TylerDurden

It could be worse. A woman could cut off your penis while you're sleeping and toss it out the window of a moving car.

The microwave cordon-bleu hobby kit.

DID YOU KNOW? You can use old worn out tires for campfire kindling.

Lou's Tavern.

Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think every thing you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned- Tyler.

It is hard to quit smoking. Every one of them looks real good to me right about now. Every cigarette looks like it was made by God, rolled by Jesus and moistened shut with Angelina Jolie's pussy.

Start a fight with a complete stranger.

Did you know that a car powered by electricity traveling at 40 M.P.H. causes just as much damage as a car powered by gas?

Sitting motionless, nothing happening spring coming grass growing.

He who knows others is wise; He who knows himself is enlightened.

You wake up at Seatac, SFO, LAX. You wake up at O'Hare, Dallas-Fort Worth, BWI. Pacific, mountain, central. Lose an hour, gain an hour. This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time. You wake up at Air Harbor International. If you wake up at a different time, in a different place, could you wake up as a different person?

I've been going to Debtor's Anonymous. You want to see some really fucked up people!?

You have to know the answer to this question! If you died right now, how would you feel about your life?

You are not your number of jumps.

Alphonzo or Alafonts if he is Italian. I often go by the name Rupert or Cornilius.