending individual securely locked inside. I would patent this, but feel is serves too great a good for society and should enter public domain. In addition to the timer, a button would be wired to each seat for Strange Acting Undesirable Losers in the aircraft. If someone is acting suspicious, upon entry into the lavatory another passenger can push their SAUL button which jettisons the potty pod without the timed delay. The impact of the SAUL button would empower people to act upon suspicions and eliminate the ridiculous behaviors people display when seated next to me in airliners.

377, I have never seen the Hacienda paint scheme before. What an amazing piece of history and personal recall on your part. One of the few L-1011's still in service in the USA is owned by the Sands Corporation for employees and 'guests'. I can't think of a reason for a casino to haul a large group of employees around that can't be better handled by commercial carriers. So that just leaves the guests and they must be the Mondo-wealthy types from a conservative country. I can only imagine what sort of Stratospheric Circus Freak Show must be going on in that airframe. What goes on in casino aircraft.....stays in casino aircraft.

We realize you have a choice when selecting your airline and destination. So why is Vegas such a natural choice for individuals to become nuttier than a squirrel dropping? Why did Saul wait for the return flight to light one off in the lavatory? Was there a sale on explosives in Las Vegas or was there one last chance to recover? Saul had acquired his dynamite days before his flight to Vegas. Why light the stuff on the way home? That would risk detection for a number of reasons. The ticket agent described Saul as nothing unusual. He remembered Binstock because he gave a 'vulgar' answer when asked for his first name. The agent also recalled the flight returning to LAX rather than Burbank (origination flight) to which Binstock gave a convoluted answer about having his car at Burbank and another person would pick him up at LAX. He also recalled Binstock had no luggage or any type of carry on. Other than telling the agent to get 'phuqed', returning to the wrong airport and having no luggage, Saul Binstock was completely forgettable. What must one do to be remembered? I'm sure the same can be said about how a little 'ole watchmaker managed to acquire the dynamite in the first place. Regardless the cover story, I'll bet it was as logical as the dialogue between Saul and the ticket agent. In fact, the report suggests the explosion was of such ferocity that the Co-pilot described it as a double-barrel shotgun going off just behind his head. The crew went on to speculate that it may have woke most (just most) of the slumbering passengers. No Officer, there was no change in his behavior the weeks leading to the flight. There is never a report about how the guy was such a 'terminal jerk off' that abhorrent behavior would be hard to spot in the first place. Why is this? Yet we are advised to keep an eye out for any strange actions from people who occupy our collective orbits. It would seem these people who were always so even keeled and never getting upset about anything, would evolve into future prime suspects for no other reason than; 'never getting upset' while storing all this potential rage for one big event. I guess Saul was his usual gregarious, pull my finger, self while he planned and acquired explosives. What a kidder. Is being tolerant of, or oblivious to social conduct which far exceeds public flatulence to blame?

Saul Binstock didn't go to Vegas Baby! and blend into anonymity as is the assumption today. At least it was much more difficult considering the entire county Las Vegas occupies had around 50,000 people back then. In fact it was well known where Saul was staying in Fabulous Las Vegas. The Hacienda. History has generously recorded the Flamingo as the first destination resort in Vegas but the Hacienda produced a few firsts as well. The Hacienda was like it's Flamingo counterpart several miles from the downtown section where competing casinos could rely upon foot traffic for customers. The Flamingo attracted people with 'Big Name' shows and by flying celebrities in from Hollywood. Even then, people believed if you went where cool people were, you would be cool too. Silly, I'm sticking with the drinking beer makes me appealing to bikini clad ladies ethos. The Hacienda could not afford the Hollywood celebs or big shows so they took a completely different approach. An employee was scouting billboard locations when he noticed people bottlenecked in traffic near Victorville, CA. Yes, in early '57 at some intersection along Route 66, in the Mojave Desert, the first Vegas Coupon Fun Book was born. Rather than compete with the endless billboards in existence, the Hacienda handed out coupons for 'free' or deeply discounted stuff at their motif. Instant success. In short order, the demand for reservations grew and the Hacienda was chartering aircraft to fly guests from Los Angeles to Las Vegas to such a degree that Hacienda passengers outnumbered other airlines passenger counts. Las Vegas has become more accessible, inexpensive and one would be treated to the most modern modes of transportation - an aircraft. What did Saul Binstock give to a ticket agent at McCarran airport? If you guessed a Hacienda Big Winner Super Package Fun Coupon Book, then you would be correct. What generosity and the agent took notice. The agent noticed Binstock turn down a seat on a flight which was chartered by the Hacienda opting to wait a few more hours for the Western Airlines plane to arrive. But why wait so long for another similar aircraft? Shucks, the only difference between the two was one was a charter from an operation with a single aircraft and limited assets versus Western Airlines which operated a vast fleet with hundreds of employees. Nothing to consider here, let's move on. Is the Hacienda responsible as the genesis for the countless Big Shot Exclusive Super Double Triple Thor Knobbed Winner Special Player Coupon Books and therefore Saul selecting Western Flight 39?

