fonz

The difference being??? Alphons (sorry, just picking nits here) edited to remove quoted reference to pedophilia. And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Come to think of it... We haven't really had winter here in Holland for years but I do remember hating it. So hate winter all you like. Forget I said anything. Heh. We have those kind of programs here too. Some of them are actually pretty good, but others are... well... what you said. Bad debate programs on TV should definately go into Room 101. Another annoyance: people advertising food as being "hot" or "spicy" when it really isn't. Such a bummer... Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

I'm afraid I disagree. There are only two kinds of jokes: good ones (in good taste, too) and bad ones. Regardless of what the subject is. Alphons (and since this thread was about "bad" jokes...) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

From experience, I'd say try military surplus. Works great. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

By the way, spilling beer all over your K&R 2 sure sucks. Alphons (gotta tidy up that friggin' desk I guess) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Always taste. If I want to get drunk, I'll just drink more of whatever tastes good. However, as one gets more and more sloshed, one's definition of "taste" might change somewhat accordingly Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Try IRC instead. Lots of people to be bugged. Agreed on the spam issue. I mean... stock trade, Viagra, penis enlargements, breast enlargements, fake Rolexes, crappy software... What's the bl**ding point??? Hell, I even get spam in languages I hardly (if at all) understand. Spamming should be punishable by death as far as I'm concerned. Execution on TV, live, all channels. I have many pet peeves but there's probably nothing that aggrevates me more than those bl***y spammers. As Worf would put it: "Definately feeling agressive tendencies now, sir!" And you are supposed to be Norwegian? Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Beer. Grolsch, to be exact. Alphons (the native kind, not that export crap) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Nah. They only suck when they want to. Generally, I'd take ten cats over one dog any day of the week. Not that I dislike dogs, but cats kick ass while dogs are "just" ok. Cats and tarantulas don't mix by the way. Neither do cats and snakes. Not that anything bad ever happened in my house, it's just something worth considering. Actually, they are. They're just up there with other farm animals. Alphons (thinking of applying at the local zoo) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Hmmm. That kind of snake is a bit out of my league. It's cool if you can keep that kind of animal in a responsible manner, but I sure hope that you know what you did or are doing... Alphons (seriously) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Try me. You'll be very sorry. Alphons (what goes around...) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Even more to the point: don't tailgate me because you WILL get brake tested. According to dutch legislation, if I slam the brakes and you hit me from behind, it's YOUR fault because you didn't keep sufficient distance to be able to stop before hitting me. I drive at any certain speed for a reason. It could be the weather, it could be traffic density, it could be the presence of cameras. Whatever. Just DON'T tailgate me. You'll be very very sorry. Alphons (some people found that out the hard way) Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Try that with Darth Vader. I don't think it will work. Alphons (Jedi power and all that) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

I'm sure that's a much less expensive trait! All the stamps and "signature wanted" fees add up, but it's cheaper indeed. Alphons (then again, the dutch are cheap, too at least according to the belgians) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Ask the Tanner family about Alf. They'll probably say your mileage may vary... Also... Alf doesn't want to phone home, he just does it. And you get to pay the bill. Those long-distance calls to Melmac add up quickly... Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Nah. Just spent too much time on the train today. Besides, I'm dutch! Americans like to sue, we like to complain. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Good point. Then read the question as what pets you'd like to keep yourself. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Multiple answers allowed. If you feel like elaborating, then by all means do. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

* Women with way too much perfume. You know them. When they walk by, the next five minutes you can't smell a damn thing except for that much-too-sweet stinking crap they drowned themselves in. Whatever happened to subtlety? * People standing still on escalators in such a way that normal people can't pass them. * People dawdling at counters, cash registers etc. (the "it's my turn now, so the world can come to a f***ing halt, what the f*** should I care that there's people waiting behind me?" kind of types). * People letting their dogs shit anywhere without cleaning up after the offending canine. The animals can't help it but the owners should have their noses shoved into the turd their animal just laid down. * People cutting in front of you in queues. They should be shot on the spot. No trial, no jury, straight to f***ing execution. No mercy. * People yelling into their cellphones like they need to physically bridge the distance to the person on the other end. * People yapping away into their cellphones in the most annoying places and/or circumstances. Usually it's about the stupidest things possible, too. Makes you wish you had a GSM jamming device in your pocket... * People to whom talking is more important than breathing. They don't care what it's about but they just must talk and can't shut the f*** up for a measly few bl***ing minutes. * Littering. Nuff said. * DZ staff members jamming themselves into already filled-to-the-max loads they didn't manifest for, just for a solo fun jump, so that others must spend the plane ride lying down with the elbows of heavily-built tandem masters buried in their faces. * Gear manufacturers who treat their customers like shit because they think you'll buy their products anyway. Doesn;t work for me. I'll take my business elsewhere thank you very much. * People who cannot admit they're wrong and keep pushing their point even though every one of their arguments has been convincingly shot down. Just a few things that aggrevate me to no end... Alphons (you asked for rants, you got them) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

I voted "I don't like Windows." It's nowhere near explicit enough, but closest to it. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

i have several computers so i use several operating systems but almost all of them are some incarnation of unix. my primary desktop machine currently runs freebsd. Alphons P.s. posting here from a cellular phone sucks! And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Okay, that does it. Screw you guys I'm going home! Talking poo is where I draw the line. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

I think I love you. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Must be avaliable on CD or DVD (legally, so no bootlegs unless you send them to me). My favorite would be Queen at Wembley in 1986. hands down. Alphons (best rock gig in history) And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Most important thing is to start with an image (or a crop from a large image) that has about the right width-to-height ratio (which is 65:75). That goes a long way. Alphons And five hundred entirely naked women dropped out of the sky on parachutes. -- The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy