tunaplanet 0 #1 December 5, 2003 MARINE ENTRANCE EXAM Time Limit: 3 Weeks Name: _____________________________ Signature: _____________________________ 1. What language is spoken in France? 2. Give a dissertation on the ancient Babylonian Empire with particular reference to architecture, literature, law and social conditions -OR- give the first name of Pierre Trudeau. 3. Would you ask William Shakespeare to? (check only one) ___ (a) build a bridge ___ (b) sail the ocean ___ (c) lead an army or ___ (D) WRITE A PLAY!!!! 4. What religion is the Pope? (check only one) ___ (a) Jewish ___ (b) Catholic ___ (c) Hindu ___ (d) Polish ___ (e) Agnostic ___ (f) Muslim ___ (g) Irish ___ (h) Buddhist ___ (i) Protestant ___ (j) Italian ___ (k) Southern Baptist 5. Metric conversion. How many feet is 0.0 meters? 6. What time is it when the big hand is on the 12 and the little hand is on the 5? 7. How many commandments was Moses given? (approximately) 8. What are people in America's far north called? (check only one) ___ (a) Westerners ___ (b) Southerners ___ (c) Northerners 9. Spell: Bush, Carter, and Clinton (please print) Bush : _________________________________________ Carter : _________________________________________ Clinton: _________________________________________ 10. Six kings of England have been called George, the last one being George the Sixth. Name the previous five: 11. Where does rain come from? (check only one) ___ (a) Macy's ___ (b) a 7-11 ___ (c) Canada ___ (d) the sky (clouds) 12. Can you explain Einstein's Theory of Relativity? (check only one) ___ (a) yes ___ (b) no 13. What are coat hangers used for? 14. The Star Spangled Banner is the National Anthem for what country? 15. Explain Le Chateliers Principle of Dynamic Equilibrium -OR- spell your name in BLOCK LETTERS (please print). 16. Where is the basement in a three story building located? 17. Which part of America produces the most oranges (check only one)? ___ (a) New York ___ (b) Florida ___ (c) Canada ___ (d) Wisconsin 18. Basic Math. If you have three apples, how many apples do you have? 19. What does NBC (National Broadcasting Corporation) stand for? 20. The Cornell University tradition for efficiency began when (approximately)? ___ (a) B.C. ___ (b) A.D. 21. What Does the NAVY do? (check only one) ___ (a) Sail the seven seas and play with inflatable dolls ___ (b) Haul Marines to various fight locations around the world! 22. Who is the current President of the United States of America? (check only one) ___ (a) Usama bin Laden ___ (b) Jimmy Carter ___ (c) Ronald Reagan ___ (d) General George C, Patton ___ (e) Adolf Hitler ___ (f) GEORGE W. BUSH 23. Where do most Marines receive their basic training? (check only one) ___ (a) The White House ___ (b) Camp David ___ (c) Disneyland ___ (d) Nixon's Library ___ (e) Watergate Hotel ___ (f) Santa's Lodge at the North Pole ___ (g) Parris Island South Carolina 24. Joining the Marines is better than: ___ (a) Joining the Army, Air Force, Coast Guard, or Navy ___ (b) Having SEX 25. You are in a Bar and someone insults the Marine Corp., YOU should: ___ (a) Go home immediately and tell your Mother ___ (b) Follow tradition and kick the crap out of them 26. As a Marine you will be expected to: ___ (a) Die for your country ___ (b) Call your mommy when you get hurt 27. There are three (3) branches to the United States Government, they are (check only one): ___ (a) Executive, Legislative, and Judicial ___ (b) Army, Navy, Marines ___ (c) White, Black, and Hispanic ___ (d) Protestant, Jewish, and Catholic 28. D.I. stands for (check only one): ___ (a) Drill Instructor ___ (b) Dickwad Inventor ___ (c) Down In ___ (d) D-Day Invasion 29. Advanced Math: You have one pound of Grapes. How many pounds of grapes do you have? 30. My Sexual Preference Is: ___ (a) Heterosexual (straight as an arrow and true blue) ___ (b) Bi-Sexual (I do both males and females) ___ (c) Gay (queer as a 3-dollar bill and twice as horny) ___ (d) I am straight but willing to learn various butt fucking and blow job techniques. 31. If I am masturbating, then I am: ___ Jerking Off ___ Playing with my Wang ___ Straightening My Pole ___ Flexing my lower muscles 32. Shit Packing is for: ___ Queers ___ Babes who like it up the ass 33. Underage Girls and Marines mean: ___ (a) Trouble ___ (b) Angry Fathers ___ (c) Shotgun Weddings ___ (d) Statutory Rape Charges unless your in the deep south ___ (e) All of the above 34. There are only two things that come from Oklahoma, Steers and Queers: ___ I agree ___ I do not agree 35. In war, I must (check as many as apply): ___ Kill the enemy, my creed will be one shot, one kill ___ Yell out, "Hey ya all want to surrender?" ___ Take NO Prisoners, kill them all, let God sort them out later Test Notations: * You must correctly answer five (5) or more questions to qualify. * If you are stuck on any questions, you may ask the monitor for help. * Cheating is not tolerated but may be overlooked if YOU currently have the body of Arnold Schwarzenegger when he won the Mr. Universe Contest. * If you brought your dog or horse with you, please don't bring it into the test room, tie it up outside. Important Test Note: We would appreciate it if you would NOT masturbate during the test. Forty-two Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CrazyIvan 0 #2 December 6, 2003 __________________________________________ Blue Skies and May the Force be with you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crapflinger2000 1 #3 December 6, 2003 As we used to say about the Navy... "Navy: Sleep on your back, or someone else will!" __________________________________________________ What would Vic Mackey do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tunaplanet 0 #4 December 6, 2003 Oh no...thought those homosexual naval gay references died out like disco did..... Forty-two Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crapflinger2000 1 #5 December 6, 2003 Hey, they are as dead as the "dumb jarhead" post you started it with... if anyone is interested (I doubt it) I ain't homophobic in the least, believe it or not. Anyway... I met some fucking rocks in the Corps, no doubt. But I also met some of the smartest people in both the E and the O ranks... __________________________________________________ What would Vic Mackey do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TitaniumLegs 8 #7 December 6, 2003 That is humor. I recognize that. (>o|-< If you don't believe me, ask me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tunaplanet 0 #8 December 6, 2003 USMC = Uncle Sam's Misguided Children Forty-two Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crapflinger2000 1 #9 December 6, 2003 Also: USMC = "U Signed the Motherfucking Contract" (so stop fucking crying because it is cold and wet, prive..) USMC = "U Stole My Christmas" And yes, I do recognize the irony in the fact that "smart" Marines are substituting "U" for "You". __________________________________________________ What would Vic Mackey do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tunaplanet 0 #10 December 6, 2003 Well at least you served. That's make us brothers...well...step brothers I may talk tough about other branches, but I have nothing but respect for any fellow soldier...regardless of branch. Forty-two Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
