Joke: 18 year old girl impregnated

[SuperKat 0]

Sound Parenting

An eighteen-year-old girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for two months.

Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant.

Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"

The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a Ferrari stops in front of their house; a mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and enters the house.

He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and tells them, "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. However, I can't marry her because of my personal family situation, but I'll take charge.

“If a girl is born I will bequeath her 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beach villa and a $1,000,000 bank account.

“If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $2,000,000 bank account.

“If it is twins, a factory and $1,000,000 each.

“However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"

At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him, "Then you try again."

What's the most you ever lost in a coin toss, Friendo?

[Hipwrddude 0]

Ah Nico man, what a stinker of a joke! That was a Scud missile! Here ya go:
Three boyscouts out on a camping trip were in a tent in their sleeping bags talking about the frigid winter. The first one starts: "Man, I was in weather that was so cold, when I took a pee it froze as soon as it came out and I had to pee walking backwards!" Not to be outdone, the second one replied, "That's nuthin'! I was in weather that was so cold when I breathed my breath froze in front of my face and I kept bumping into ice crystals!" Hearing this, the third one threw the gloves off: "You dudes know nothing about cold weather! I was in weather so cold, (chorus "How cold was it?") I mean this weather was so cold, that, like, I was shivering in my sleeping bag and felt something cold by my foot, I didn't know what it was, so I reached down and pulled it out. It was brown, frosty and gave me freezerburn so I threw it in the fire and it went (makes farting sound.)

You're always the starter in your own life!