Feel too scared to continue

[JenBubbles 0]

I have recently done 2 tandem skydives, and AFF stages 1 and 2. This is the first time in my life I have ever done anything like this before, and have never previously thought myself capable of doing this. I felt really terrified, but so exhilarated after each jump. But after stage 2, which went quite well, I suddenly became completely overwhelmed and felt extreme panic at the thought of ever doing it again. A week later, i went back to DZ to talk to my JM about it, and decided to try for stage 3 the next day. That evening, i experienced profound anxiety, couldnt relax my thoughts at all, felt ill and waves of fear came over me, really freaky. In the end I was nearly fainting and i threw up. I didnt do the jump after all. I'd like to overcome this panic but dont know how and feel upset that i may not be able to do it again. Have even thought of having hypnosis! Any thoughts??

[sid 1]

Jen, first, well done for recognizing your state and not endangering yourself and your instructors by attempting to jump while in that condition. This isn't the forum to diagnose why you felt that way or what your motives are for skydiving (as in are you skydiving to prove something, or simply for the sport), but as an instructor and (in an earlier occupational role) a psychologist and hypnotherapist I can assure you that you can overcome the fear and panic. By indicating that you are open to the use of hypnosis, it would seem to me that it might be an effective tool for you, so call around.
I've known many students who've managed to move through the fear and managed to reframe it as excitement. Good luck - stay as on top of it as you are and judging by what you've written you'll be a safe skydiver soon.

Pete Draper,

Just because my life plan is written on the back of a Hooter's Napkin, it's still a life plan.... right?

[TattooedMoFo 0]

I had a similar problem myself. I did static line progression up until 5sec freefall, which out of a Cessna 206 and 4000ft scared the living shit out ofme at the time. Due to work issues I din't jump for about a year, but the feeling and love of the sport(even scared) I signed up to do my AFF. Once I was out there and looking at the documents having signed and paid I was struck by a similar fear you have now, but I did it did it and pushed to do the 2nd level. By pushing myself it helped get over it. Fear is natural and even when you have done hundreds of jumps every once in awhile that fear creeps back in, and many skydivers will tell you that. But you must remember you did the training, the JM feels confident in your ability to take you up and let you jump , and yes it is dangerous and yes things go wrong, but the training provided will help over come any of the problems that you may encounter. When you accept all of that, you will wonder why you feared it in the forst place.
just relax and have fun it will eventually go away.
Good luck and blue skies

[rgoper 0]

always Follow Your Heart. if your hearts not in it, you won't be either, this can cause a great amount of distraction while diving, thus leading to other untimely events. if you try to overcome your fears and do not succeed, do not feel like a failure, you've already achieved higher objectives than most humans i know. good luck.

--Richard--
"We Will Not Be Shaken By Thugs, And Terroist"

[Skyrose7 0]

If you really want to jump, don't let fear get in the way. I went through a phase in my student progression where I was -sure- my parachute wouldn't open. I was so freaked, I started feel sick. Of course, it did open, and I eventually got over this fear. I think looking around at the situation helps get over fear. This isn't something that no one has ever done before, so why can't you(or I ) do it? If someone else can do it, I sure as hell can.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The mind is like a parachute--it works better when it is open. JUMP.
MaryRose

[CrazyIvan 0]

We all go thru that experience, now, if I were you, I'd ask my instructor to do a 'confidence jump' what I mean is, ask the instructor to jump with you, and just fly, no turns, no flips, no maneuvers, just enjoy the view, maybe what is happening is that you are putting too much presssure on yourself and trying to NOT TO SCREW UP the level.

I respect your desicion, I'm just giving you my humble opinion.

__________________________________________
Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

[Ron 7]

do another tandem....See if you can relax...

If not, and you have this great fear...
Its ok to quit. You have already done something most of the world will never do. Skydiving is not for everyone, and I don't think it should be.

For what it is worth...I have thought about quitting. Sometimes you have to ask yourself...Why am I doing this?
Your answers will change as your life goes on.

Nothing wrong with any path...but you have to choose the path for you to follow.

Ron

"No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334

[trumpetfish 0]

I had a similar experience after i completed my AFF. I just started really thinking about what could go wrong. So I started asking more about malfunctions, watched as many videos about what could go wrong as i could and asked as many questions as well. I found that my fear was directly related to my doubts about how I would react in an emergency. The more I learned about safety procedures and the gear involved and how it works the easier it was to deal with my anxiety.

hope this helps.

