Next time you have a bad day at work, think of this guy........ Rob
Is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Mayo (IRELAND).
performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an
sent to his sister. She then sent it to RnaG (Irish radio station) in
Galway, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to
Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had
A bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at
thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not
bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with
A few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the
The sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.
This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm
Is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This £20,000
piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a
delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a
garden hose, which is taped to the air hose Now this sounds like a
darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the
Hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole
with Warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi.
Everything was going well until all of sudden, my butt started to
of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few
seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back,
the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened. The hot
machine Had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't
Stick to it. However, the crack of my ar$e was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding
The jellyfish into the crack of my ar$e. I informed the dive supervisor
my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to
fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing
Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three
agonizing in-water decompression stops totalling thirty-five minutes
before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass
helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of
running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it
my ar$e as soon as I got in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my
hole was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work,
about how much
Worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your backside. Now
Repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job"