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stilettodude

FUNNY INCIDENTS IN FREEFALL.

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Has anyone experienced a funny incident in freefall. I will start it off......once on a night jump we had glow sticks which we held in our mouths during freefall so we could check our altimeters. During freefall a friend of mine bit down on the glow stick too hard and busted the plastic tube:o. Maybe its one of those things where you had to be there but you should have seen how the wind streaked his face with the glowing green formula:D.


"HOW LOW CAN YOU GO?"

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it's a little embarassing, but i'm sure it happened to a lot of us ;):$

i had a cold, but decided to jump anyway. and during the jump, the wind sucked out everything i had in my nose and throwed it on my goggles :ph34r:


Check out the site of the Fallen Angels FreeflY Organisation:
http://www.padliangeli.org

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Had a student once that used to get so nervous before every jump, he'd throw up first (which he kept hidden from me). One jump he didn't throw up first, so he thought he was over it. Well, he couldn't hide it from me that time...he threw up in freefall. Looked pretty much like you described the glow stick, except a little more disgusting.

Rock

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I heard about one TM here, who looked over his tudents shoulder and into his face to ask if he was doing okay. This was just in time for the student to turn his head and barf INTO the TM's mouth.>:(:S:(

I don't know whether that was just a tale, but I can totally picture it happenening to that TM. :P

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Had a guy prove that Hostess Snow Balls are bite size. No one saw him do it, but he stuffed a whole one in his mouth prior to getting out of the plane, and then after we got stable, he showed us. If you don't know what's going in, it's very interesting to watch a pink thing crawl out of someone's mouth in freefall. Eventually it was funny.
Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics.

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That's one reason why I wear a full face helmet now! HAHAHA!!:D:D:D:D

I had the zipper on my jumpsuit bust open in freefall once, and I was wearing a bikini top underneath. I was totally embarassed, but the guy I was jumping with started laughing so hard! He thought it was great! [:/] :D:D:D:D

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instructor watching from the door of the plane as i do my first hop-n-pop. i let go, wait a few seconds, reach for the ripcord and pull and relax. i dont feel the snap of the chute open, so i look at my right hand and its empty. with the deer in the headlights look on my face and a homer simpson scream, i frantically pull the ripcord again, making sure i have a deathgrip on it this time. he was still in tears, literally, when he landed after me. that was a good 6 months ago and we still laughed about it yesterday.


doug
hey, i was stupid before stupid was cool!

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Two way freefly with my friend Clark. We are taking turns doing linked transitions..start off both head down, he flips to a sit without breaking the grip, now it's my turn. I flip over andplace my groin firmly on his knee. I broke the grip, clutched my groin and closed my eyes for a second.

I expected to see, when I opened my eyes, a concerned look on Clark's face. Instead, he was pointing and laughing hysterically at me.

Not one of my finer moments.

Methane Freefly - got stink?

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During a 4way, a buddy gets this really weird look on his face and tracks away...we're at 7 grand!
He lands way off the airport...but we can see him and he looks okay, he's walking back in...
An hour later I see him packing as he explains...trying to hard to be fast, his bowels let go!
The funniest part was how he detailed the effects of a stiff opening shock :|
...later that day I signed his log book, he wrote...
"DUMPED HIGH!" :)










~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

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The funniest thing was watching the DZO try to ride one of those catapillar (sp) pool toys. He tried to exit on top of it but went right over and started spinning. Finally, he got off of it and held it in his left hand and deployed with his right hand, I thought that was kind of scary.
Then there was the first time I caught the skyball, I was so excited that I threw it back way too hard and hit my buddy right in the face with it, now that was funny.

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Ah, yes. There was the time we jumps a stuffed red alligator. I was just doing video. As I tried to dive along side it (scared to be over the top), it disintegrated before I could even get close. There was a big puff of white stuffing coming out of it as it blew open shortly after exit.

The stuffing reminded me of when we scattered Henry Bivins's (Chicago area) ashes after he died of a heart attack in bed in 2001 (God rest him). The stuffing was larger, though, since Henry's ashes had been divided up amongst a number of groups so his friends could share the tribute.
|
I don't drink during the day, so I don't know what it is about this airline. I keep falling out the door of the plane.

Harry, FB #4143

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We had a parent let there 4 year old get loose at the DZ one day when everyone was landing. Well a good buddy of mine Vern saw the kid and decided to have some fun. He swooped in and the kid froze like a deer in head light as he saw Vern come screaming at him. Well Vern touched down and started running toward the kid picking him up as he ran. The kid screamed as if he was going to die it was so funny.


CSA #699 Muff #3804

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As a jump pilot, hearing the tandem master tell a female student to "Turn around, get on your knees, and bend over." This was promptly followed by her saying "Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!" repeatedly. (She got scared once she could see out the window).

Once the door opened, she started screaming and grabbing at stuff. The TM asked for a cut and I told him that I couldn't because she had grabbed my right thumb after I took her hand off of the control yolk. Then, when they finally got out, I actually heard her scream for about a second after they went out the door!

When asked on the ground what she thought, she said it was the best thing ever...

--------
Benefitting from the 'free capture of verticality.'