The story you are about to read is true, the names aint changed. Did some historical research on an obscure event from 1957. A Western Airlines (Flt 39) from Las Vegas to LAX which involved a bomb and some skydiving. Initial reports had the plane landing at George AFB with an extra hole on the right side of the fuselage and minus one passenger. That passenger was 62 year old Saul Binstock, a former jeweler/watch repairman from North Hollywood. Upon hearing about Saul being missing, his wife said he wasn't supposed to be on any plane. Guess the explosion part of the story didn't surprise her that much. One passenger noted Saul's extended time locked in the lavatory and was just about to have a stewardess investigate when a 'hell of a blast' ripped through the Convair 240. Just in time Mr Passenger. The plane was tested and dynamite was found as the cause of the 4 by 7 foot hole which Mr Binstock used as a chuteless egress point to where his body was found, sans 3 fingers from his left hand the next day. According to doctors, Saul was in good health and accountants said his finances were good. He was certainly a lucky man as one of his last purchases was for a pair of life insurance policies at the Burbank Airport. Considering what happened, that was money well spent indeed. Perplexing how we were greeted by life insurance vending machines in facilities which boast near perfect safety records. I want to buy some of the stuff for my next cab ride. But it was not to be smooth sailing for Eva Binstock (Saul's wife and insurance beneficiary) in the following years. The insurance company had a suicide exception clause and refused to make payments after her multiple demands for recompense. After all, it is just as likely that Saul discovered the bomb while he was in the lavatory and in the midst of using his watch repair skills to disarm the device, it went off, as it sensed a passenger was about to have a Stewardess investigate. But rather than view Saul as a hero for saving more than a dozen lives, he will be remembered as a person who was willing to obliterate 16 people in order for his spouse to receive $125,000. The world may never know the truth. Be that as it may, by 1960 the hole in the aircraft had grown to 40 square feet, Saul's jump from 7,500 feet to 10,000 and the bereft Mrs Binstock was forced to sue the insurance company for what was rightly her benefits. Hard to believe such sophisticated worms prowled the planet back then. Equally surprising was how the story morphed from one telling to the next in various newspapers which should occupy the neutral territory of information dissemination. I have not discovered the outcome of Mrs Binstock's legal proceedings which have a sort of "Hey, isn't that criminal?" patina that arrives via common sense rather than legal expertise. If I was in her position, I would hope the crew and passengers and their families find the capacity to some day understand how a person could act so irrationally; rather than pursue funds from an act which was designed to leave little evidence and no witnesses. But who was to blame for the explosion on Flight 39?

georger, In deference to your use and consumption of Clamato I found another anachronistic invention which baffles me to an even greater degree than the commercial pre-mixing of tomato and clam juices. That being the Coleman portable (not mobile) toilet which boasts utility 'on long car trips'. Car trips?!?? Not van or campers but cars. Although it would probably be a rush to use while elevated in the seat and surrounded by glass. The very thought of a vacation so tightly scheduled that an extra toilet break would be of too great an impact, holds less appeal than traveling with the half filled device in the first place. The engineering department at Coleman found some wisdom in designing the 'privy' with a 2.8 gallon 'holding' tank combined with a 3.2 gallon (???) fresh water tank. My skill in physics is pretty limited and geometry even worse but I'll give it a try. A 2.8 gallon holding tank (1) is 0.4 gallons smaller than the 3.2 gallon water supply (a). Toilets are generally used to deposit and transfer 'material of limited value' (2) and would have some volume greater than zero (b). OK then, a-1=0.4 gallons surplus water which will flow out of the portable toilet +b (the volume of the final variable). How can I solve for number (2)? If that isn't strange enough, this convenience also has accessories. Coleman part number 827-231T is a package of seat protectors for your portable loo. After all, you never know who's used it before and men are notorious for leaving the seat up. Better safe than sorry, so stock up and stay sanitary. That reminds me, I forgot to consider seat protectors and TP in the above equation so that would factor in with 2 sub b. Or is this making things too complicated? 2b or not 2b, that is the question.

