patymaciel

I did Level 4 a couple of weeks ago and I failed miserably. I was spinning out of control and I kept fu***ing it up. Now I know what I did wrong, but my instructor had to stop my spinning THREE times. So I obviously failed. He was so sweet, that he didn't want to "fail me", so we were going to name the next jump 4.5, LOL. Anyway, I would like to get some tunnel time before repeating Level 4, as I feel that would give me some confidence. So if you just turned without wanting to, I guess it's not that terrible, I was spinning like a record!

I am on my AFF course (had to pause for tragic reasons that I explain in another thread), but I do like to do just one jump a day. I'm a slow learner and this pace works for me. I would always arrive early, and be on the first flight (no wait time!!!!), then I would hang around the Dropzone for the rest of the day! I love to watch fun jumpers land, and watch my instructor teach other people, and I've made some new friends! When the last flight is done, we'd have beers and call it a day! I think it's worth the 2 hour drive from home!

Hi again guys. Back here with sorrow.

First, thanks again for your advice! I did a very decent 3rd jump, my instructor even congratulated me on it. A couple of weeks later I did jump no. 4, which I failed miserably (I was spinning and spinning, my instructor had to stop me three times. I was stable for a few seconds and it was time to deploy, when I did, I started spinning again, and it was kind of a hard opening. Got a little bruise on my face (that I didn't notice until someone back at the dropzone pointed out at me). I landed on my ass (again), but I did land right on the spot where I was suppossed to land (yay!).

Anywho, I was going to repeat that jump (Level 4) and attempt Level 5 this upcoming weekend. And here comes the tragic part, which I am still having a hard time dealing with: my instructor had a terrible accident while doing a tandem jump and neither him nor the tandem student made it (it's in Spanish, but you can see the video of the accident in this link https://www.adn40.mx/noticia/mexico/nota/2019-03-24-19-47/mueren-dos-personas-en-accidente-de-paracaidas-en-morelos/). I believe you build a very strong bond with the person who teaches you to fly, and this hit me very hard. I was devastated and I couldn't even sleep on Sunday night. I just couldn't believe it, if someone was thorough with equipment checking and emergency procedures was this guy!! (he would constantly ask me questions of what I would do in different emergency scenarios, not just while training, but even while we were chilling having a beer!) I kept wondering all night what had exactly happened. Then at some point the next day I also started to think about my course. At first I thought of quitting (was this a sign that I shouldn't skydive?), but after his memorial service, I decided that I want to finish the AFF course, to honor his memory, and make him proud as I was going to be his first female graduate. I don't know when I'll finish, as I need to find a new instructor, I will look into my choices in the area, but I keep wondering if I will find someone like Mau (my instructor). He was very patient with me, and I trusted him since the moment I met him, he knew how to deal with a slow learner like me.

Anyway, I needed to vent, since I can't think of anything else since Sunday night. Thanks for reading this.

On 2/26/2019 at 11:19 PM, wolfriverjoe said:

Ok, you asked.

I did Static Line progression. I didn't have any issues with canopy control, in part because I am a licensed pilot and understand flight, flaring, landing and that sort of stuff. 

 

BUT...

I had a hell of a time getting to free fall. S/L does 2 'just jumps', 3 practice pulls, Hop & Pop, then higher jumps with longer delays (timed) up to the point where you start watching the altimeter during free fall to decide when to pull.

I had about a dozen H&Ps. I had a very hard time keeping my arch and staying stable.

When I finally got to free fall (10 sec delay), I freaked out. I probably looked like a cat being put in a bath. I de-arched. When I went to pull, I forgot to bring the other arm in. So I did a barrel roll. And pulled on my back. I watched the D-bag come up between my legs and had just enough time to think 'Oh crap. This is NOT good' before the bag got to line stretch. I was yanked around in a 3/4 flip to upright, then my momentum carried me up and over again. My left arm was still extended, so I ended up with the risers on that side wrapped around my bicep. I nearly dislocated my shoulder unwrapping the riser, and had a full twist in the lines. Yes, it was a true 'flip through', not a 'step through'. I've heard people say that a flip through is impossible. I can say for certain that they are. 
And that's not the worst part.

 

The worst part is that after I took some time to calm down, thing about it and practice my arch some more, I came back a week or so later...

And did it again. Same 'cat being forced into a bath' free fall. Same 'forgot to pull my other arm in' barrel roll. This time, I saw the D-bag come up between my legs and had just enough time to think "Oh no, not again" before the 3/4 flip to upright, momentum carrying me through the risers and a flip through again. With the riser around my arm again. 

 

After that, the mental block got so bad, I couldn't jump. I tried twice, and just couldn't get on the plane. 

I ended up doing a two instructor AFF jump (just one). I knew it was a mental issue. My reasoning (discussed with the instructors and they agreed) was that I didn't trust the arch. If I had a couple of 'training wheels' (the instructors) who I could trust to keep me stable if I couldn't, then I could get comfortable enough in free fall to relax and arch properly. 

It worked. After about 4 or 5 seconds in free fall, I could arch. The rest of the jump went perfectly. The instructors said they could feel when I 'got it' because I stopped fighting the air and let it mold me. 
While the rest of my journey to my license and beyond was not flawless, once I got past that mental block, it went a LOT better.

 

You can do this, if you want to.

