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gravitywhore

Unsupportive wife

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Trying to strike a balance is the key. I know you love the sport, but your family should take priority over that. At the same time, you need to do something for yourself. If skydiving brings you joy, you should be able to skydive at least part of the time.

Kids grow up fast. Perhaps you will be able to skydive more when they are on their own. Involve your family in skydiving if you can. There are some drop zones and some jumpers who you might not want your kids around though....Steve1

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Her argument is that it is expensive and it takes me away from the house on weekends and some weekdays and that it is dangerous .


She has valid points...

We all have to follow our own paths.
Some skydivers, no, many skydivers have really serious life issues and without skydiving for release end up in all kinds of insane situations, so skydiving is not a choice or a hobby. If you are one of us, ummmm I mean those types then freefall will call you and you will fall into line like a compass points north...
Mykel AFF-I10
Skydiving Priorities: 1) Open Canopy. 2) Land Safely. 3) Don’t hurt anyone. 4) Repeat…

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We all have to follow our own paths.
Some skydivers, no, many skydivers have really serious life issues and without skydiving for release end up in all kinds of insane situations, so skydiving is not a choice or a hobby. If you are one of us, ummmm I mean those types then freefall will call you and you will fall into line like a compass points north...



Totally, my lady knows I get gradually more depressed the more days go by between jumps. One week Im pissy. Two weeks I'm not even worth talking to. I guess I am blessed to have a lady that read the entire SIM and browses here just to learn more about my world.

One time she bought me a new neptune battery pre-emtpively when she saw my current was half-empty. I had to put-out :)

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I'm lucky, My wife and I met on the DZ, she was a new student and I had been jumping for awhile, I still jump when I can, not as much as before having a kid. That's when she stopped jumping. He's been going out to the DZ from his first month. She know's It's a big part of who I am, And she knows the old saying, " I was jumpin before I met ya, and I'll be jumping long after your gone,...."



Only the good die young, so I have found immortality,

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Hi,

I am a stay-at-home mother of two and I homeschool both of them. I didn't start skydiving until I had been married about 10 years, so going to the dz every weekend and banging out a ton of jumps has never been an option for me, but I'm actually kinda glad, because it keeps things in perspective. I only go jumping about two days out of the month, and do 4 jumps (at the most) each time. Since I spend every day during the week teaching my kids and taking care of the home, it is quite easy for my husband to understand and be okay with giving me a couple of days out of the month. Plus he enjoys having some son/daddy time.

As most have said, it IS all about balance. I do not get upset because I can't go jumping every weekend because I'm just so thrilled I get to skydive at all. I'm glad I found it.

Do you think your wife would feel better if there was some way she could get away and get a release? I only ask that because I don't know your whole situation. Good luck and take care.
Mrs. WaltAppel

All things work together for good to them that love God...Romans 8:28

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I'm happy to hear that is working for you ... I have had my 7 year old up there and it never ends well .
there are a group of boys a bit older than him around 10 and 11 that are always up there and do not want to play with my son because he is younger and this creates tension and my wife is left as the referee
...So we decided he will not be coming back up until he is older or the crowd changes as it always does and the other boys are not an issue ... my 15 year old loves being at the DZ and is eager to learn and hang out .



Yeah. Maybe also something to consider is that especially with young kids, being at the DZ all weekend, every weekend - even if they do have fun there - is maybe not the best thing for the kids either. Kids need to do some normal kid stuff on the weekends too. Again, it's all about balance, for them as well as you.
Skydiving: wasting fossil fuels just for fun.

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I have some happily married male friends who jump every other weekend and the alternate weekends they do what their kids want to do. Sometimes they go hiking, biking, climbing, etc...but that is fair balance in my opinion and the SO is content with that.





_________________________________________

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jump every other weekend and the alternate weekends they do what their kids want to do

Which won't work if his wife starts an activity of her own that takes her away from the kids. Then it goes to every third weekend.

Some people don't like to plan weekends (I'm one of them). But some situations just require it, laying out ahead of time a rough plan, and adjusting as needed for weather and illness and the like.

As long as you both want to make it work for everyone, it's very possible. You're not going to end up being the world champion skygod on that schedule, but families often aren't compatible with that goal for ANY sport. Do fun stuff with your family, and have a couple of rainy-weather fun things that you can always resort to -- roller skating, bowling (take a couple of friends along), movies, or even (gasp) shopping.

Wendy W.
There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

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the 15 year old is her Daughter from a previous relationship ...



Oh, it's a girl? Stop bringing her to the dz, they're probably already counting down the days until she's 18!
She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

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I guess it's different for me because I am at home most of the time, and can make an excellent case for needing to do my own thing two days out of the month. My husband works 5 days a week, so he kinda likes hanging around the house occasionally, and welcomes the alone father/son time. I think it would be quite different if I worked full time and didn't see my kids that much. I hope you can find a solution that is okay with both of you.

Good luck.
Mrs. WaltAppel

All things work together for good to them that love God...Romans 8:28

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First jump was 1977 (military) Loved it -- Made lots of jumps for 3 years. Then as you stated, "Life got in the way" Raised 4 kids until they were out of the home. At 46 I went back up. In the past 6+ years I have made 1400+ jumps, earned my PRO, coach rating, IAD I , TM, and filmed over 800 jumps as a vidiot. The sky was still there, and I enjoy it as much as I did as a young man. Did I miss it? Sure! But I wouldn't trade one minute of being with my kids in all their activities instead.

BTW, my wife is very supportive of me in my endeavor. It helps that she has developed good friends, hobbies and other interests that keep her busy while I'm at the DZ.

steveOrino

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But I wouldn't trade one minute of being with my kids in all their activities instead.


....................................................................
I wish more parents had that attitude.

Being a parent puts a whole new spin on things. When my kids were young, I was sometimes was occaisionally selfish with my time. I probably should have spent more time with my wife and kids. This can really affect a kid and your marriage in a negative way.

Probably the greatest gift you can give a kid is your time. So many parents are so busy working and then doing their own things for fun, that there isn't time left for family. Finding a balance in such a crazy world isn't easy....Steve1

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I took 13 years off. I don't regret a second of it. And nope, the sky didn't go anywhere for me either. I don't even regret not buying a PC when I had 30 jumps now :P (believe me, I did at one time :o)

And my son, now almost 24, still calls me wanting to do dinner with me sometimes.

Life is good.

Wendy W.

There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

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....she is also worried that I am going to run off with a skydiving chicky ....



Believe me....skydivin' ain't the problem. I went through exactly the same, except I had 3 kids and wasn't jumping yet. It was never the job, the sports, the friends or a family time issue. Jealousy, especially the across-the-board kind, really kills everything....eventually. You sure you didn't marry my ex?!

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the 15 year old is her Daughter from a previous relationship ...



Oh, it's a girl? Stop bringing her to the dz, they're probably already counting down the days until she's 18!


have we met yet!?

that post made me laugh hard.. :D:ph34r::D:ph34r:
“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.”
-Hunter S. Thompson
"No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try."
-Yoda

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Her argument is that it is expensive and it takes me away from the house on weekends and some weekdays and that it is dangerous .




There have been many posts by men in similar situations.
As the man of the house, you must exert yourself by informing your spouse that she will not dictate your choice of lifestyle.

List all the things that make you an adult.

1) You pay the bills
2) Work a job
3) Raise your kids
4) Own a house

If she continues to bitch, tell her that she has 2 children that she can mother all she wants.

In the meantime, grow a set of balls and don’t get pushed around by someone who’s taken a vow to respect and obey your wishes.

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