Favorite one-liners or routine for tandem interviews.

[agent_lead 0]

"if the worst should happen...dont follow me...walk TOWARDS the light.."

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[Feeblemind 1]

TM: Okay plan "A" is we exit the aircraft, have a great time flying through the sky, deploy the main parachute and fly back here.

Passenger: Okay
TM: Should something go wrong with plan "A", by this I mean an issue with the main parachute, I will tell you to cross your arms and arch! At this time I will cut away the the main parachute and deploy the reserve parachute, we will then fly back here.

Passenger: okay we did all that and plan "B" doesn't work, what is plan "C"?

TM: Stand up, dust yourself off and walk into the light!

Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

[Peej 0]

There are a few that we've been using lately that i quite like:

TM: Did you know that we offer two types of tandems here? Mild and Extreme.

Passenger: Really?

TM: Yeah, on the normal one we exit the aircraft, do a few flips, open the parachute and fly to the landing area.

Passenger: What's the extreme version?

TM: Well, we et up to altitude, open the door. You jump out and a few seconds after you, the cameraman and i will follow you out and we cath you in freefall, hook up and land.

You'l be surprised how many passengers rekon they'd like to try it

Another one my TM uses in his briefing is:

"If at any point you want to back out, that's ok, i'll just turn us around and we'll go backwards out the door, either way we're leaving the aeroplane....

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[sdctlc 0]

Always fun to tell the student that if they decide they dont want to go after the door opens up, just yell NO. I will most likely hear GO due to the wind noise and we are off!

Scott C.

"He who Hesitates Shall Inherit the Earth!"

[Peej 0]

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Always fun to tell the student that if they decide they dont want to go after the door opens up, just yell NO. I will most likely hear GO due to the wind noise and we are off!

Scott C.

We use that too!

'cept we tell 'em if they shout NO NO NO in the door it sounds like GO GO GO and HELL NO! sounds like GERONIMO!

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[sdctlc 0]

Well, I have not heard the Geronima one, that might get used some now!. I noted a single NO but often like you noted it is more along the lines of NO No No = Go Go Go!

Scott C.

"He who Hesitates Shall Inherit the Earth!"

[justinb138 0]

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TM: Well, we et up to altitude, open the door. You jump out and a few seconds after you, the cameraman and i will follow you out and we cath you in freefall, hook up and land.

Now that's talent!, although it may be a bit painful for the student.

[teason 0]

When reminding a male student arch:

"When we roll out the plane, I'm gonna be arching like a mother, so unless you want to feel my junk in your back, you better be arching too!"


Arches have improved with my male students

I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet.

[SkyNerd87 0]

Vidiot to female tandem as she's getting strapped to TM: "Be sure and jiggle around a lot for a better fit."

aka Wag-Tail, ChangoEnLosPantalones Rodriguez, Sonic Skyjew
"Just remember... don't fuck up."
Shake 'n Bake!

[SkyPsycho 0]

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**BUMP**

grab the connection points on the students harness and show them to them. tell them they could have gotten the good metal ones for an extra 20 bucks.

or say to them.........listen, when we jump you may notice theres alot of screaming or crying...................just slap me.

_______________________________
HK MP5SD.........silence is golden

[wildman2231 0]

on my 1st tandem jump, the vidiot asks me in the plane, so your ready to go huh?
me: oh yea , I'm ready! (smiling)
him: Oh yea you'll be just fine!
...as my TM is holding up my shoulder hooks and puts her hands over mouth as if in disbelief!
And on my lvl 6 jump, my instructor actually told me
he really wasn't an instructor,BUT he DID stay at a
Holiday Inn Express last night. lol like the commercial

I'm fine...crazy people don't know they're crazy...No,Really!

[rj2163 0]

Me at my first tandem: Hi, I'm Rob, how you doing?

TM: (shrugs) I'm a little depressed.

Warning: this is a SCUBA joke but it's one of my favorites. I get the impression a lot of skydivers also SCUBA and have probably heard a variation of this conversation with my non-SCUBA, non-skydiving sister a couple weeks ago - she walked right into it.