[JoHawley 0]

I gt reallt anxious during my first solo jumps after AFF. I just kept jumping through it and it went away after a few jumps. How you get through it, mate.

[skybytch 259]

Quote

Its ok to quit. You have already done something most of the world will never do. Skydiving is not for everyone, and I don't think it should be.

For what it is worth...I have thought about quitting. Sometimes you have to ask yourself...Why am I doing this?
Your answers will change as your life goes on.

Nothing wrong with any path...but you have to choose the path for you to follow.

Ron, you said exactly what I was going to say... but you said it far better than I would have.

[oldnewbie 0]

Jenbubbles, I had almost the same problem. I didn't know why i was so scared!! I love airplanes, am a pilot, etc. etc. I'm not even sure why i made my first jump, other than my parents live next to Eloy and took me over there to see if i wanted to jump. I was Ok with the tandems, but as soon as I had my own rig on, i became very scared. I would talk to myself all the way up to altitude, wondering why I'm doing this. I was scared to death, and to be honest, i didn't know why i kept jumping. I didn't enjoy it at all!!!! But i do love *flying*!!! My vacation was over when i had completed my first solo!!! A year later i went to visit my parents again, and for some reason i wanted to complete what i had started. I didn't know why, but I did. I was looking forward to jumping again, knowing that i would be totally scared. I had a whole year to work up to being totally scared again. Well, i went, I jumped, I wasn't totally scared, and I kind of enjoyed it.. So I started my coached jumps, and had a great coach. For some reason i wasn't scared anymore. He made me laugh, and I started enjoying jumping. I don't know why I'm not totally scared anymore, but i'm not!! I hope this helps you!! Now if i would just go to a dropzone that is closer than 1800 miles away from me!!!

[nightjumps 1]

One of the things that has bothered me over the years is seeing the number of AFF students who walk away after a couple of jumps. The Accelerated Freefall Program is a good program. But, it is "Accelerated" and as such is not for everyone.

The problem is that not everyone learns the same way. And, what it doesn't teach is knowledge confidence. Because it is performance-oriented training and it is accelerated, in some it teaches fear and anxiety. Its a lot of information in a short period of time.

Jen, here's what I propose. How about a "pause." Tell yourself you're not going to jump for two weeks. During that two weeks, please do the following:

1) Re-dive your last level at home each night. Visualize the exit, freefall, canopy opening, canopy control and landing.
2) Learn more about the gear. Harness tensile strengths, suspension line strengths, reserves, etc.
3) Watch people pack (well, good packers). Watch them several times.
4) Pay for and learn the next level, but tell the instructor you want to schedule the actual dive for a week later, then go home and each night practice and visualize the dive... Practice the ride to altitude, the exit, the dive flow, the canopy activation and deployment, your canopy control and the landing.
5) Finally, find a female mentor. Someone who will "walk & talk" with you and impart knowledge. That knowledge will give you more confidence and more confidence will lead to your next dive.

Remember, just cause its accelerated doesn't mean you have to do it at the DZ's pace, you can do it at your own. Feel free to take your time.

Finally, Ivan has a great suggestion... Ask your Instructor if you can do a "Level X" Dive. No stress, no hard dive flow. Just exit, one practice touch and feel it till pull time.

Feel free to email me directly for mentor suggestions or white papers and/or websites that you can read to help build that knowledge base.

[dreamsville 0]

I was scared as well, and I got through it by gutting it out. There were times on AFP that I wasn't sure I could make it. Jumps 6-8 of AFP were the hardest, and I had to repeat a couple of times. However, Paul Wold, Kirk Smith, and Doris Pfister helped me through these particular units by giving me great attention and coaching.

I still have qualms in the back of my mind once in a while, but most of the time is just joy. Take the suggestions about the tandem or the relaxation coach jump (the tandem might be better if you're really nervous). Go on from there with what your heart tells you.
|

I don't drink during the day, so I don't know what it is about this airline. I keep falling out the door of the plane.

Harry, FB #4143

[Rhonda66 0]

Oh man, was I ever scared during my first tandem and pretty much all the way through AFF. I was such a wuss pre-skydiving. I'll tell you that if you do stick it out, it will get better with time and it will give you a confidence in yourself that you never had before. Since skydiving, I became a private pilot and went back to school and got my BA. I feel like there is nothing I can't accomplish now and nothing that I will let fear keep me from trying at least once in my lifetime - I want to try everything and do everything I possibly can because life is just too short to let it pass right by.