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One beautiful sunny day we are in a four way star. Everything seems normal until Charlies goggles come off. Having had this happen myself I think nothing of it. Until about two seconds later when we see something else fly off of Charlies face. Still not sure what had just happend, Charlie turns and tracks away high. I'm thinking "hey jerk get back here and finish this skydive, they are not free you know!" Well after we land we realize that it just wasn't the dry eyes Charlie was worried about. He had a glass eye that didn't fit to well. Once the goggles came off, out came his eye! So if you are ever over Sanderson Field in Wa. and get the felling you are being watched don't worry it's just one eyed Charlies other eye.
Dom


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They needed one more person to fill the load (182 -C) for Tandem/student/camera/ME.
The guy had his buddies there and they were filming and pictures and he wanted to show the rest of his friends how cool it is with his New Video of him jumping.
It was the week before Halloween and at the last minute, I put on My "Whinnie-The-Pooh" suit and jumped in. Now he has a 6' Pooh Bear thru ALL of his Videos & pics!:P ('Just had to soften up the tough guy)
-Grant
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If I could be a Super Hero,
I chose to be: "GRANT-A-CLAUS". and work 365 days a Year.
http://www.hangout.no/speednews/

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We had a 4-way team mascot- a rubber blow-up doll; Mercedes the Wonder Doll-- she had hand-drawn nipples, a donated jump suit and goggles, on the ride to altitude, and with the help of a particularly sick unnamed individual that manipulated her arms and body with disturbing abandon, she competed in a best of the breast contest with an unnamed female jumper doing a rites-of-summer (naked) jump-B| The pilot's reaction to the double disrobings was almost as funny as Mercedes' unpredictability in freefall- she was just a bit under-inflated at exit altitude due to the effects of the contest and proceded to throw the jumpers for loops as she floated like hell and her arms and legs whipped around wildly....-:ph34r:

Brokeneagle.
I'm really very gentle, no matter what my kung-fu teacher says... he is giving me a reputation I do not deserve!

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Had a student once that used to get so nervous before every jump, he'd throw up first (which he kept hidden from me). One jump he didn't throw up first, so he thought he was over it. Well, he couldn't hide it from me that time...he threw up in freefall. Looked pretty much like you described the glow stick, except a little more disgusting.
Rock




After being threatned with a green chili burrito, I held out on that during freefall. It wasnt nerves, its the spinning around that does it.

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I heard about one TM here, who looked over his tudents shoulder and into his face to ask if he was doing okay. This was just in time for the student to turn his head and barf INTO the TM's mouth :P




Welp, guess that awnsered that question!

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Weekend before last I dropped my helmet in the mud and took out my dytter to wash the helmut up.
Well I handed my dytter to a friend and 10 minutes later I get it back from him put it back in my helmut and dirtdive a 15 way.
Get on the plane...go to altitude get out and the dive is going great we turn all our points and are just holding the formation...all of a sudden I hear my 1500 alarm going off just whirling away...I quickly look at my altimeter...6000 ft...hmmm look at everyone else in jump they were all calm and collected look at ground and it still small. I just figure battery was going dead or something. I land return to packing area and ask some guys standing around if that was a sympton of a dead battery and they all just look at me but my friend has this grin on his face....He had set all three sirens to 6000 feet so of course...the lowest one prevails....fun fun fun. Everyone got a good laugh out of it including me...Friend said my face was hysterical.
Chip

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i guess some of the coolest funny jumps i've done are:

1) a 4-way exit base for a 20-way where one guy dives through the center of the 4-way STAR on the hill.

2) Mr. Bill jump attempts where you can't hang on and your partner is in like 25 line twists and kicking out of them while you fall away on your back

3) rodeo dive attempts where you have to go headdown to keep up with the pair because when they mount, they fall out of sight.

4) EVERY JUMP IS FUN!

jg
"dude, where's my main?"

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I had a friend who had just purchased a new jumpsuit, and for a three-way dive a horny gorilla was proposed. But for some reason Mr. NewJumpsuit had the weird idea that if he got onto his back in the new jumpsuit, that he would spin out of control and not be able to recover. We knew that wasn't true, because the guy had over 1,000 jumps at the time. But in deference to his fear, the plan for a horny gorilla was cast aside, and a conventional RW dive planned.

Then, unbeknownst to NewJumpsuit, the other jumper and myself got together and came up with a secret plan; at a certain altitude during the RW sequence, we would take crossed-arm side-dock grips on NewJumpsuit, and then on cue, uncross our arms, flipping NewJumpsuit upside down, and hold him there between us, on his back.

The dive went as planned. When we took the side docks, which were not part of the RW plan, NewJumpsuit looked at us quizzically, wondering what was going on. Then we flipped NewJumpsuit upside-down, and his eyes got really big, and he started flailing with his arms and legs, flopping like a beached fish, trying to get loose.

After a couple of seconds we released him, and sure enough, he immediately and effortlessly flipped back upright again.

On the ground, he was a very good sport about the freefall surprise, took it well, and laughed with us.

This may seem a little cruel, but his unreasonable fear needed to be cured.

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Lost a hoola hoop on a dive this past weekend due to an un-named jumper taking me and the hoola out:)
skygod7777 had his pants come down on a sit fly and on camera mooned the video as he tried to pull his shorts back up..
-yoshi
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this space for rent.

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