Sister: I'd do a tandem jump but I won't SCUBA dive.

Me: Why?

Sister: I'm terrified of being eaten by a shark.

Me: That's just not going to happen and I'll even give you the knife.

Sister: What's a little knife going to do to a big shark!?

Me: the knife's not to stab the shark, it's to stab your buddy. (me in this case )

[Skyliber 0]

My friend's TM said during the freefall a few seconds before he pulls said " What's this do?"

-=+ Skyliber, Disynthegrate, & Nucleaire +=-

[Zipp0 1]

About a year ago I took an observation flight up to watch the action. So I have a parachute strapped to my back for the first time and get on the plane. As we lift off I am told "If the pilot jumps, you jump."

I laughed heartily, until I realized it was not a joke.

Zipp0

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Chuck Norris doesn't do push-ups, he pushes the Earth down.

[Peej 0]

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TM: Well, we et up to altitude, open the door. You jump out and a few seconds after you, the cameraman and i will follow you out and we cath you in freefall, hook up and land.

Now that's talent!, although it may be a bit painful for the student.

No one likes a wiseass!

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[Peej 0]

I've also been getting a real kick out of reading them the the warning label on the back of the harness when they are kitted up and at boarding point, ready to hop on the plane. I ask them to stand still, read it to them and then ask them their final thoughts before we board. I've got some classic reactions that way.

edited to add:

When they're finished getting geared up and are ready to go i ask them to step to one side so i can take some stills of them and their family/ boyfriend or whoever.

I say: "Do you wanna just step over here so i can get a few pics, nothing serious, it's just so we know what you look like, incase we lose you"

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[TrickyDicky 0]

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I've also been getting a real kick out of reading them the the warning label on the back of the harness when they are kitted up and at boarding point, ready to hop on the plane. I ask them to stand still, read it to them and then ask them their final thoughts before we board. I've got some classic reactions that way.

I know someone who had the "skydiving may cause serious injury or death" cypres sticker (with the cypres bit removed) stuck to his helmet just underneath his stills camera, so his subjects could read it in freefall :)

UK Skydiver for all your UK skydiving needs.

[Peej 0]

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I've also been getting a real kick out of reading them the the warning label on the back of the harness when they are kitted up and at boarding point, ready to hop on the plane. I ask them to stand still, read it to them and then ask them their final thoughts before we board. I've got some classic reactions that way.

I know someone who had the "skydiving may cause serious injury or death" cypres sticker (with the cypres bit removed) stuck to his helmet just underneath his stills camera, so his subjects could read it in freefall :)

Brilliant! I doubt most tandem passengers would be aware enough to read it though, but other skydivers, cool!

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[weegegirl 2]

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I've also been getting a real kick out of reading them the the warning label on the back of the harness when they are kitted up and at boarding point, ready to hop on the plane. I ask them to stand still, read it to them and then ask them their final thoughts before we board. I've got some classic reactions that way.

I know someone who had the "skydiving may cause serious injury or death" cypres sticker (with the cypres bit removed) stuck to his helmet just underneath his stills camera, so his subjects could read it in freefall :)

I have a "Fuck You You Fucking Fuck" sticker under my still. But I'm afraid the laughter will someday turn to offense, so I'm going to have to remove it soon. However, it's worked so far.

[D.B.Cooper 0]

A friend of mine did a tandem once. In the plane, the TM suddenly stared at the hooks or something with a look of disbelief on his face and said : "fuck I can't believe we were gonna let you jump like that !"

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About a year ago I took an observation flight up to watch the action. So I have a parachute strapped to my back for the first time and get on the plane. As we lift off I am told "If the pilot jumps, you jump."

I laughed heartily, until I realized it was not a joke.

Well I am laughing heartily !!!!!!


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"I have a bomb in my briefcase. I will use it if necessary. I want you to sit next to me. You are being hijacked."