As far as the fear goes, it's all mind over matter. Tell yourself "I can do this". Look at all of the people who are doing it and think about how much fun they are having. If they really thought it would kill them, they wouldn't be doing it - they do it for the fun and the rush of it! Push all of the bad thoughts away and concentrate clearly on the task at hand.

You couldn't be any worse off than I was and you sound like you handled your first few jumps much better than I did.

I freaked out during my first tandem. I was afraid of the plane and when we got out I just closed my eyes and pretended the freefall was a carnival ride. Under canopy, I swore the canopy was going to collapse. I also swore I would never torture myself like that again.

However, my husband came down from his tandem and thought it was the greatest thing ever - he signed up for AFF right away. I sat on the ground watching and worrying about him for nearly a year before it sunk in - I must have missed something on my first jump. I also realized the plane hadn't crashed and my husband wasn't dead after a year of jumping - no, he was actually enjoying this skydiving thing.

So I signed up for AFF too. I bombed level I twice!!! Freaked out and essentially went headdown while dragging my JMs. One JM actually told me "skydiving isn't for everyone" and that's when I was like "I have to get over this fear and just make my brain work or forget about it". I still continued to struggle with AFF, but I got through it eventually. Now the fear is finally all gone and I can really enjoy skydiving. It's really like riding a bicycle - once you get it, you got it and the fear just melts away.

Don't ever let fear overtake you because it doesn't do you any good to be afraid. It sounds to me like you CAN do this. Anything can happen - the plane *could* crash, you *could* have a malfunction - you *could* also get killed in a car accident at any moment, yet we all still drive. If you jump as safely as you can - make the extra effort to check your pins on exit, wear your helmet, jump with a Cypres, you can feel better knowing that you've taken every possible precaution to help minimize the risk of something bad happening to you.

If I could do it, so can you.

Rhonda
PP ASEL

[andy2 0]

this is coming from another student going through AFF at the moment, so take it with a grain of salt. My first few skydives were sort of tense, I wouldn't say I was terrified, but I definitely had a bit of healthy fear. I learned that I was much more relaxed when I asked EVERYTHING I could possibly think of to my instructors. I asked what this does, what this is for, etc etc. I asked about emergency procedures, clarified things in my mind, and generally just talked about skydiving. Instead of keeping quiet, like I know I am prone to do, I forced myself to voice my questions. This helped a lot, and I felt after I had done this much more in control, and that really is what fear is about, feeling out of control of your own life.

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let my inspiration flow,
in token rhyme suggesting rhythm...

[jumprunner 0]

Wow, sounds like you had a rough ride, congratulations on getting through it. Fear aint an easy thing to deal with for anyone.

I was just thinking about something last night. There are only a few skydiving fatalities per the amount of jumpers and jumps that take place, just like there are only a few fatalities in commercial airplane accidents per the amount of airplanes and flights that take place.

So skydiving does put you in a pretty dangerous position, no doublt about it. So does commercial flying. Lets say for now that there are more skydiving fatalities and accidents than commercial flying produces. So he who relies on statistics should be convinced that skydiving is a bad idea in comparison to commercial flying.

If a commercial aircraft is going down, you might have a cool head about it, realize that panicking does not do any good, and executing emergency procedures will save your life. Thats fine in that situation, only problem is, there really isnt anything you can do, other than to sit there and die. There isnt any emergency procedures for you to take, other than fasten your seatbelt, which probably wont do much good when the plane crashes.

Skydiving...there is ALWAYS something you can do, and you NEVER just have to "sit there and wait to die". You always have the opportunity to fight for your life. Maybe you will live, and maybe you wont, but it isnt a helpless situation. Some people may feel more comfortable with skydiving than commercial flying simply because of this, disregarding any statistics.

There are a lot of people who fly commercial, but only a very few who jump, because most people feel much more threatened when it comes to skydiving than they would when it comes to flying.

Now, my opinion? Give me a choice, and Id rather jump. Commercial aircraft are extremely dangerous, survivability in a crash is almost non-existant, they are subject to terrorist activity, security is very lax, and the airlines could care less about the safety of their passengers. They only want to make a little more money, and thats all they care about. This is just my own opinion, but I consider skydiving much safer than commercial flying, and if I have to go somewhere, I would much rather drive if possible.

There are so many people that will board a plane without even thinking about the dangers, but so few who will skydive thinking about nothing but the dangers.

[andy2 0]

[QUOTE]There isnt any emergency procedures for you to take, other than fasten your seatbelt, which probably wont do much good when the plane crashes.
[/QUOTE]

so true about airlines, thats why theyre so scary! Alternatively, imo, that's why skydiving is such a confidence builder, it places your life in your own hands and forces you to save yourself (pull).

