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Chelseaflies

Are sexual relations inappropriate between a skydiver and their paying student?

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>absolutely...otherwise you are both a shitty instructor and significant other.

I disagree. In my experience, people treat their significant other differently than they treat strangers, and that carries over into many aspects of their lives. That's why sexual relationships between employees and supervisors are such a problematic issues for employers.

Some people may be able to not have the relationship affect their teaching. But again, that to me is akin to a skydiver saying he is fine teaching after having a few beers. Might some be able to handle drinking and teaching? Probably. But it's a good policy to avoid that, even if some skydivers can handle it - because it often does affect their performance.

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Freeflaw

absolutely...otherwise you are both a shitty instructor and significant other.


It's no secret that I met my wife when she was a student at the DZ. She actually got more instruction because I really, really wanted her to be okay. Even got her off the DZ gutter gear and onto better equipment early, made bunches of coach jumps with her, etc. I'd seen too many GF's rushed into stuff over their heads. I was super cautious with her.

For what it's worth, that's the other side of the coin.

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JohnMitchell

***
Once the beer light is on they are no longer a student;)

No one has brought this up but what if the student is hitting on you after hours?

Yes, it happened more than you'd think. :S

My instructor turned down my advances>:(
Have you seen my pants?
it"s a rough life, Livin' the dream
>:)

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I really, really wanted her



;)

Quote

No one has brought this up but what if the student is hitting on you after hours?



Most employers' policies that prohibit faculty and staff from engaging in romantic relationships with students make no distinction as to which party is the hitter and which is the hittee. And properly so. As I noted up-thread, such policies are not only to protect the student from being taken advantage of (or the appearance thereof), but also to guard against students receiving favoritism (or the appearance thereof).

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JohnMitchell

***Shayna Richardson.

Was that due to poor instruction due to the ongoing relationship, or was she just as bad at skydiving as that little Texas girl? Dunno.

Primarily due to poor instruction.

As I said before in another thread:
Once you've discarded all the hating from people on here, it's actually possible to see the vid and read the story of a student who was rushed in over her head. She made student mistakes and a few poor descisions, including sleeping with her instructor.

But.

The guy proceeds to put Richardson under a way too small canopy, all the while assuring her that she can handle said canopy. When his regular DZ won't let her jump the canopy, he takes her to a different one. Of course Richardson listens to him over the DZO. What the hell does she know? She only got a few jumps (under his tutelage) and he's her boyfriend!

Richardson has an accident, and it turns out, no insurance.
So she seeks the media, telling everyone that it's her own fault, but she wants her own face back, so she asks for donations.

As a result she got crucified on here, while nobody ever mentions the instructor douchebag who put her in that situation in the first place.

I can rant on and on about this, but the short of it is that Richardson merely was a student who made student mistakes. In my opinion, her instructor-boyfriend is to blame for the accident and lucky he didn't get the crap sued out of him.

I hope he can live with himself.
"That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport."
~mom

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It is NEVER appropriate for any staff member (PARTICULARLY Instructor staff) to be hitting on or hooking up with students. By students I mean tandems and any freefall student who does not possess an A license. It's a fantastic way to run off future business.

Some dropzones I've worked at take this very seriously and others don't seem to care at all.

That said: after A-license it's whatever two consenting adults feel like doing.

Chuck

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SkymonkeyONE

It is NEVER appropriate for any staff member (PARTICULARLY Instructor staff) to be hitting on or hooking up with students. By students I mean tandems and any freefall student who does not possess an A license. It's a fantastic way to run off future business.

Some dropzones I've worked at take this very seriously and others don't seem to care at all.

That said: after A-license it's whatever two consenting adults feel like doing.

Chuck



There is also one other thing to consider for the student/former student and the instructor.

When and if the relationship goes south.... who gets custody of all the friends at the dropzone.. and who becomes the pariah who will need to find a new DZ to jump at. A lot of people thrive on that kind of drama it seems.

Some people can be adult about it and move on... but human nature being what it is... that prop starts turning awful fast for a lot of people.

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Back in the day it was called "working the gold mine.";)

Sparky



Back in the 70's ~ I thought it was a requirement on the waiver!

Besides, after the jump is over....'business' is concluded ~ what happens - happens.










~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

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As a doc I would never sleep with a patient. Even my ER patients who I see for a few minutes and will never see again... never ever ever. Even when I was single. Its an issue with being in a position of power over someone else who looks up to you for support and guidance. They are scared, a student, you just kept them alive.... you have more psychological control than you know. Granted, I dated a politician once and she had some "say" over budgeting for my hospital. Talk about me feeling powerless to end it with fear something bad would happen. She was such a good person in the end (rare for a politician) and was a doll in the breakup... but despite that the POWER disparity was hard.

I think if you get to know a student... great... but as an instructor you should be professional about it and keep it clean until you are not their instructor any more. You should not treat your students preferentially... you should treat them all equal.

Is it "wrong"? No. Not really. You're all adults and unless your DZ has rules about it... go ahead.
But I will say from an "ethical" standpoint I think its at least unprofessional and some in the psychology would would say you have a power and control disparity that can't be ignored.

If you REALLY want to do it right, assign them another AFFI and hook up with them all you want. Then there is NO conflict, its classy and responsible, and makes you look pro.

just my 2 cents. At the end of the day, we're all adults, and as long as its consensual, my opinion is just my opinion... and oft is not something everyone agrees with ;)
You are not the contents of your wallet.

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That reminds me of an IAD first jump course instructor who was attracted to the beautiful brunette in his course.
As soon as it was safe, he handed her off to the freefall instructors.
The day she graduated freefall, he asked her out to dinner. They have been married for almost a decade and have two charming children.
That is the way relationships should be handled on DZs.

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It's only uncool when you are caught....

Thats why there are trailers and cabins etc on the dz...( and behind the hangars )
You have the right to your opinion, and I have the right to tell you how Fu***** stupid it is.
Davelepka - "This isn't an x-box, or a Chevy truck forum"
Whatever you do, don't listen to ChrisD.

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