Thank you so much for your reply and the link to the cartoon! You have been very helpful! I feel just like the duck in the cartoon (BTW, a lot of people call me Pato, which means "duck" in English), specially that part where she says "Why was I doing this?.  I wasn't a thrill seeker.  It scared the @#$* out of me.  It was something I'd watch from afar. That's cool, I'd tell myself, but I could never do it.  This seemed reasonable.  Then again, really something I could never do?  What would happen if I tried?"
I have confirmed to my instructor that I will be at the DZ 8:45am on Saturday for my 3rd jump. Wish me luck!

LONG POST:
So, I put my AFF on hold for a couple of months because I wasn't really confortable in the DZ where I did my Level 1/Tandem thingy. I switched to another DZ and started all over again. Did Level 1 and 2 last weekend (no tandems, 2:1 exits). I think I did a decent Level 1 jump (followed instructions, pretty stable for a first timer and I deployed by myself), except that I totally fucked up my landing. Have you seen those videos in which a driving student hits gas instead of brakes and they just keep on doing that until they crash? well, that happened to me on my first landing, I did a pretty good landing pattern, I was heading towards the landing area, and WHY OH WHY I made a right turn.... and I knew that I was going in the wrong direction, but kept doing it (just like those driving students). I landed on my ass and my instructor told me "thank God you are in a forgiving student canopy, otherwise we'd be waiting for an ambulance right now". So my confidence got pretty broken, that was so not what I had pictured for my first jump, I fucked up, and felt SO stupid. Then I get on the plane again for a second jump, and I was so focused on trying to understand the signals from the instructor flying in front of me, that I totally forgot to check my altimeter (*major facepalm*), so my main instructor that was grabbing me had to shake me to make me focus, and it was time to deploy and I did. But then, I fucked up my landing again!!!! I couldn't hear well on the radio in which direction I should land, and instead of checking the direction of the wind (another facepalm), I went where I "thought" I had heard. So.... I made my landing pattern, and I missed the landing spot, I was still too high, and I was heading towards some cars and a hangar.... I started to make the same mistake as the first time (turning right), but then realized what I was doing and corrected it and landed on my ass again on the driveway (luckily a car that was coming in saw me and stopped). Ego severely bruised, but no scratches. Still, I felt pretty frustrated and my confidence went to the floor. I didn't want to continue for the day. Later, I went to have dinner with my instructor and 3 other diver friends and they told me I should focus on what I did right, instead of what I did wrong, just learn from my mistakes, they were pretty supportive but at the same time very honest. I had a meltdown as soon as I got in the car and cried all the way back to the hotel (I'm a crybaby). I was still pretty bummed on Sunday, so I just hung around at the DZ, watching/shadowing my instructor teach a kid who did his last 3 levels that day and graduated. Two days later, I am still struggling with my confidence, I want to do level 3 on Saturday and maybe just do one level each weekend... take it very slow, as I seem to get new information slower than other people. Please, tell me your struggles when you were doing your AFF course...!! I need to hear I am not the only shitty student out there!!! If you were the perfect student, I don't want to hear from you, seriously!! I kind of need stories of shitty students that finally made it and are happy and safe divers today, please!!

If you made it this far in this rant, THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Yeah, paddles would work for you! I'm doing my AFF with radio, but I had started in another DZ that works with paddles from the ground.

I'm just getting started on my AFF, so these are probably super cheesy, but my playlist has:

- Best Day Of My Life - American Authors (title explains it all)

- Sissy That Walk - RuPaul (because of that chorus that goes "and If I fly or if I fall, at least I can say gave it all, I'm on my way", and also "my pussy is on fire, now kiss the flame" lol)

- Crazy - Gnarls Barkley ("even your emotions have an echo in so much space...")

- Alive - Empire of the Sun ("lovin' every minute 'cause you make me feel so alive...")

- Learn to Fly - Foo Fighters  (too obvious, I know!)

- Lose Yourself - Eminem ("success is my only motherfuckin' option, failure's not")

- The Walker - Fitz and the Tantrums ("oh here we go, feel it in my soul, really need it, need it, so go, gotta feel it, body takes control..")

 

And I came to this forum looking for more songs, because my playlist is so damn short, and the ride to the DZ is almost 2 hours long!!

***
Thank you very much for your input, I think it's a good idea to watch others land while talking to my instructor. My DZ is currently having a Boogie, so there is a lot of people and I am going to wait until it's over to schedule my next jump. They do not do radio on student landings, they do signals from the ground (you have to mirror them), which I think is a good thing for me, since I have the hardest time telling "right" from "left" (you should see how I make people scream when I'm driving and someone tells me where to make a turn, lol ). Anyway, I am planning on going the day after tomorrow to do some tunnel time (they have a small tunnel at the DZ). I think it will be helpful and there will be a lot of landings to watch!

Any further advice you (or anyone reading this) may have, is welcome!

Hi, I'm Paty, and I am getting started in the AFF course. I have done 2 regular tandems plus another tandem since Level 1 in my DZ is a tandem, but with altitude awareness, and deployment. I have 10 minutes in the tunnel and I've done pretty good. I love the exits and the free fall, but what freaks me out is everything that comes after deployment! from having the three Fs to landing! every video I see focuses on free fall, not on controlling the canopy and landing... am I freaking out over the easy part or what? I haven't scheduled my next training because of this... thoughts?