kansasskydiver

Jimmy Coiner can build a snowman out of rain.

Jimmy Coiner is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a fucking Jeep.

Jimmy Coiner plays russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver... and wins.

Jimmy Coiner is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Jimmy Coiner

Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Jimmy Coiner's PC will crash.

Jimmy Coiner has to maintain a concealed weapon license in all 50 states in order to legally wear pants.

Jimmy Coiner is always on top during sex because Jimmy Coiner never fucks up.

Jimmy Coiner was once on Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.

Jimmy Coiner can kill two stones with one bird.

Jimmy Coiner doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.

Jimmy Coiner doesn't pop his collar, his shirts just get erections when they touch his body.

Jimmy Coiner secretly sleeps with every woman in the world once a month. They bleed for a week as a result.

If you play Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you will hear Jimmy Coiner banging your sister.

Jimmy Coiner can delete the Recycling Bin.

Eric Mielke AND Jason Norris own pairs of Jimmy Coiner pajamas

Jimmy Coiner will never die, because the Grim Reaper is too scared to come after him

Superman's REAL weakness is Jimmy Coiner, kryptonite are just his boogers

Jimmy Coiner can do a wheelie on a unicycle.

Jimmy Coiner owns the greatest Poker Face of all-time. It helped him win the 2006 Skydive Radio Poker Championship despite him holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.

In order to control illegal immigration in the United States, the president installed cardboard cutouts of Jimmy Coiner along the US/Mexico border.

You know the theory of the big bang right? Well that was in reference to Jimmy Ripping ass... The Milky Way was the runs...

That's correct. We must collaborate our efforts! Meet by the swing set tonight at 1030 hahaha

Jimmy Coiner is so powerful Andrew's computer just randomly shut down!

Ever wonder why not a single woman has come forward and claimed to have had sex with Jimmy Coiner? It's cause they're STILL having orgasm's and can't walk straight

Once, while having sex in a tractor-trailer, some of Jimmy Coiners sperm escaped and got into the engine. We now know this truck as Optimus Prime