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let my inspiration flow,
in token rhyme suggesting rhythm...

[steve1 5]

My first jumps were all static line so I guess I don't know what it feels like doing AFF for the first time. Your situation reminds me of a friend of mine who started AFF several years ago. Each night she would come home and cry to her husband, telling him she didn't want to die, and was really really scared. Today you wouldn't know this was the same gal. She has well over a thousand jumps. She's one of the most aggressive jumpers I know......Try to tough it out. Believe me, the fear will turn to pure fun eventually.

I have another friend who now has over 6,000 jumps. He was once on some world championship teams. When he first started he didn't even tell the relatives that he lived with that he was training to jump. He kept it a secret, because he didn't know if he could actually do it. It scared him that bad.

Probably the most inspirational story I've read recently was in skydiving news a month or so ago. This lady was scared to death of jumping. She'd go up in the airplane and had to ride it down each time, because she was too scared to jump. But she was no quitter. Finally she just got pissed off at herself and did it. And then did it again. Today she's one of the only females on the Pro-swooping circuit. (I'm terrible with names....I wish I could recall what it is.) At any rate, I'd say don't quit. You're already a jumper and I have made some jumps. If you quit now you'll spend the rest of your life wondering if you could have done it.

To tell you the truth my first static line jumps were all night jumps because my eyes were shut tight. It's nothing but fun now. I love every jump.....Steve1

[betzilla 56]

Quote

that's why skydiving is such a confidence builder, it places your life in your own hands and forces you to save yourself (pull).

That's what I loved most about skydiving when I started it.

[billvon 2,400]

> Commercial aircraft are extremely dangerous . . .

Compared to sitting in a bunker, perhaps, but they are still safer than driving no matter how you look at it.

> and the airlines could care less about the safety of their
> passengers. They only want to make a little more money, and thats
> all they care about.

One could say that DZO's care only about making a little more money, and be just as right (i.e. not right at all.)

>if I have to go somewhere, I would much rather drive if possible.

And take that much greater risk of dying. Which is fine, but you should be realistic about the dangers.

>There are so many people that will board a plane without even
> thinking about the dangers, but so few who will skydive thinking
> about nothing but the dangers.

I think most people accept the (low) risk of death due to flying, but do not want to accept the (relatively high) risk of dying while skydiving. Skydiving is not a safe sport; flying is a very safe way to get around. For people averse to risk, flying but not skydiving may well make a lot of sense.

[jumprunner 0]

I think most people accept the (low) risk of death due to flying, but do not want to accept the (relatively high) risk of dying while skydiving. Skydiving is not a safe sport; flying is a very safe way to get around. For people averse to risk, flying but not skydiving may well make a lot of sense.


Alaskan Airlines jet, crashes into the Pacific killing everyone on board.

Terrorist attacks bring two airliners into the World Trade Center, killing everyone on board.

Terrorist attack results in airliner crashing somewhere near Washington DC, killing everyone on board. Some of these people were calling thier relatives to say goodbye.

In the early 90s, another airliner crashes into the Atlantic shortly after takeoff, killing everyone on board.

I have spent my life hearing about airliner crashes, over and over and over again, throughout the years, and almost every time, no one survives. Yet I have always seen this being "downplayed" by the airlines, who continue to do absolutely nothing to make plane trips safer.

And Im supposed to believe that commercial flying is safe? Ive driven my car for over 15 years now, mostly in a large conjested city, and I have had not one single accident to date. I can keep myself from getting into an accident, I can avoid accidents, and if Im headed for a collision I can manuever out of an accident (which has happened a few times to date).

We have recently seen the liberal profile in this country dispute letting airline pilots carry firearms to prevent terrorist attacks onboard aircraft, so we are supposed to believe that terrorists with guns are a lot safer than pilots with guns.

I know skydiving is dangerous, but like driving, you can take whatever actions to try to get out of a death situation. Not that its easy, but you still have that option. In a commercial airliner, the only option you have is that you hope you didnt get on the wrong plane that day.

Im not just drawing an anology here, personally, I will not fly commercial aircraft if I can at all help it. Sure, I can get nervous before exiting a plane, but I get a lot more nervous from having to sit in an airliner.

