turtlespeed 212 #1 June 11, 2012 01/03/12: MISTAKEN PATERNITY The 82nd Texas Legislature amended the Texas Family Code to allow courts to terminate the parent-child relationship and the duty to pay child support in circumstances of mistaken paternity. Men who meet the requirements of the law may seek court-ordered genetic testing. If testing excludes a man as the child’s biological father, the court may terminate the parent-child relationship and the duty to pay future child support. Read our frequently asked questions to learn more about the new law. Too bad all the support that was given can't be reclaimed.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #2 June 11, 2012 Clint, maybe you're after late term abortion? Really late. Like the 10th trimester... --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #3 June 12, 2012 Quote Clint, maybe you're after late term abortion? Really late. Like the 10th trimester... no. I'm after justice. Do you have any idea how many men pay for kids that aren't theirs?I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #4 June 12, 2012 There are cases where paternity wasn't proven until after thousands were paid. Is that fair or just? Seriously?I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #5 June 12, 2012 Quote Quote Clint, maybe you're after late term abortion? Really late. Like the 10th trimester... no. I'm after justice. Do you have any idea how many men pay for kids that aren't theirs? No idea, it isn't something I've had to deal with or even a subject that I've had to become proficient in (thankfully).--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tkhayes 124 #6 June 12, 2012 I always thought that abortion could be retroactive in some cases..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
marks2065 0 #7 June 12, 2012 Quote Clint, maybe you're after late term abortion? Really late. Like the 10th trimester... Usually when a male is ordered to pay child support the order is rarely removed even when paternity is proven. the courts have and do make thousands of men pay for kids that are not theirs. one of our recent veterns has been in this position costin him thousands of dollars and his quality of life. the courts see it as you have been the father so just continue. this might be because of a case from (I think) texas that a man was found to not be the father of 2 or 3 of his kids and got divorced and was ordered to pay child support even though the true father was known because he raised them to tenage years thinking they were his. Never start paying child support until the paternity has been settled, even in cases that you are pretty sure that it may be your child. and order a paternity test immediatly. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
davjohns 1 #8 June 12, 2012 I'm going to chime in. I got married because I thought I got her pregnant. I never considered the possibility that it wouldn't be mine. I don't cheat and it never crossed my mind that she would. Fast forward 20 years. She has cheated the entire time. We are divorced. She tells 'our' son that his real father was a bartender and offers to introduce them. I REALLY want to be able to sue for fraud and get some money back. I can never get back all the years I donated. I still consider the boy my son, but the acts of his mother deserve some form of redress. I have no problem with testing every child at the time of birth. It would keep lots of people straight or set them straight.I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
marks2065 0 #9 June 12, 2012 QuoteI'm going to chime in. I got married because I thought I got her pregnant. I never considered the possibility that it wouldn't be mine. I don't cheat and it never crossed my mind that she would. Fast forward 20 years. She has cheated the entire time. We are divorced. She tells 'our' son that his real father was a bartender and offers to introduce them. I REALLY want to be able to sue for fraud and get some money back. I can never get back all the years I donated. I still consider the boy my son, but the acts of his mother deserve some form of redress. I have no problem with testing every child at the time of birth. It would keep lots of people straight or set them straight. Sorry to hear this, I can't imagine the emotional torment you have been through. at this point all you can do is build a good relationship with your son and educate him to avoid this situation. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaDon 340 #10 June 12, 2012 Sorry to hear your marriage turned out so badly. Do you actually know if you are or are not the genetic father? I assume the son is around 20, so he and you could consent to a paternity test. If the relationship with your ex is that bad, she could be talking shit to get at you, or to try to separate you and your son. One thing I always wonder about in these cases, is donating a sperm that only thing that makes someone a father? What kind of person would cut off ties to a child who he has raised, and who regards and loves him as their father, even if they do find out the sperm donor was someone else. I'm not saying you have or would do that, as you say you still regard the boy as your son, but that is definitely an undercurrent to the whole paternity issue. It sounds as if you have a lot of anger and bitterness about the situation, and that's understandable. But consider, that is allowing your ex to continue to exert a lot of control (all negative) over your life. Fuck that. Do you love the person you raised as your son? If so, savor that and don't let anyone else dictate the quality of your relationship. Do you really want to spend possibly years in court, confronting your ex and in the process compounding your bitterness, just to punish her by extracting a few dollars? Will that really help you to be happy? Maybe you're in a bad situation, if your profession surrounds you with broken families that serve to remind you of your own tribulations. I've seen family break-ups that become so pathological that by the end everything the couple has worked for all their lives is taken by the lawyers, the kids are scarred for life by being caught in the middle, and the parents end up so bitter they can be eating filet mingion and all they can taste is dog shit. Do you really want to spend the rest of your career reliving that over and over and over, even if it is a "good living" financially? Take care of yourself. Life is short. You deserve to be happy. Don_____________________________________ Tolerance is the cost we must pay for our adventure in liberty. (Dworkin, 1996) “Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.” (Yeats) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern_Man 0 #11 June 12, 2012 Quote One thing I always wonder about in these cases, is donating a sperm that only thing that makes someone a father? What kind of person would cut off ties to a child who he has raised, and who regards and loves him as their father, even if they do find out the sperm donor was someone else. I'm not saying you have or would do that, as you say you still regard the boy as your son, but that is definitely an undercurrent to the whole paternity issue. Not disagreeing with the overall tone of your post but I do not believe a man should be forced to pay child support for a child who is not biologically his own. I believe this should be true even if he was married to the mother and has functioned as the father through any age. The mother has committed fraud in such a situation."What if there were no hypothetical questions?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
davjohns 1 #12 June 12, 2012 Once my wife's serial infidelity came to light, it was clear to my son and I that he looks absolutely nothing like me, and his mother's family genetics do not explain it. We decided we did not want to test. We're pretty sure we already know. It changes nothing. He is my son.I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
normiss 620 #13 June 12, 2012 Awesome of you both to find the right place in the mess she created. Impressive. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #14 June 12, 2012 QuoteI always thought that abortion should be retroactive in some cases..... Fixed it for ya.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rehmwa 2 #15 June 12, 2012 QuoteQuoteI always thought that abortion should be retroactive in some cases..... Fixed it for ya. I'm not sure how the term 'abortion' even has a 'retroactive' state to the term. If you abort a viable life mass in the 417th month, it's still an abortion, not a "retroactive abortion" ... Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
davjohns 1 #16 June 12, 2012 I think you are saying the same thing. Your semantics are correct. He got the point across. Couldn't it be a 'late term abortion'? Maybe a 'really late term abortion'?I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GeorgiaDon 340 #17 June 12, 2012 QuoteIt changes nothing. He is my son. Good on you. Respect! Don_____________________________________ Tolerance is the cost we must pay for our adventure in liberty. (Dworkin, 1996) “Education is not filling a bucket, but lighting a fire.” (Yeats) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
