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Tuna-Salad

What whuffo questions annoy you the most?

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When someone asks me, "What if your chute doesn't open?" I, of course, say there is another chute. Naturally they then ask, "Well, what if that one doesn't open?" I then say, well, I would then take my left shoe off and put it in my right back pocket. With a confused look they wonder what good that would do, and I tell them none, but it would give the FAA investigators something to think about. :P



This is just classic.

Although I think unzipping your pants and going in holding your johnson would be another.

I can see the headlines: Man dies attempting to masturbate in freefall, FAA spokesman has declared 'loss of altitude awareness' as root cause of accident.

Interviews with wife: 'well, he was a one minute wonder...'

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The one that I refuse to even dignify with a response is "you're tall." No shit



I have a few canned responses to that one:
"Thanks for noticing!"
"Very astute observation."
"Can't slip anything by you."
"You have very nice tits, and a tight ass."
"Thank you! And you have a fat ass."

In order of use.
Actually, I don't think that I've ever used the last two. Anyone here with nice tits, and a tight ass care to inform me that I'm tall?

Martin
Experience is what you get when you thought you were going to get something else.

AC DZ

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Not annoyed by these, but they do come up often:

What if both chutes don't open? Answer: you complain to the person who packed them.
How far do you go up when your canopy opens? (after seeing some tandemvids) Anwers: you don't (and then they don't believe you...)
How many people refuse to jump once they're in the plane? Anwer: well since our pilots are only trained to land EMPTY planes, not all that many ;)
How many tandemjumps do you have to make before jumping yourself? Answer: well, your TM is now doing his 2nd... :P



And a new one:
Say, those clouds (looking outside airplane window), are those REAL???

Ehm, I just photoshopped them, special :D


ciel bleu,
Saskia

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"Did you see that Nitro Circus where Travis Pastrana chugs a red bull and jumps out without a parachute?" again I may snap.



"No, I haven't" [shrug]. "I heard about it though".

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That is the most annoying question of them all, the kicker is they always ask "when are you going to try that"...


[indifferent shrug] "I jump out of airplanes... that's Cool enough for me".

Works well enough - it usually gets huge eyes and a few nods from the people questioning me - and more importantly, silence.:)
"That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport."
~mom

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The questions don't annoy me too much, but I've had more than one person tell me they'd BASE jump but not skydive "It's safer because it's much closer to the ground." That's probably what annoys me the most.

One guy even said the only place he'd jump is at bridge day. "It's over water so even if your parachute fails you'll still survive."

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The questions don't annoy me too much, but I've had more than one person tell me they'd BASE jump but not skydive "It's safer because it's much closer to the ground." That's probably what annoys me the most.



I had that one few times: "Oh you skydive [with a somewhat detached tone] - How high is it when you exit?"
- About 12000 ft
- Wow [with a somewhat amazed tone]

I guess I should lie and decrease the altitude until the detached tone stays the same.

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10 seconds after I land, and I'm still wearing my rig: "Do you jump too?"

The number of people that don't think that girls can jump too is astounding.



+1.

Very astounding! My grandad says to me "when are you going to stop jumping out of planes? You've done it once, you don't need to keep doing it" - and he's an ex-para!
UK skydiver moving to British Columbia in early 2011 - any recommendations?

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I will once i get enough jump nubmers in. and i go for specialized training for base and wing. Im hoping to be very profecient in both before i combine them
"In this game you can't predict the future. You just have to play the odds. "-JohnMitchell

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Ha I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm 6'7" and I am a server and college student. People love to comment on my height. And they always seem so pround like it was an original comment. "Do you play basketball?" "No." "Well you should." Does this imply that I should play professionally? I didn't realize it was that simple.. or maybe they just think I should play in my freetime. Whatever, it's funny to me. The one that I refuse to even dignify with a response is "you're tall." No shit




Here's a response for you:
"No I don't play basketball, do you play miniature golf?"

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I gave up trying to answer these questions... and the ever present.. "I wouldn't do that unless the plane was crashing"

The perfectly good airplanes has to be my pet peeve..




The one that kills me is: If I have sex with you will you take me skydiving, come on, im not just some piece of meat here.:ph34r::D



You get that 2? It really pisses me off! :D:D
Life is all about ass....either you're kicking it, kissing it, working it off, or trying to get a piece of it.
Muff Brother #4382 Dudeist Skydiver #000
www.fundraiseadventure.com

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I managed to fall off my bicycle over the weekend and road rashed the palm of my hand. One of the guys at work took one look at my bandaged hand and asked me, "What happened, did you have trouble pulling the ripcord?" :S:S:D


Enemiga Rodriguez, PMS #369, OrFun #25, Team Dirty Sanchez #116, Pelt Head #29, Muff #4091

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"If you don't wear goggles, will your eyes get ripped out?"

"Can you land on your house if you want?"

These aren't annoying, more funny & kinda genuine questions if you don't know the answer. I was asked both of these on Sunday by a random person.

I remember a student on my AFF course being convinced that you could drown if you fell through a cloud.
UK skydiver moving to British Columbia in early 2011 - any recommendations?

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Unles the person keeps asking the same type of questions over and over I usually try to chat with them a little about skydiving. After all we are a pretty small percetage of the population. Running into one of us may not be a daily thing for everyone.

The one that really got me pissed was a few years ago I was working in a warehouse and when I bought my new rig I had it shipped to my work since we had daily UPS shipping and I was never home during delivery hours. My coworkers all wanted to see it and asked me to put it on. Once I had it on the demanded that I climb up on the roof and jump off to show them how it works. The roof was maybe 30 feet high. They kept asking why it takes 800 feet for it to open? Isnt that dangerous? Dont you want something that works faster? I wouldnt jump anyting that is that slow...

I guess some people will never understand...

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I personally love it when people ask What's it like?
I've only had 7 successful jumps but telling people how free it feels and how natural....well it's a good talking point.
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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