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FallsLikeABrick

Anyone else have "friends" who get mad when you skydive?

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Kind of a silly question if you ask me, but I honestly have had tons of trouble with this. Here's the story:

I have been interested in skydiving since I can remember. When my best friend turned 18 in 2008, we both did a tandem for the first time. Obviously I was completely in love with the sport, but at that point, money and time was the issue. Last year, I moved from Illinois to Florida to go to school.

I met some pretty cool people down here in Daytona Beach. I became pretty close friends with about 5 of them. However, in July, two of my friends and I (Jamie and Steven) decided to go through AFF and start jumping on the weekends. We absolutely love it. Two of our other friends, though, hate that we go (Complete whuffos by the way, just so you understand the type of personality I'm talking about;). One even asked, "So, how much altitude do you gain when you deploy your canopy?"). We offered to split a tandem for them so they could see what it was like, but they just said that they weren't interested in it. So whenever Jamie, Steven and I hang out with our other two friends, we CANNOT mention anything about skydiving. If we do, you can immediately feel the tension. It's honestly ridiculous. To make the situation even worse, one of the whuffos is my roommate. So every Saturday night when I get home from the DZ, I am almost completely ignored, and sometimes this extends into Sunday. They constantly make rude remarks, claiming that it's the "same thing over and over again" and "don't understand why we waste all the money to do it". They also often have these inside jokes that they say to each other around us, that is obviously making fun of us.

I am an extremely respectful person, and I pride myself on not losing my temper when people irritate me. However, it's getting to the point where it's really starting to piss me off. I understand that skydiving isn't for everyone, and my skydiving friends and I try not to talk about it around them. But, what the hell? I never imagined that people could be so resentful towards others who just are doing something they enjoy.

My question is, any advice on how to handle this? I tried ignoring it, joking with them about things, but nothing seems to help.
I just wanted to let you know, the back of yo' head is radikulus

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"So whenever Jamie, Steven and I hang out with our other two friends, we CANNOT mention anything about skydiving."

And why would you?

My guess is that's really what they're reacting to; you probably sound to them as if you're telling them the same story over and over. Sure, from your point of view it's different, but to them, well, they've already heard it and had enough.

You can probably go your entire life and never talk to a whuffo about your skydiving exploits and in general you'll be much better off if you do.
quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

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Well, at first we did talk about it. Which, it's hard not to, especially when you're first starting. But when we started to see they were irritated by it, we stopped. We haven't mentioned anything around them for nearly a month, and it's still just constant badgering
I just wanted to let you know, the back of yo' head is radikulus

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I may be wrong, but it sounds like jealousy and resentment on their part and how they handle it is a bit...lame. [:/]

Do they have hobbies or interests that they are also passionate about? If so, is it something that you could participate in with them? If they do not maybe you could try and find something that they are interested in and do that on your non-skydive days.

Otherwise...screw 'em.:D

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Kind of a silly question if you ask me, but I honestly have had tons of trouble with this. Here's the story:

I have been interested in skydiving since I can remember. When my best friend turned 18 in 2008, we both did a tandem for the first time. Obviously I was completely in love with the sport, but at that point, money and time was the issue. Last year, I moved from Illinois to Florida to go to school.

I met some pretty cool people down here in Daytona Beach. I became pretty close friends with about 5 of them. However, in July, two of my friends and I (Jamie and Steven) decided to go through AFF and start jumping on the weekends. We absolutely love it. Two of our other friends, though, hate that we go (Complete whuffos by the way, just so you understand the type of personality I'm talking about;). One even asked, "So, how much altitude do you gain when you deploy your canopy?"). We offered to split a tandem for them so they could see what it was like, but they just said that they weren't interested in it. So whenever Jamie, Steven and I hang out with our other two friends, we CANNOT mention anything about skydiving. If we do, you can immediately feel the tension. It's honestly ridiculous. To make the situation even worse, one of the whuffos is my roommate. So every Saturday night when I get home from the DZ, I am almost completely ignored, and sometimes this extends into Sunday. They constantly make rude remarks, claiming that it's the "same thing over and over again" and "don't understand why we waste all the money to do it". They also often have these inside jokes that they say to each other around us, that is obviously making fun of us.

I am an extremely respectful person, and I pride myself on not losing my temper when people irritate me. However, it's getting to the point where it's really starting to piss me off. I understand that skydiving isn't for everyone, and my skydiving friends and I try not to talk about it around them. But, what the hell? I never imagined that people could be so resentful towards others who just are doing something they enjoy.

My question is, any advice on how to handle this? I tried ignoring it, joking with them about things, but nothing seems to help.



At least you have two friends who are cool with it. :)

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When you first start jumping, it is common to want to talk about your experiences to everyone because it it so important to you. After you tell the 300th whuffo it "Ain't a perfectly good airplane", "Yes, you have two chutes and they seldom both malfunction", and "Yes, I can jump with other people", you will just say you had a great weekend, without the play-by-play.

If you think your friends don't want to hear it, wait till your girlfriend gets fed up that you are at the DZ every weekend and not with her. Unless of course your GF is a jumper as well.B|
50 donations so far. Give it a try.

