jraf 0 #26 November 9, 2002 OK I shall try it now (walking towards refrigerator and making sure the shorts don't bite again) Ouch! No! No!/ Let go! Ouch(returning in great haste) Whoow! It took the wiskey away from me and hit me several times with a bottle of OJ. And its dinking my booze. Now what do I do? (weeping, curled in a corner)jraf Me Jungleman! Me have large Babalui. Muff #3275 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #27 November 9, 2002 Well, first, let it get really drunk on the bottle of whiskey. Then, get your windproof lighter, and then sneak up on it (it would be best to wear sneakers for this. That's what sneakers are for...sneaking)...open the fridge door - I assume the light in your fridge has burned out - all the best if that's so - but if not, it's o.k. too 'cause light is it's nemesis; croon sweet nothings to is as you gently take the OJ away - it'll be too drunk to fight you off. Also, while you're at the fridge, take out the steak, take it out of the package, and set it on the counter. Then, once you have disarmed the penicillin from the sweet sugary oj, pick it up (the blue stuff, not the oj) and throw it, as hard as you can, on the ground at your feet. This will do two things...a) it will be really drunk so it won't hurt it, but it will stun it...and b) if you do it correctly, your leg will be in position to get the splatter of it, and get medicated that way. Lastly, take your lighter and set fire to your kitchen. It will act like the flame thrower thingies in the movies, and will char the unused portion of your drunk blue fuzzy stuff into oblivion. If you have placed the steak carefully on the counter, you will also now have a charbroiled dinner waiting for you. While it may singe the counter a little bit, it also serves to sterilize the area, so you have a clean place to cook. While the blue fuzzy remnants are still on your leg, do please hobble off to the bathroom, get some toilet paper, and place it over the blue fuzzy stuff - you already know how to do this - it works on the same principal you count on when you shave. Then go back to the kitchen, grab the steak, and have dinner. Voila! Kill two birds with one stone - dinner and cleaning your kitchen. Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jraf 0 #28 November 9, 2002 Why have I not thought of that!!! Question though: what do I do with the little white worms living in the steak. Do I eat them before or after the kitchen incineration? I don't want them to loose all their nutritional values.jraf Me Jungleman! Me have large Babalui. Muff #3275 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #29 November 9, 2002 Quotewhat do I do with the little white worms living in the steak. Do I eat them before or after the kitchen incineration? After, silly! I mean, really. Haven't you ever seen outdoor survival skills on tv? It's only when you're in the garden do you eat them raw. Cooking them crisp is like having a side dish of fried, well, maggots. Besides, aged beef has the best flavor, wouldn't you agree? Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bobsled92 0 #30 November 9, 2002 Well, I started riding when I was 4.(Just stopped 3months ago) Had a girl friend and she smoked.(most dangerou$ part of my life) I think Skydiving is the cheapest & safest thing in my life to this day._______________________________ If I could be a Super Hero, I chose to be: "GRANT-A-CLAUS". and work 365 days a Year. http://www.hangout.no/speednews/ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #31 November 10, 2002 "I'm a friend of yours, right? " Of course. Anyone who puts up with my obnoxious moments has to be an especially cool person. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