The very nature of research makes for a frustrating experience in the best of environments. History compliments this dis-service by being written in a linear, easy to digest format that still baffles the average person. The weather was 'bad' on Thanksgiving eve for example. This conjures up hundreds of visions based upon a persons experience with 'bad weather'. In International Falls, MN that may have to include zero visibility, temps deep into double digits below 0 degrees F and 30 knot winds. Palm Springs, CA may define bad weather as conditions which require light to moderate hair spray to maintain the mid morning coiffing. Research would require, 9:00 PM PST, 37 degrees F, light precip in the form of rain, less than 0.5 inches in the past 24 hours, surface winds (PDX) 220/15 G30, broken overcast, etc. From the preceding baseline of information 'Charlie' a person could attempt to model....whatever. But kindly reference your work as in the WX report from 9 PM that evening. The much, much, much more common approach is to arrive with a solution looking for a problem to solve. Examples are plentiful on the higher numbered cable channels late into the night. Combination spoon/strainers, mechanical egg crackers and fully automatic salad guns capable of producing enough roughage for the crew of an aircraft carrier in mere seconds are but a few examples of this approach. D B Cooper has been no exception. MY suspect (show ownership, always) is D B Cooper because.....(fill with anything, because it does not matter).......and here is the proof (validation about what did not matter in the first place)....and here is were I found differing reports (these will ALWAYS fill the holes in the initial logic filters).....but the government is too stupid or crooked to do anything (cover story for why this information is ignored). Perhaps there has been some different approaches in the past, I'm too thick to find any examples. I have worked many years in R&D and think the name should be changed to F&R (fail and return) because that is what you will spend 99.99999% of your time cataloging then moving on to the next probability or possibility. Anyone that claims they discovered something in a dream, on their first attempt or as a non-accident is probably a liar or will admit to being the Emperor of Bakersfield in due time. Open forums are as valuable as any club without admissions (training, dues, certification). What is the $35,000 initiation fee really for? To make sure the members won't have to suffer around those of lower incomes. Ham radio requires licensing and federal oversight to make sure the airwaves are not jammed with endless, unintelligible babel or wide band jamming. If you want to do that......well, that's what the internet is for and the output should not surprise anyone who is aware if the input.

georger, My old man had a 70 or 80 foot tower for his rig that was a nuisance magnet for miles. First, these people must ALWAYS approach you while you are latched at the top of the tower and discuss every nuance of what you are doing. Of course they can't seem to hear your responses like 'I'm busy right now, I'll be down in a few hours'. Nope, never - it turns into an insta-crusade in which they call every agency that has a phone and report how you gave them a 'probe' in their sleep. On woman had my old man drive over to her house so he could see how his antenna was messing up her TV programs. Ah ha!! right there see, she would excitedly point to the screen as it flashed and modulated some voice harmonics. My dad would try to explain 'lady, how could that be me if I'm standing right here rather than transmitting CW on an HF frequency?' She responded with an unblinking stare. My dad went to the car and grabbed an RF filter for her antenna and installed it free of charge to keep her quiet if not make her happy. 'I find it strange that you would make such a repair so quickly if you had nothing to do with my TV being messed up' she said. 'Your welcome' was his response and we drove home not saying a word to each other. My father defeated from a lifetime of dealing with such people and I with the fresh realization that such people even existed.

I've learned video taping certain things makes sense on paper but fall short when viewed later. I had some friends over to watch my video with a perfect arch, I was truly in rare form. Silver helmet with 'Captain Kill' hand painted across the side and a brand new pair of boots; you could still smell the leather. Then the obligatory, yeee....hawww.....wahhh......whooooo, while struggling not to lose control. This inevitably leads to a less than focused moment while I'm grabbing around before main release. Who's the fat chick? Man you make a funny face. It sure doesn't take long, blah, blah, blah. So that was the last time I was video taped having sex. I went on to show them some video of skydivers from California City. Who's the fat chick? Man they make funny faces. It sure doesn't last long. Yep, no denying it; skydivers from California City look like me having sex. Just another burden I've learned to live with all these years.

snowman, You're right about the Kents, 11. Highest free fall of any micro-filtered tobacco product to be consumed in the USSR. 12. Validated power line skydiver attraction paradigm.

