Puttin the rules out......

[f1freak 0]

From a guy's mind.....

1.Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us compla! ining about you leaving it down.

1.Sunday sports.
It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1.Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1.Crying is blackmail.

1.Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1.Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.


1.Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for! .


1.A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.
See a doctor.

1.Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become
null and void after 7 days.

1.If you won't dress like the
Victoria's! Secret girls,
don'texpect us to act like soap opera guys.


1.If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.


1.You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.


1.Whenever possible,
please say whatever you have to say during commercials.


1.Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1.ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example,
is a fruit, not a color.
Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

1.If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1.If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying,
but it is just not worth the hassle.


1.If you ask a question you do! n't
want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.


1.When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine...Really.


1.Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
discuss such topics as
baseball, the shotgun formation,
ormonster trucks.


1.You have enough clothes.


1.You have too many shoes.


1.I am in shape.
Round is a shape.


1.! Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know,
I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that?
It's like camping.

HAVE FUN...
...JUST DONT DIE

[kai2k1 0]

There's no truer sense of flying than sky diving," Scott Cowan

[dzdiva 7]

"It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..."

[aggie04 0]

***1.Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1.If something we said can be interpreted two ways
and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1.When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine...Really.

If only I had read this earlier...It is SO TRUE and I am slowly finding those out!! Made me laugh

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A life without a cause
is a life without an effect

[eeneR 1]

Quote

1.Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

Nope Have to chime in on this one...some guys dont handle that well either...they get all scared when you are forward and tell them the truth

She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway."
eeneR
TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto

[livendive 8]

Quote

From a guy's mind.....
1.You can either ask us to do something
or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.

I quote this one all the time in real life. It usually goes over like a lead balloon and I never care.

Quote

1.If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing,"
we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying,
but it is just not worth the hassle.

I give exactly one extra chance.

Quote

1.If you ask a question you do! n't
want an answer to,
expect an answer you don't want to hear.

My version is only slightly different, "Don't ask the question if you don't want to hear the answer."

Most of the rest are funny but oh so true.

Blues,
Dave

"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

[DrewGPM 0]

Quote

Nope Have to chime in on this one...some guys dont handle that well either...they get all scared when you are forward and tell them the truth

What are telling these poor guys?

If you tell the guy that you want him to buy you flowers and take you to a dinner and a movie...that shouldn't scare anyone off. If it does, that guy wasn't good enough for you anyway.

If you're telling him that what you want is to tie him to the bed, shove a ball gag in his mouth and put mouse traps on his scrotum and nipples...then i understand why they get a little scared.

[eeneR 1]

Quote

Quote

Nope Have to chime in on this one...some guys dont handle that well either...they get all scared when you are forward and tell them the truth

What are telling these poor guys?

If you tell the guy that you want him to buy you flowers and take you to a dinner and a movie...that shouldn't scare anyone off. If it does, that guy wasn't good enough for you anyway.

If you're telling him that what you want is to tie him to the bed, shove a ball gag in his mouth and put mouse traps on his scrotum and nipples...then i understand why they get a little scared.

God damnit Drew...I told you not to tell anyone

She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway."
eeneR
TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto

[DrewGPM 0]

at least i didn't mention the beads you put in my...uh, never mind

[eeneR 1]

Quote

at least i didn't mention the beads you put in my...uh, never mind

There ya go again....im gonna have to shut you up again I take it

She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway."
eeneR
TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto

[Mayberry 0]

Amen!!
Preach on brother!!

Don

Don

Here's to friends!

[Evelyn 0]

I got that same e-mail from my husband, and e-mailed him back saying I could relate to certain ones. He e-mailed me back saying "what do ya mean, they're all true!" Amazingly, we've been married 27 years!

Life is either a daring adventure or nothing ~ Helen Keller