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Hey all. Warning, long post ahead. TLDR; I'm a baby skydiver with 10 jumps, fresh out of AFF. All of my jumps went great and I love the feeling of skydiving, but at the same time, I'm always thinking about how afraid I am for my next jump even when I'm not at the DZ. I'm exhausted and I don't know if I can take the anxiety anymore. I'm not sure if I should accept that maybe skydiving isn't for me or if there's anything else I can do. Looking for any advice or personal experience to help me out! I came into skydiving from a unique background. I've worked at a tunnel for years so I had about 20 hours before I ever jumped out of an airplane. I did my first tandem last summer and absolutely fell in love. I felt like I'd come home and I knew straight away I needed to do it more. I saved up for my AFF over winter and quarantine and I finally started in July. It's been 5 weeks since my course started and I graduated 2 weeks ago, except I haven't done a jump since. The problem is that I'm terrified. I really struggled with anxiety all throughout my progression, couldn't eat, couldn't sleep, cold sweats, felt sick, the whole works. I could never really pin-point what exactly I'm afraid of. It's not door fear, or exiting, or free fall, or landing, or gear fear or any of that. Just this abstract, visceral fear. I somehow managed to finish and now the thought of doing my first real solo (that is, my first self-supervised jump) feels insurmountable. I'm terrified and for the first time I actually feel like I CAN'T do it. I was all geared up and manifested last week and I chickened out and took myself all of the load. I decided to take some time off to get my head sorted out and possibly come back to the sport next season, but I'm so embarrassed and disappointed with myself. I love jumping once I'm out of the plane. I love how surreal the free fall feels, I love flying my own canopy, I love landing. But I'm exhausted from feeling so scared all the time, and the thought of doing another jump fills me with dread and not excitement. I don't know what to do. I don't want to fully quit but at what point do I say "okay, this isn't for me." Does anyone have any advice, or did anyone else go through something similar?
Hi all, I started my AAF course yesterday and this morning i called to postpone my remaining jumps to tomorrow. I am worried that i still don't have the feeling and power back in my left arm. At the first jump already, i felt numbness on my left thumb and index finger. Didnt think much about it as i thought it happened because of the cold air. Every jump it did, it got a bit worse but still not a big obstacle. At my 4th jump yesterday, after opening my parachute, i started to lose some feeling om my left arm. Is still grabbed my steering lines and landed safely. The moment i landed, i realized that my left arm is totally numb now. I had a hard time picking up the parachute using my left arm. It is the same feeling you have when you sleep on your arm and wake up on it. At the hangar when I grabbed my stuff and phone, I realized is lost coordination with my hand and fingers, making typing difficult. I dont want to skip any more days tbh to get my license. Today i called in that i wanted one day rest. What would your advise be about continuing tomorrow? As every jump made it a bit worse, i am worried that i will have total numbness in the air and have struggles steering, god forbid keep balance in the air. What my question is: Is it something common? I want to be responsible with this of course and personally I would go tomorrow and finish the course. Just to get an insight from more experienced people on here. My instructor didnt think much about it yesterday after i told him. After opening and landing, my vision was fine and i didnt feel dizzy or anything. Only numbness specifically on my left arm. Right arm is fine. I thought about the harness and the only place I do preffer it to be tight are my legs. Would loosing up the straps be more helpfull? Thanks.
AFF students general performance
Duvain posted a topic in General Skydiving DiscussionsOk I JUST GRADUATED AFF!! While I’m excited, I’m curious about how stable students/new skydives are generally? I took all AFF after I passed wind tunnel bellyfly, but I kinda remembered the feeling of my first 2min in tunnel... not quite joyful... I watched YouTube AFF videos. Some are stable as hell while the rest kicked out of balance, so not sure about what instructors generally expect to go through...
ACLR with Cadaver, will I ever fly again?
Pawwwla posted a question in Questions and AnswersHello everyone, I am very, very new to this sport, I've had 2 tandems and 2 solos in April and then, bam, tore my acl on a trampoline. Currently I am 3 months post with a cadaver graft and itching to get out there. I wanted to try a tandem but both the PT and doc say no.....so my plan is to wait the full 9 months and start over with ground school in March. So my question to you all is, with those of you with knee injury how do you deal with landings (I was terrified of the landing before my injury) And the bigger question will I every be able to jump again?