You know you want to spank it
Jump an Infinity

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I started taking AFF recently. A few acquaintances thought I was stupid, and told me so, with the smug I'm-better-than-you-because-I-have-the-sense-not-to-do-that vibe. I soon learned whom not to bring it up in front of.
I try to cool it in front of others too. Maybe mention I had another lesson but not rolling out details unless they ask questions. (Well, I do blog about it but nobody's forcing them to read that.)
As for your buddies, my guess is that your non-diving pals felt alienated that part of the "gang" was bonding over an experience that they themselves didn't have. For example, I'm a female who never had kids. When my fellow friends started having them, conversations often steered into trading experiences about pregnancy, babies, feeding, preschool, blah blah blah. They had something in common. I was the outsider. Maybe your "why do you do that!?" friends feel the same way.
Not that that excuses their attitudes, of course.
My blog with the skydiving duck cartoons.

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I always try to avoid talking about skydiving with whuffos. They always ask the same stupid questions, and really don't care much to want to get into the details of the sport.

Whats probably happening here is that they are kinda tired of you bringing up skydiving so much, and I can kinda get that.

Like someone said above, when a whuffo asks me how my weekend was, I always say something like "it was fun" or "it was great".

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I used to have friends that got mad when I skydived, but not anymore.



FallsLikeABrick, there's some sage words of future reality there.
Really a good clue on how to handle the situation.
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

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friends typically are your friends because you share mutual interests. you take away those mutual interests, you take away the friend.

they are probably jealous or upset that you aren't around all the time.

skydiving lets you know which friends you have that are worth putting the time in to see outside of skydiving. the list dwindles fast so just get used to it:|
"Never grow a wishbone, where your backbone ought to be."

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The hardest friends to lose are the ones you still like, at least these people are nice enough to remove that barrier for you.

Sorry to be adult about it but maybe you could talk to them about it, probably one at a time, and find out what the problem is and how to deal with it.

If that doesn't work, there's always the human flesh angle... :D

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friends typically are your friends because you share mutual interests. you take away those mutual interests, you take away the friend.

they are probably jealous or upset that you aren't around all the time.

skydiving lets you know which friends you have that are worth putting the time in to see outside of skydiving. the list dwindles fast so just get used to it:|



That is unfortunately so true.

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friends typically are your friends because you share mutual interests. you take away those mutual interests, you take away the friend.

:|


That's not a definition I would use for a friend, that's an acquaintance.
None of my FRIENDS are adversely affected by my skydiving.
They're my FRIENDS they WANT me to be happy and enjoy my life.
You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky)
My Life ROCKS!
How's yours doing?

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Hum....I think you are doing it a bit wrong.
1) Invite them over for a boogie...and give them BBQ duty!
2) Point out the "angry chick skydiver" there is always one...and introduce them as "Shah from DZ.com" and then stand back and watch the ensuing sexually heated arguments.
3) Teach them how to pack and say you will pay them $5 IN CASH!

OR
End every action you do with "The Skygod will be pleased."
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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i had a little bit of this from my BMX friends. i think part of it was them thinking i had just gotten tired of bmx and was off to something new and would replace them as my good friends. (i still love bmx and it gives me a rush that jumping cant and vis versa) but i found it helped a lot to include them in your big achievements, i brought my rig up to show them how to pack, i show them videos that are stunning (like wind tunnel four way freefly videos or wingsuit base videos) and before i knew it they had become interested in it. a lot of them ask me how jumping is and how many i have etc. it was a big concern for me because these are the people who i grew up with, got hurt with and were there through good and bad so they are more like a family. i just urge you to keep trying, and if they dont eventually open up to it, then maybe they arent close friends.
"its just a normal day at the dropzone until its not"

1653

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To make the situation even worse, one of the whuffos is my roommate.



Do they pay their share of the rent on time? Do they refrain from eating your food or invading your space/borrow things that aren't their without asking?

If they pay up and don't bust your stuff, then really that's all a roommate needs to be good for. Stick out the lease if you want or find someone at the DZ who also needs housing and rent a place with them.

I got a lot of surprising negativity from my old friends when I started skydiving. I didn't get why they seemed so pissed off by it, especially since I never got aggro about trying to get them to join me. There is something about seeing other people change and find happiness that is truly infuriating to some.

If you're really in for the long haul, your life is going to change. Your finances are going to change, your social life is going to change, and you're not going to be the same person as you were. That's the cool thing about this sport, in my opinion. I don't hang out with a TON of people I used to spend all my time with, and I couldn't be happier. Drunk assholes who sit on their ass and talk shit. Who needs that bs?

Keep jumping and don't worry about your old friends. Chances are in a few years they'll be right where you left them.

Edited to add: I traded in for drunk assholes who jump their asses off and talk shit the whole time. That makes a world of difference :P

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Thanks for your help guys. I know they feel like I don't spend enough time hanging out with them (sometimes I feel like they think we're married), but I only make it to the DZ on Saturdays as it is. So if they can't deal with me being gone one day a week, then they have some serious issues that can't be fixed, and thus I must go with the eating suggestion.
I just wanted to let you know, the back of yo' head is radikulus

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+1
New jumpers often go through a period where all they ever want to talk about is jumping (with jumpers and non jumpers). The "Hi, I'm Joe and I skydive!" syndrome.

Drives me a little crazy as an experienced jumper.

That, with some jealousy, and fear of losing a friend to another group can make things tricky.

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