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bertusgeert

Funny Stories

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We all have stories of funny things that happened at the dropzone. Post your funny stories here:D

I had just landed after my last level AFF, and was super-excited. The crowd at the dropzone was congratulating me, and I couldnt wait to go make a jump by myself! I had put my gear down to finish packing some tandems, couldnt wait to go on that HOP n POP.
So after finishing my packing, including my own rental rig, I geared up for the next load.
I had everything on me, except that golden altimiiter I wore on my grad-jump. I looked and looked and looked, but to no avail. Someone suggested that I need to open my packjob. Yeah Right, and miss the next load? No WAY! I hit the righ a few times with my fist, but didnt feel anything. So I got another Alti and got on the load.
On the way up, all the senior guys are telling me how I need to hop, count to 5 and pop. So I'm a little nervous, but ready to go.
The guy before me opened the door at 4,000, the lowest I have ever seen the ground through an open door aside from when you get in. PRETTY DANG LOW I TELL YA! So being that nervous, my first HOP n POP was more like a POP n HOP!
But my mind wasn't much concerned about this, because as soon as I was under canopy, I saw a golden blink up to my right. :o Then I saw it fall into the distance. and gone. I tried to see where it landed, and looked for it later, but could never find it. [:/]
From now on, I'll much rather wait another load than waste a $130!

(Stories were later told, and turns out one guy packed his wallet into his packjob before!)

Now I want to hear your funny stories!

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A friend was jumping with her sisters custom frap hat and it came off once she reached terminal. Shes freaking because the $300 price to replace and completely screws up the 4-way. Her sister is pissed because no points were turned (didn't care about the frap at the moment) and my friend is trying to justify the loss of concentration. A guy walks into the hanger and asks "who left their frap hat in the pea?" Good spot or what?!

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LMAO! That's hilarious! Guess I can see how easy it would seal some foriegn object up in a packjob, especially one o' those big ol' student jobbers.

I wanna hear more of these... bet people have packed some crazy things up :)
And congrats on your successful POP n HOP! B|

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Now I want to hear your funny stories!


Uh... hm, lesse... There were no larger groups on an Otter load one day, so my 2-way is gonna be the first out the door. Neither of us had been in this situation before. Being the low timers that we are, we're totally fixated on the door opening task. Such a huge resposibility! Gotta make sure we get it open in a swift manner as to get the hell out of everyone's way. We reach altitude, engines are cut, time to go! With lightning fast speed we throw the door open, get into position, make our count and perform a gorgeous exit. We left behind a plane full of confused instructors and oblivious students.

See... there's this little green light that we're supposed to wait for. Sometimes it's easy to overlook the simple things :$

Did make it back to the DZ by the way.

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During my AFF, I had to do 2 sit fly jumps. On both jumps, my altimeter came off, but I managed to hold onto it both times with my fingers. At high speeds, I guess these kinds of things are bound to happen! Luckily, I didnt lose it like some of you did!!
Blue skies and SAFE landings!
~Amanda~

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I know you are a newbie, but funny stories belong to TALK BACK.



Well, it would all fall in the correct category if he changed the name to "Funny Skydiving Stories". B|

Wrong Way
D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451
The wiser wolf prevails.

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During my AFF, I had to do 2 sit fly jumps.



How did you sitfly on AFF? I'm confused?



I guess AFF is considered levels 1-7, but where I did AFF they have it structured into a 20 (now 25) jump course, where you have to pass each level in order to procede. When you are done, you should be signed off on all reqts. for your A-license. So let me correct myself and say when I was on "student status."
Blue skies and SAFE landings!
~Amanda~

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One of our crazy swoopers hurt his leg so when he finally gets back to jumping, he doesn't upsize temporarily to like 3 digits of sf, he just wears padded shorts and slides the landings in on his butt. This is funny alone, BUT

another, newer not-quite-as crazy swooper at the same DZ skates a nice one in and at the end of his swoop, as he passes us, he shouts some good-natured trash talk about there being no need for anyone to land on their butt. He hadn't finished his sentence when he slipped and fell over backwards going like 5 mph.

Then there's the 1st-person helmet-cam video of a nice swoop that catches the flag pole. :D (For the record, no injuries or damage.)

-=-=-=-=-
Pull.

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On a demo, it's my buddy's first time spotting the
Beecch 18 from CWH. Things get rather hectic after throwing the wdi, and buddy's got his head out the door craning to see the spot... Suddenly he sees it and starts waving his hand at the pilot to go left, but we're all standing in the way blocking his view... One of the guys motions to the side of the plane to the spotting controls - a switch with left and right buttons - but buddy misunderstands and grabs the first thing he sees... It's a funnel, connected he supposes to a speaking hose going to the pilot... He starts yelling into it but nothing happens so he gets his face right into it yelling at the top of his lungs... Turns out to be the receptacle of the inflight plumbing that the aircrew uses on its long trips from airshow to airshow...
If some old guy can do it then obviously it can't be very extreme. Otherwise he'd already be dead.
Bruce McConkey 'I thought we were gonna die, and I couldn't think of anyone

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I know you are a newbie, but funny stories belong to TALK BACK.



