Hipwrddude 0 #1 November 12, 2006 As a man of taste and distinction, I exercise discretion and tasteful selection when it comes to my yard ornaments... I like Cherubs. I have two cherubs out front. One boy, one girl. They’re cute. For dramatic effect one pisses into the other’s mouth. It's a great conversation piece. On the corner of the house is a German garden Gnome. He has a motion detector that triggers a one finger salute to passersby. My neighbor hasn’t complained yet. The bird bath sprays birds away. And they fly away never to have baby birds again. I don’t believe in Lawn Jockeys or Yardells. Mine is a rapper. He’s musically activated to break out a rap when people are near. During block parties the compliments roll in. Jealous, I got one for my black neighbors that looks like Eminem. Sometimes electrical disturbances cause them to rap at each other. I have an assortment of turtles, rabbits, ducks and frogs strewn about my landscaping. And they’re all wearing pantyhose. When people approach they make sexy cooing sounds. Some people have responded inappropriately. When that happens, they all start to coo and the assailant simply makes their getaway. My pink flamingo raises one leg and lights cigars. I also have some plastic fruit in the yard, and plastic people that try to eat them. When asked where I get the ideas for such elaborate landscaping architecture combining nature, anthropomorphic and animal statuettes, I say, “Hey, it’s just yard ornaments and shit.” You're always the starter in your own life! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SwampThing 0 #2 November 12, 2006 I like Cherubs. Quote Don't we all brother, don't we all! The Pessimist says: "It can't possibly get any worse!" The Optimist says: "Sure it can!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites shropshire 0 #3 November 12, 2006 The idea of my front garden devoid of mooning gnomes and assorted clothed statutes of dogs standing errect on hind legs, taking naked people for a walk on leads, just simply beggars belief. Surely every fashionable neighbourhood is so elegantly regaled? - Class will always out in the end. . (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites popsjumper 2 #4 November 12, 2006 Your pink flamingos are better...mine just stand there like a couple of idiots.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
shropshire 0 #3 November 12, 2006 The idea of my front garden devoid of mooning gnomes and assorted clothed statutes of dogs standing errect on hind legs, taking naked people for a walk on leads, just simply beggars belief. Surely every fashionable neighbourhood is so elegantly regaled? - Class will always out in the end. . (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #4 November 12, 2006 Your pink flamingos are better...mine just stand there like a couple of idiots.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