Thought I would craft a quick homage to the single greatest skydiver.....ever. Has he been mentioned on DZ.com? Not as far as I can tell.....gee....why? This man has numerous records which remain intact after nearly a half century and not a single acknowledgement to his jump. I'm of course typing about one Francis Gary Powers....where's the love? But what records could I be referring to? Set your faces to stunned: 1. Highest altitude reached by a Mercury space suit without a rocket ship. 2. Greatest distance between launch site and DZ. 3. Highest altitude any pilot, jumpmaster and skydiver combination have reached (70,0000 feet). 4. Only skydiver expected to 'do it' in their pants before a jump. 5. Only free fall qualified for frequent flyer miles (13). 6. Highest, ejection seat assisted jump. 7. Longest jail time for unauthorized use of a DZ (18 months). 8. Only skydiver expected to commit suicide 'after' a world record jump. 9. Only skydiver traded for a Russian spy. 10. Only skydiver worth trading. Well, it's only a few months till the 50th anniversary of this legendary jump and what better dais to acknowledge this than the D B Cooper thread which does not have a single thing to do with skydiving. OOOOooo Rah!!

snowman, Sparky represents the ultimate in personal ambivalence. He's not so much a loser as he is plain stupid and ungrateful. With 9,500 posts he complains about 16,000 on a thread??? Yes, I know some losers who are actually intelligent. Sparky does not understand the nature of free services on the internet. He thinks he gets free TV from the local channels. Not that three mediocre broadcast mediums compelled him to purchase a TV and install some god awful contraption on the roof of his single wide. As you know, most web sites are driven by revenue from members dues or advertising. Well 'ol Sparky likes what's free so you know he hasn't thrown down for membership on DZ.com, nosir. Sooooooo must be those advertising dollars which support such a site. Pretty simple to figure out if your head is out your donkey. Your also aware that many advertisers use a 'click' count to measure product exposure and place a value on the advertising. Soooo, the threads with the highest view counts generate the most money for the web site. Even if the subject has nothing to do with skydiving. Hey, Sparky would be a good example, over 9,000 posts. You know each and every one of those is a religious nugget solely about the art of skydiving. In all likelihood a view count will generate the same revenue for DZ.com if it is about skydiving or the last guy you gave herpes to. I think that last sentence was redundant. Like I said, I'm ambivalent about the Sparkies in the world. I hate being around them, not just because of the smell of stale urine but I feel I lose a few IQ points with every word they utter. On the other hand, easy sales to people of such limited intellect have made me a very wealthy man indeed.

Tosaw has some file in his estate which retells the account of Mr and Mrs Un-named from Mill Plain Rd (Main St), Vancouver, WA where they observe some light source (unknown type) fall or drift or float (unknown mode) from a south bound (known direction), jet (not turbo or recip) aircraft. Yet Tosaw did not publish this report. Why? Then Mr and Mrs Name-withheld contact the FBI (not police or sheriff) where a suspicious vehicle arrives and one person stays inside (Won the coin toss) while another (who shows NO ID, even though they just called the FBI) knocks on the door (didn't ring bell) and listens to the intelligent, logical and un-emotive occurrences form the night previous. The wife describes in painful detail (like her Elvis sightings) exactly what was observed after the 6 o'clock news and 3 tall boys. After explaining how she has made hundreds of reports to the FBI, CIA and National Enquirer but her victim-esque observations are always suppressed by these Fascist, bully boys, the 'agent' becomes upset (without reason) and tells her to 'Shut the FU&* UP.' This screams the end of the world as we know it, yet I feel........

