Damn lawyers

[akarunway 1]

Subject: Lawyers and grandmas

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand.

He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?" She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, andyou manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?" She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state, not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him." The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and in a very quiet voice said, "If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair."
















--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

[jgoose71 0]

I have to agree with the joke in this case. Judges are just lawyers who think they can use there position to be above the law.

"There is an art, it says, or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
Life, the Universe, and Everything

[Andy9o8 0]

Quote

I have to agree with the joke in this case. Judges are just lawyers who think they can use there position to be above the law.

Next time I do open mike night at the comedy club, I hope you're not in the audence.

[jgoose71 0]

Yea, not happy with the justice sytem right now.

Plus, I think I dropped my sence of humor somewhere over in the bonfire. I'll go see if I can find it

"There is an art, it says, or, rather, a knack to flying. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss."
Life, the Universe, and Everything

[itllclear 1]

Quote

Judges are just lawyers who think they can use there position to be above the law.

Quote

Judges are lawyers who couldn't make it in private practice but knew the Governor.

"Harry, why did you land all the way out there? Nobody else landed out there."

"Your statement answered your question."

• Quote

Share this post

---

Link to post

Share on other sites