I can fully understand your points on skydiving however, especially on the DZOs, and like said in the first post, it puts you in a pretty dangerous situation. I always stick up for myself at a DZ, when I dont like something, I either dont jump or I can be a real pain in the ass about it. And maybe I dont make too many friends there, but Im not there for that, Im there to jump, and then walk off the DZ alive. Thats the way I handle things and I feel pretty secure with it.

On commercial airliners, you dont have those kind of options, your only options are to get on the plane and hope for the best, or dont get on it at all.

[jumprunner 0]

Quote

[QUOTE]There isnt any emergency procedures for you to take, other than fasten your seatbelt, which probably wont do much good when the plane crashes.
[/QUOTE]

so true about airlines, thats why theyre so scary! Alternatively, imo, that's why skydiving is such a confidence builder, it places your life in your own hands and forces you to save yourself (pull).

Thank you. I absolutely could not agree with you more, you took the thoughts right out of my mind.

Very, very well put. Its a great confidence builder, and gets you used to the idea of taking action to save yourself in any other type of situation.

[billvon 2,400]

>I have spent my life hearing about airliner crashes, over and over
> and over again, throughout the years . . .

That's because you read the popular media, and they like really bad accidents. If you want to read about the incidents that happen far more often where no one gets hurt, read the NTSB website. Look up the Gimli Glider story if you think that death and destruction are inevitable when the shit hits the fan. Those kinds of stories are far more common than the fatal accidents but no one hears about them because they're not as interesting.

>Ive driven my car for over 15 years now, mostly in a large conjested
>city, and I have had not one single accident to date.

I've driven at least a million miles in my life, and have been in 3 accidents, none serious. I've flown a few thousand hours in small planes as pilot and skydiver, and been in one helicopter crash, three or four close calls, and watched one small airplane crash that claimed the life of the pilot. I've probably been on 600 airline/small business jet flights - no serious incidents.

>And Im supposed to believe that commercial flying is safe?

You don't have to believe it if you don't want to - you have a car; you can drive if you want. But hearing a non-pilot claim that commercial aviation is really dangerous is on par with hearing a whuffo claim that skydiving is nearly always fatal - didn't you hear about that guy whose reserve failed to open?

The numbers don't lie, and they say that you are much, much more likely to get killed driving to a given destination than flying commercially there. You may prefer to risk death while driving, since you are more in control there, but the stats simply don't support that that's safer.

[JenBubbles 0]

Well you guys really made me laugh with your argument about which is more dangerous - driving yr car, flying in a plane or jumping out of one!! Trying to decide how dangerous skydiving iis compared with other things in life, including flying in a commercial aircraft, isnt the biggest issue I need to overcome myself - I hvae thought about that of course, but in th end it's not what holds me back. There are many things in life which can potentially be very dangerous. We all make choices about what we choose to do, but even so, none of us can predict the big one. My worst fear is not that i might die jumping out of a plane, but that i will panic and not do the right thing. I know this is quite irrational, as i have not panicked yet in the 4 jumps i have done -well, i did feel panicked in freefall in AFF2, but I did what i was supposed to do and even did an extra handle touch just to reassure myself. For me, the struggle is allowing myself to pursue a sport which can potentially be dangerous, when i have never been a risk-taker before (although have never been afraid of flying in a commercial airline!). It is also learning how to overcome my fear of my own fear - which is actually the biggest challenge for me. And it is learning that i am perfectly capable of doing what i need to to keep myself safe and respond in an emergency situation. When i first started, I felt freaked that i had to be my own back-up, no-one else was going to be able to take that ultimate responsibility for my life. Now i understand a bit more that knowing about my equipment is important and rehearsing what to do, emergency procedures etc.
What i want to be able to do is to feel as calm as i do in a commercial plane - yes, i know something could go wrong, but am not going to waste my energy making myself anxious that something will go wrong, i will just do what i need to do.
And for anyone else reading this who has already contributed comments in response to my original posting, i really appreciate al your encouragement and useful tips. Not sure when my next jump will be, but am not content to walk away yet!

[jumprunner 0]

Naw, we werent arguing, we were discussing. But that is right, I am a non-pilot but not totally whuffo on that end. When I was 17 I had a solo license and used to fly these Cessna 160s (160 if I remember correctly), anyway they were tiny single engine props. I think I had just over 20 hours before I quit.

I quit when, one day, I was doing touch and go's when a storm was blowing in, but not quite on us yet. Something caused the plane to go out of control, the controls wouldnt respond. After that I developed a fear of flying pretty much anything.

Im pretty paranoid of flying and must be the only person in the world who feels safer jumping out of the airplane than riding in it