377, That's the point about all this newly minted lore. It's like eating a hot dog, I can enjoy it if I don't think about it too much. Scuba Divers sucked into air tankers, workers entombed in Hoover Dam and Vegas drunks having their kidneys removed makes for a great laugh until you find the story teller is dead serious. When challenged or lightly questioned they always launch into how it happened to a friends cousin or they seen it themselves. My what a cheap commodity personal dignity has become. A few years ago I was trying to buy a garage door and install it myself. Yes, I enjoy manual labor. Well, the salesman tells me it has to be done by a 'professional' as the torsion spring could rip off a hand. Of course he went on to say, "Seen it many times". Wow, hyperbole and demagoguery in the same breath; a personal favorite. For many people, logic is like that song "I'm a Henry the 8th", you know...next verse, same as the first....a whole lot louder and a little bit worse. I remember reading about a product liability case where an old couple discovered a piece of latex or rubber in a loaf of bread. They filed a complaint with the health department stating the unsanitary conditions at the bakery where a condom!! could end up in a bakery product. What else is there to do while waiting for the muffins to cool? Grab yer partner and get a 'lil sumthin sumthin while rolling in the dough. In the heat of passion you may well lose that male barrier contraception in a freshly kneaded bun. Life has risks. Now the county has lawyers and scientists investigating this den of Donuts and debauchery searching for the scene of the crime and the sickos who get their jollys by feeding the unsuspecting public slightly used party favors. As it turns out, the 'condom' was a part of a disposable glove (small finger) that the workers used to insure a sanitary kitchen. Isn't that ironic? And embarrassing. What self respecting man would see a rubber glove finger (pinky) and think.....I'll just bet you that's a condom....same material and size of the ones I use. Yep, there he was with his wife on the first page of the metro section of the paper. Beautifully framed were the couple, the bread and the offending device before the results of the investigation were published. What a way to spend your 15 minutes of fame. These are the type of people who are always looking for such situations and always the people who find them. Hey, what's that on the French Onion Soup? What are those guys doing in the kitchen? Martha...get the health department on the phone again.

The money was black as a result of some form of combustion (not necessarily a flare) which occurred from 10,000 MSL to contact with the Columbia River? This slays me. I throw a magazine into the fireplace and it will never burn with such consistent margins and that is while laying on a bed of coals. I found myself considering Duane's 'under canopy welding' more likely. If the money was found with a jar of Witch Hazel would all of the suspects suddenly become known for their raging cases of hemorrhoids? This seems to be standard fare for Cooper discovery. A six inch plastic placard was discovered. A small bundle of money was discovered. Even a human body was discovered while searching for Cooper, but not a single brief case fragment or charred battery to be found. Give me a photo of some black money and an undocumented report of aircraft which jettisons 'something' with an eerie glow, un-earthly like nuthin' me or the Mrs. haz ever sawed since. It landed just over that rise, property owners don't like people jumping the fence to have a look-see; I reckon they wuz threatened by the government. If-in you wuz to ask them about it they will deny any knowledge about the lights what had fallen from that jet and landing in their field. Just shows you what sort of unimaginable tortures they was fixin to get if they ever told a soul. I was told when they first found the brief case is was still smoldering and glowing with an unnatural iridescence which pulsed and radiated a low tone. Rumor has it, a disembodied hand was still clutching the handle. That limb no doubt torn free from the shock induced by jumping from the air-stairs of a B-727; at least that's what one of the investigating agents told me in the strictest of confidence. So I wouldn't expect much in the way of documentation. That's the way this case has always been, you know - a 'Plate of Shrimp'.

So Cooper the grizzled veteran of combat has planned to huck flares out the tail cone of a 727 like a C-130 evading heat seeking missiles. Versus wearing some passive IR goggles searching for his DZ. His accomplice could have strategically placed IR strobes which would not be noticed by people on the ground and placed in a pattern Cooper would easily recognize. Nope too easy.

Orange1 corrects Farflung- "It's not a dialect, it's a language, and while there are about 8 million who speak it at home there are probably at least 50-60 million, if not 100-million or more people who understand Xhosa." Farflung quotes self - "Spotting anachronisms has never been a national strength."

