Ploy

There's a big part of me that feels the same as you would gunsmokex. Irritated and mad that someone would pull the ol' switcheroo on me, especially when I feel like I did the right thing early on in the relationship and communicated to her that jumping is a strong passion of mine, and she needs to be OK with it to be with me. She not only went on that 3rd date with me, but also after we were engaged a friend of hers came to visit and wanted to go, so the three of us went. AND, for a long time we had been talking about getting her A license, and she seemed genuinely enthusiastic about the idea. I put this in the Safety forum because it seems like she's apprehensive about the safety of the sport due to the long absence we've had from it. I think her fears for my safety are rooted in the fact that she doesnt truly remember the experience. So I've been paying particular attention to responses in this thread where you guys had experience overcoming the fears from the non-jumping people in your life. I KNOW once her initial fears and apprehension are tackled, we'll find that happy middle that Ropeadope spoke of.

Really fantastic replies, thank you all for helping out. The common theme among all of you (and applies to me as well) is the happiness jumping brings. I appreciate all the input! I actually relate the most with you RopeaDope- when I got home from Afghanistan (I was civilian, and am in no way thinking my garbage could ever compare to what you went through), I arrived to find my ex had taken everything I owned and moved out to live with her new boyfriend that had been living in my house while I was gone. I realized my life from age 22 through 28 had been absolutely wasted on this person. On leave passing through Dubai I went for my first tandem, and I was hooked. I found a new love, and a new family in the DZs I went to. I found freedom, and for the first time I felt alive. Every jump after that, I've felt the same. So yea, I'm not just an adrenaline junky who only stops doing stupid stuff once he's dead. I hope my wife can see that, and I can see you all in the sky soon. Thanks!

Thanks a ton for the replies. Without getting too deep into relationship issues and keeping this more as a safety thread, a very long time ago I explicitly asked her, are you ok with being with a skydiver? I told her the stats and the risks, and at the time she understood and was still ok with it. After so much time has passed without me jumping, it seems she's pulling back from that. I get it- it's scary, and like someone said, all the risk is with her while all the enjoyment is with me. Especially unfortunate is that my DZ is ZHills, where some percent of the fatalities in the US has happened over at least the last three years. I watched one, one was someone I knew, and at least two others made the news. (Not at all a knock on ZHills, I know its as safe a place as any) If I could convince her to take AFF level 1, could that be an effective way to showcase how safety-conscious the community is? I know my mind was made up already when I took it, but did any of you feel better or worse about the risk, reward, or both after your ground school and first jump?

Long time lurker here. I've been out of the sport for financial reasons for about a year now, and over that year I went and got married. Now I'd like to get back into the sport, and although I actually took my wife for a jump on our third date, she's extremely against the idea because she's afraid I'll get hurt. While I understand and greatly appreciate the sentiment, I just can't turn off my love for the sport. I'd like some advice on how to approach trying to change her mind. If it can't be done, then obviously she's more important to me than jumping, but if anyone's been in a similar scenario, how did you do it? I know I can quote statistics all day, but I'm doubtful that'll be enough because she's a smart cookie, and knows that any risk associated with skydiving is additional risk in an already risky life. I guess I need to come at it from an emotional angle? Help!