back in the air

[firstime 0]

I recently made a post about my 1st mal in the incidents
forum under "lucky & stupid". Since that jump I have done
only 2 since 5/27 ( the day of the mal) plus 30 days to
get my canopy back from PD. So lets go with 6/27. Why
do I have this apprehensive feeling. I have done just 2 jumps since 6/27. I need a major kick in the ass beacause I keep telling myself that I dealt with a malfunction (nasty one) and I fixed it before going in.
So why is it still wrecking my confidence. This really sucks.
Is this a normal feeling????? Help

[DSE 3]

Dunno what to tell you is "normal," I'll leave that to the 4-digit jumpers cuz I'm a triple digit midget.
But I'll tell you that having a premie opening that slammed me into the body of the plane had me thinking "what the hell am I doing here?" for the next few jumps.
Then there was the day that I didn't correctly thread my chest. Another several jumps of "Hey stupid, do you really think you should be doing this?" Look below, and see the thread of "Should I take up golf?"
I also had a mal on my first tandem ride, but that didn't scare me, it just taught me respect for EP's.

If it's fear, then maybe rethink the activity. If it's apprehension, I'd submit it's completely normal. Most folks know that touching a hot stove is painful after the first time, but given a few experiences around the stove, they learn what to do in order to enjoy the stove, but avoid the pain.

[monkycndo 0]

Normal? Yep. It is your brain telling you that jumping out of an airplane is not normal. But you already knew that. I had an incident where I lost altitude awareness and ended up pulling low. Due to a longer than normal snivel, low enough for my cypres to fire. I had two out and ended up landing them both off the LZ in a tiny side yard. At the time, it really didn't scare me that much. I just followed the EPs that had been banged into my head by my FJC instructor. I waited until I had my rig back together (3 weeks) before I got back in the air. But those first few jumps were a bit hair raising.(Take a peak at my avatar). Those feelings slowly went away. I now consider the event something that will probably save my life someday, if it hasn't already. I am in that dangerous jump number zone of 200-500 jumps where skydivers often feel cocky and try new things beyond their ability and forget the simple safety preparations like asking for gear checks. I am very altitude aware and drill my EPs on every jump. I like to think I am a conservative jumper. I remind myself that forgetting the basics can kill. You have proven you can handle an emergency. Look at what happened as something to be proud of because you saved your own life. Start off with simple jumps and build on the success. Your confidence will follow.

And besides, golf sucks.

50 donations so far. Give it a try.

You know you want to spank it
Jump an Infinity

[BIGUN 1,053]

It takes time and jumps to desensitize one's self after such an occurence. You "might" want to make some solo sunset HnP's or other easy no stress dives till you feel comfortable and confident again. Being a little apprehensive is healthy and normal.

Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard.

[Mostly_Harmless 0]

Larry,
I think it's normal to be apprehensive about jumping after the crap you went through. You handled it and more importantly you survived it. The fact that you have jumped since then is a good sign and it might just take some time before you are in full flight. Do what you always do, come down to the dropzone talk to everyone and if you are up for it then jump. You know how you got yourself into that situation. Maybe you just need to make a few jumps and do a bunch of practice pulls. If you need someone to jump with just let me know, I would have no problem making a few jumps with you, just remind me to bring my welding helmet so I can look directly at your jumpsuit

_________________________________________
www.myspace.com/termvelocity

[NWFlyer 2]

Well, if it's not normal, then I'm not normal (wait, now, let's not get into a debate about that ).

I had a similarly scary wake up call on Memorial Day weekend. It took me three weeks to get my gear back together, during which time I managed to freak myself out pretty good.

The following two weekends I made excuses not to jump. Granted, they were good excuses (very hot conditions at unfamiliar dropzones, leading to very fast landing conditions, and landing's never been my strong suit), but still... I made excuses.

Finally five weeks after the incident I found myself at a familiar DZ with good weather conditions and I ran out of excuses. And yet people in the plane with me (one of whom was a former instructor of mine) said I looked like I was a student again - I had that level of anxiety and nerves.

I did a *very* simple two-way with no real goal except stay near each other in the air, I pulled high, and I pulled in place - I made the skydive so ridiculously simple so there was really nothing my brain could overload on. I've kept it simple when I've jumped since then (only a few more times) and my anxiety level is going down to the point where it's almost back to "normal" levels for me. But it's taking a while.

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[popsjumper 2]

So you handled a mal successfully....good stuff.

THAT is a confidence builder.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[kstro5 0]

Yeah, congrats on handling the mal so well!
A friend of mine still in AFF (with 4 jumps total) had a cut away a while back and she handled it like a pro. When she got down she said it helped her confidence levels a ton!
I would never wish to have a mal, but I can imagine it does help when you know you can handle the situation!

My only time of being at total peace is when im in freefall and flying my canopy safely to the ground! Skydiving has honestly and truly saved my life!

[firstime 0]

Thanks for your words of wisdom, it without a doubt made
a difference. The response from all pretty much said
"just get the F$%k Thanks, I need that, from you,... my group

[kstro5 0]

Just glad you got back in the air afterall!
It has been a couple of weeks since I last jumped and im very anxious to go this weekend hopefully if the weather holds up, but i know I will be a little more nervous than usual with it being a while since my last one. It's kinda like learning to walk all over again....I get nervous on the ride up, feeling just like I did when i was a terrified student but it's all good once i get out the door, then it's just an awesome ride!

My only time of being at total peace is when im in freefall and flying my canopy safely to the ground! Skydiving has honestly and truly saved my life!