Well, it would all fall in the correct category if he changed the name to "Funny Skydiving Stories". B|



At my DZ I sometimes used to help with 'just-off-student-status' jumpers, spotting, despatching etc, even though I was never a JM. On one occasion I had three rather attractive young lasses in the C182 (no door) with me. I was very aware that I was the 'senior' jumper on the plane and although I was never a skygod and always very conservative, I wanted to be 'professional'. I knelt in the door, all calm and collected, occassionally sticking my head out to 'make sure' we where we were. On jump run I tried to get up in order to do the spot. Alas, it was not to be... My right leg had gone completely numb and collapsed under me. I promptly fell out of the plane, head and shoulders first, missing the wheel by millimeters. It all happened so fast that I have no idea how the girls reacted. The pilot, who was a heads-up jumper himself, later told me it was the most undignified exit he had ever seen.:P
It was most certainly up there with 'my most embarrassing moments'.:$



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The last time I ever paid anyone to pack for me...

I couldn't find my frap hat, so I took my old Pro-Tec...spotted the Hop-n-Pop from 5k...exited, deployed, and found my frap hat! Started spiralling down to catch it, but realised where it was going and landed normally, next to it, smack bang in the centre of the pit...put it on and walked back to the hangar...DZ control thought I'd lost my pilot chute or bag! B| Like I said...the last time someone else packed my kit!
---
Swoopert, CS-Aiiiiiii!
Piccies

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During my AFF, I had to do 2 sit fly jumps.



How did you sitfly on AFF? I'm confused?



I started learning to sitly during AFF as well. I was on the 15 jump progression and sitflying was aprt of it if you wanted it to be. My first sit exit was on my 5th solo
7 ounce wonders, music and dogs that are not into beer

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One of the stories related to us when we started back in 73 at Port Severn Ontario, was about a very nervous first timer going up in a Cherroke 6. Having had all the prerqusite traing and warnings about this and that and the other thing, remember this on military surplus B4 rigs, he was sitting with his back against the rear of the plane as the JM was hanging his head out the door to spot.
The student suddenly started to scream at the top of his lungs "MY CHUTES OPEN MY CHUTES OPEN"
At this the jump master (still with his head in the wind stream) turned and yelled back "Ya don't worry it'll open"
Watch my video Fat Women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eRWkEky8GoI

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you're not the first one to pack an altimeter in there. a few weeks ago, im jumping at a different DZ, doing 4 way and the other 3 are telling me to get on the plane. i tell them i can't find my altimeter, and one of them gives me one to borrow, and says that he'll help me look for it once we get down, and that hes sure its just laying around somewhere.
you guessed it, when i open at 3000, i spot something small fly by me and land in a forest. a $115 doller jump for me that day. :S

MB 3528, RB 1182

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We were doing sixteen ways in the Bahamas. One of the photographers, Rickster, hit the door on exit and lost his wide angle lens and was bumming all the way down. He mentioned it to the group on landing. Daniel reached into his jumpsuit and pulled out the lens. His story was... He looked up just after exit and there, hanging weightless in front of him, was something he couldn't identify but he plucked it out of the sky as it started to accelerate towards Davy Jones' locker.

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Well I was asked to do a safety seminar at Elsinore about 8 years ago. During the day I was thinking of things to go over and did a 6 way with some people.

We ended up long towards Grand avenue and at breakoff I was lucky enough to be tracking back towards the DZ.

I knew I wasn't going to make it back to the landing area if I tracked as long as I might normally have, so I waved off looked over my shoulder and tossed.

At line stretch I'm looking up at my canopy and reaching for the risers when I see a body with a deploying canopy coming right at me.

As he went by something hit my left hand as his canopy brushed me.

This was a guy who was directly opposite me in the last point, a round. Normally I would have thought he'd be tracking for Grand avenue but I guess he knew where the DZ was, too. He was a visiting Japanense with about 1,000 jumps and no English.

He opened below me and I followed him down and landed next to him.

My first question, in my best AFF/I voice, was "What happened?".
He replied by giving me my wrist mount Altimaster III which had been on my left hand and he had grabbed on the way by, I hadn't noticed it yet :$

He wrote a page in my logbook (in Japanese) which I think is his side of it but I haven't had it translated yet.
Or maybe he just said I was an idiot.

I'm sure you can guess what my topic was that evening.;)

Red, White and Blue Skies,

John T. Brasher D-5166

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On Saturday November 11th 1966 Clair Wimer D-1413 , John Corteau D-1271 & Bob McDonnell D-10 did a Santa demo jump at the Thruway Plaza in Cheektowaga NY. The plan was for Santa [Clair Wimer] and his helpers, [ John Corteau & Bob McDonnell] to land their PC’s in the parking lot, than be rushed into the store where the real store Santa (an elderly gent) would take over and make his entrance as if he'd made the jump. Clair, John & Bob would throw the Santa suits and their rigs into some gear bags and sneak out the back. At the time New York State law still made demo jumps illegal. Well, the cops came and thinking he was the jumper, rushed the elderly gent Santa Claus just as he made his entrance. As they tried to arrest him he started swinging his arms , swearing and yelling “Do I look like I’d jump out of a God Damn airplane !?”. All this happened right in front of all the kids. Many who began to cry. The cops went back and arrested Clair & Bob. The story made the news worldwide. The trial was a scream. The defense attorney asked the arresting officer to point out the man he saw descending under canopy in the santa suit. He couldn’t identify either Bob or Clair who were now in their street clothes. They were acquitted.

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I had the privilege of making a jump with Bob about 10 years ago at Elsinore.

I've been a rain-chicken for Santa, also.
(rain-chicken; that's a chicken with antlers) jumping into a
swimming pool sized area filled with fake mashed potatoes for Boston Markets 500 store opening.

Red, White and Blue Skies,

John T. Brasher D-5166

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