snowman, Those unknown explosions which create oft witnessed mushroom clouds have long held me transfixed. From the earlier productions of 'The Day the Earth Stood Still' and 'The Blob' which inspired me to poke things with a stick that I did not understand. To atomic sized ants on a man eating quest for sugar cubes in 'Them', made nuclear energy seem a worrisome technology for sure. Then came the 'Wasp Woman' and 'Attack of the 50 Foot Woman' with Susan Cabot who could sting me anytime and Allison Hayes at 50 feet was worth the climb and just in time for puberty. Hey, this atomic thing wasn't all bad. Spotting anachronisms has never been a national strength. Giant ants clearly would not have the mandible dexterity to handle something the size of a sugar cube. Additionally would anyone believe men would actually run away from a 50 foot woman after crashing their car? I didn't think so. Many years later I'm cruising the country side of central Kansas being all cool and hunky while passing a billboard for the 'Largest Atomic Cannon.' This had it all, the word Atomic, a cannon and no doubt, some pictures of things that blowed up real good. Man 'O man, along with the 'Deepest Hand Dug Well' and 'Oldest Continuously Operating Light Bulb in a Freestanding, Public Structure' I had to see this thing. After looking over the Atomic super gun I asked where the main attraction was located. You know, the cannon which should draw the most ooohhhhs and aahhhhs.....that's right, the World's SMALLEST Atomic Cannon. Launching a nuclear weapon from a huge artillery piece may excite the less educated but I knew full well, the guys operating the smallest atomic cannon had the largest stones. Blank stares of disbelief from the sort of confusion generated when one speaks Esperanto or that African dialect comprised of clicks and smacking sounds. But it was on that grassy knoll that I vowed one day to discover the source of the smallest atomic cannon. Here decades later I have managed to move no closer to that goal. Calls to other atomic cannon display sites have curators and docents happily informing me they have the largest (insert qualifier) cannon. Damn it, will I ever know?

It was a dark and stormy night (cue thunder claps). It was cold enough to freeze a man solid within three minutes and the smallest amount of moisture cause a canopy to remain inside the backpack. Horrible, un-survivable, sleet driven by winds in excess of 100 miles per hour churned over the vast towering stands of coniferous forest like sentinels on constant guard reminding man just how delicate of a hold he has on life. Thick roiling cloud layers over a quarter mile in depth writhed in a hypnotic pattern which promised certain death to those foolish enough to penetrate their margins with flimsy flying machines. Just the type of meteorological conditions which many a seasoned pilot has had to face while steadily illuminating the 'Fasten Seat Belt/ No Smoking' sign and suspending beverage service. Well, that's the sort of hyperbole I've read involving the weather conditions on Cooper-ween. Now there are people who can identify a south bound (and up) aircraft which has jettisoned some sort of flaming debris. My suspension of disbelief is high enough to give me an intellectual wedgie. Now there are numerous citizens scanning the night skies on a day which must have been quite pleasant and relatively cloud free (cue Theremin for that pulsating sound associated with creepy stuff in B movies). Stay tuned for next weeks episode of 'I was a Teenage D B', where we will find the Trinity explosion was a mere distraction from the 'Real Secrets' the government was hiding. Will citizens finally feel safe in their own homes? Does pleasant weather exist in the PNW? If Obama is our 44th President why is one missing? Is this missing Prez the long hidden government secret and the true D B Cooper? (cue 'Dum Dee Dum Dum' from Dragnet). Will this long national nightmare finally come to an end? What about the children? Under the advise of attorney, we absolutely cannot disclose any of this information but oddly will reveal the government will soon be exposed in malfeasance of Titanic proportions without concern for personal safety or linear thought. Stay tuned.

There is a great deal of weight given an individual that matches the composite. I've read comparisons of ears and nose structure where after a while I got the impression the composite was a photograph. Would I be a person who let a bias enter my recall of an individual? No way. Let me give you an example; I once dated a woman who looked exactly like Raquel Welch (start drawing), only a little shorter. According to internet sources Raquel is 5' 6" which would place my former acquaintance at some altitude below that, perhaps 5' 3" to as much as 5' 4 or 4.5" at most, no more than that (how's the sketch?). Her eyes were brown (just like Raquel's) and her hair was just a little darker. That should be more than enough detail for a neck up rendering anyway....if you know what I mean (insert self aggrandizing chuckle). Attached are some examples of composites next to their subjects. Perhaps it is in the eye of the beholder but I would not consider these composites a great aid in identifying a person. Except for my mini Raquel.

377, I'm not sure if Larry communicated directly with the FAA but he was in contact with ATC via his CB rig. http://www.markbarry.com/lawnchairman.html Half way down the page you will see a wav file for The Lawn Chair Pilot (18:25). It is pretty amusing to hear Larry getting scolded by his girlfriend and explaining to some official his launch site location. Never thought he was a Cooper suspect but in the same category of non-existant flights or jumps.