wlie 0 #1 October 17, 2002 A young man named Jon received a parrot as a gfit. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird's mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. Jon tried and tried to change the bird's attitude by consistenlty saying only polite words, playing soft music and anything else he could think of to "clean up" the bird's vocabulary. Finally Jon was fed up and he yelled at the parrot. The parrot yelled back. Jon shook the parrot and the parrot got even angrier and more rude. Jon in desperation, threw up his hands and grabbed the bird and put him in the freezer. For a few minutes the parrot squawked and kicked and screamed. Then, suddenly there was total quiet, not a peep was heard. Fearing that he hurt the parrot, Jon quickly opened the door to the freezer. The parrot calmly stepped out onto Jon's outstretched arm and said I believe I may have offended you with my rude language and actions. I am sincerely remorseful for any inappropriate transgressions. I fully intend to do everything I can do to correct my rude and unforgivable behavior". Jon was stunned at the change in the bird's attitude. He was about to ask the parrot why he had made such a dramatic change in his behavior, but the bird continued..."May I ask what the chicken did?"My other ride is the relative wind. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #2 October 17, 2002 A deaf mute walks into a pharmacy to buy condoms. He has difficulty communicating with the pharmacist and can't see condoms on the shelf. Frustrated, the deaf mute finally unzips his pants, places his member on the counter and puts down a five dollar bill next to it. The pharmacist unzips his pants, puts his manhood on the counter just as the deaf mute did, then picks up both bills and stuffs them in his pocket. Exasperated, the deaf mute begins to curse the pharmacist wildly in sign language. "Look," the pharmacist says, "if you can't afford to lose, you shouldn't bet." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites