kenz 0 #1 March 3, 2007 to say goodbye to a best friend... it really is true that you can never really prepare yourself - but any advice on getting through it?"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydiveStMarys 0 #2 March 3, 2007 Is this "goodbye" as in...funeral or something else? BobbiA miracle is not defined by an event. A miracle is defined by gratitude. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kenz 0 #3 March 3, 2007 goodbye as in funeral to come very soon - got the call today to come as soon as possible to say my farewells - not dealing well at all edited to add: just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been such a huge support - i am only happy that lauras suffering will be ending soon, but my heart aches as she is like a sister to me - i almost think the anticipation is making this harder for me to deal with - but i know its for the better... god bless"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydiveStMarys 0 #4 March 3, 2007 What you added when you did the edit thingy is what you need to keep in mind. No matter how cliche it may sound, she will be better off, MUCH better off. Yeah it would be really cool if things worked out completely different, but it didn't and thats life. As sucko as it maybe, we can't change it. I think maybe the most important thing that you can do is to tell her, or maybe you have already done this, how much you love her, how much you appreciated her friendship and that your life would not have been complete with out her love and friendship. Let her know that you will miss her, but you will not let her memory die. You just may want to write these things and more down on a piece of paper and slip it into her pocket or into the casket, so she will have the blessings of your friendship forever...goodbye, depending on your views may not be the right words..maybe something like, see you on the other side, enjoy your new journey save me a seat, etc... BobbiA miracle is not defined by an event. A miracle is defined by gratitude. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #5 March 3, 2007 Oh Kenzie, I'm so sorry. No matter how many times I go through this, I'll never know how to prepare/be. Just know that your presence and love will be felt.Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #6 March 3, 2007 Quotegoodbye as in funeral to come very soon - got the call today to come as soon as possible to say my farewells - not dealing well at all edited to add: just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has been such a huge support - i am only happy that lauras suffering will be ending soon, but my heart aches as she is like a sister to me - i almost think the anticipation is making this harder for me to deal with - but i know its for the better... god bless Oh dang. Honey I'm sorry. I was in that position a few years ago and I...well let's just say I think I did what I had to to allow for others to have their time. I gave up the chance to give that last hug, but honest to God, I don't know if I could have if I had walked in the door instead of dropping off a present and walking away... I have been getting the emails about Laura and I am just so sorry...I didn't see a recent one that said that she was getting worse this quickly. I am sorry to hear it. I wish I could say something profound, but all I can offer is my heartfelt hugs and prayers. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
karenmeal 0 #7 March 3, 2007 I'm really sorry to hear that she isn't going to get better. I've been hoping to hear a different kind of update. I hope that you get to see her again to say goodbye. Just be honest with her and tell her how much she means to you. I've never had to say goodbye to someone in that circumstance. With one close friend I just wish that I had had the chance to talk with him before he died. I would have just told him that I loved him, and looked up to him and that he made a profound impression on my life. Then I would have hugged him and I wouldn't have let go until he realized how much his life was really worth. Edited to add: My advice for getting through it, do something positive that can help take your mind off of it. When my buddy died, a group of us focused our attention on helping out another friend who had just lost him mom (he was also good friends with the guy that died). We cleaned his house while we was gone at her funeral, cooked him lots of nice dinners that we froze for him to use when he wanted it, we built him a work bench in his garage and built him the bed-frame that he'd been meaning to get around to building. It was good for us all to just focus on being nice to someone else who was worse off than we were. "Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kenz 0 #8 March 3, 2007 thanks you guys - i appreciate all of your words - i know she is better off but it doesnt make it hurt any less even though i really want it to... i feel extremely fortunate to have been able to be there as much as i have - and even luckier that i get the opportunity to say goodbye - because most do not - she will not be conscious but i know she'll be listening - in fact before i got the call today, i told my bf on monday she was gone - i think the only reason she'll be alive this weekend is so that people do have the chance to say their farewells... to anyone that knew her it is impossible for her not to have left her mark on them... i love her more than anything and just hope her journey is peaceful... thanks again guys - i'll probably be in hiatus for a while but again your support means more than you know"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gene03 0 #9 March 3, 2007 From my own experience, there is no way you can prepare yourself. The best you can do is love the heck out of that person, keep your chin up, put on your happy face. Yes, I know it doesn't fit well in these circumstances, do the best you can. After the fact, thank the Creator with all your heart for blessing you with her friendship. Continue with your life until the hollow-hearted, wooden, useless, everyday stuff becomes real to you again. And above all... forgiveness. Some people just can't get over the fact that someone just up on dies on them depriving them of their friendship. It takes time. Go through the motions until the feelings come back into your life. My compassion and heart is with you.“The only fool bigger than the person who knows it all is the person who argues with him. Stanislaw Jerzy Lec quotes (Polish writer, poet and satirist 1906-1966) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GravityJunky 0 #10 March 3, 2007 With my deepest sympathy...Sorry to hear about your loss, sweetie! It's never easy letting go. Hope's these lyrics, help you to at least understand you're not alone, we all feel this way, under these circumstances! God Bless! Kenz Sincerely Kad~ -------------------- Through the back window of our '59 wagon I watched my best friend Jamie slipping further away I kept on waving till I couldn't see her And through my tears I asked again why we couldn't stay Mama whispered softly time will ease your pain Life's about changing nothing ever stays the same And she said how can I help you to say goodbye... it's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry Come let me hold you and I will try... how can I help you to say goodbye I sat on our bed he packed his suitcase, I held a picture of our wedding day. His hands were trembling, we both were crying He kissed me gently... and then he quickly walked away. I called up mama and she said... time will ease your pain. Life's about changing nothing ever stays the same. And She said how can I help you... To say goodbye... it's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry. Come let me hold you and I will try... how can I help you to say goodbye Sitting with mama alone in her bedroom She opened her eyes and then she gently squeezed my hand. She said I have to go now my time here is over. And with her final words she tried to help me understand Mama whispered softly... Time will ease your pain. Life's about changing nothing ever stays the same. And she said how can I help you to say goodbye... it's okay to hurt and it's okay to cry Come let me hold you and I will try... how can I help you to say goodbye. By Artist :Patty Loveless Album "Only What I Feel"*My Inner Child is A Fucking Prick Too! *Everyones entitled to be stupid but you are abusing the priviledge *Well I'd love to stay & chat, But youre a total Bitch! {Stewie} Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kenz 0 #11 March 3, 2007 thank you for all of your messages and support laura passed away this morning before i made it - but i know she came and said goodbye - please just keep her and her family in your thoughts and prayers i know she is no longer in pain and finally at peace thanks and god bless"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kbordson 8 #12 March 3, 2007 silence says it best.......... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
