skreamer 1 #1 May 6, 2001 Must post more...Must post more...Must get a life...Must see daylight...waaaaahahahahahahaBoy have I spammed the hell out of you guys!!! At least Moose is stuck on an oil-rig, so apart from browse for porn this is all the fun he can have (BOTH hands above the desk please Alan).OK, and just to prove I am as shit-hot a skydiver as I am a forum spammer, here is my weekend report :Went up for my first 3-way. It was a WARP coach dive with two instructors. Deal was we make two jumps and I only pay one of their slots on each jump, unless I screw up. Guess what?We exit perfectly, get stable, into star, we turn the first point (side-in on my right), I turn back to dock for the 2nd point, before going in to take my grip - I check my altitude, BIG MISTAKE! Next thing I have lost them. The next 40 seconds were probably the most frustrating of my life (OK, apart from that time in the caravan park when her parents were in the next tent, hee hee).Anyway, I spent the rest of the skydive looking at a rock solid two way and two frustrated coaches. I went below them, I floated on them, I flew around them, just could not get back to them! A solo jumper who followed us out and lurked (from a distance) said it looked like a 2-way with camera! yayGot back to the ground and I was miserable. I was feeling really really down and beating myself up for screwing up a jump (that cost me £42). I know the money shouldn't be that important, but right now paying for those 3 slots was a considerable investment. Anyway, I found a quiet corner, sulked for a while, then went back for my debrief. The debrief was more a case of the coaches trying to cheer me up than anything else - and they did say the exit was good. But then I went and made a solo fun jump, later went to pick Ben up at the airport and we all got smashed friday night and I laughed my head off at Joey trying to play the didgeridoo - so I decided life wasn't so bad after all!Sorry for the long post, but what the hell did you expect from an addict???/sPS Sangiro does this mean you are my dealer? If so, I thought dealers always give the first one free - where's mine? (and I don't mean a free post either!!!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wingnut 0 #2 May 6, 2001 skreamer,don't sweat the jump! remember a bad day skydiving is better than a good day at work!!!!!!....man your an adict now!!!!!! i think ya need help, some "rehab" maybe??? i saw you tried to get help for your addiction this weekend, but it's not helping!!! ya need more "medicine"!!!! so i excpect ya to be cured in about 20 days!!!!! don't wory though, your "support group" here will never leave ya! we'll just help you relize your addiction is alright and normal and there is only one cure!!!........"if dreams are like movies, then memories are like films about ghosts"-counting crows Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #3 May 6, 2001 Hi WingiThe rest of my weekend was pretty good. Made another two solo jumps the next day (Saturday) - Ben heard about my attempted 3-way and said he wasn't willing to risk his life doing a 2-way with me - so it was just me and my imaginary friends doing RW (but you should have seen how many points we turned!).Wingi we have another entrant for the boogie - Alistair Hodgson. He went to Florida with Ben over new year's - he is a total piss-head too. Are you still willing to make some T-shirts for us? I don't care if they don't look *professional* - that'll just make 'em cooler.Oh yes, my other bit of news from the weekend - Thursday evening was out drinking with the DZ staff. Driving back to the DZ from the pub, one of the instructors decides to climb out my sunroof and sprawl over my windscreen, giving us the finger etc. I immediately took my foot off the petrol (was tempted to pull the hand-brake but didn't) and turned on the windscreen wipers and started spraying him with the soapy water. All great fun until I checked my windscreen the next morning and it is cracked - so that'll have to be replaced in November. More ££££ (and not even skydiving related!)/sPS I explained the hawaii shirt rule to Al and he loves it! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wingnut 0 #4 May 6, 2001 the more the merrier!!! does he need a ride from the airport too??? remember i only have 3 other seats in my car cuz the gear isn't going in the trunk. (who know's what kind of rig destroying stuff's been in there) but if ben drives his cycle then we should be fine. what name does he want on his shirt????......a two way of death????lol...ya can't be that bad can ya?...maybe ben is just scared he'll be shown up and he'll be the one to mess up......or maybe he really did fear for his life....lol......"if dreams are like movies, then memories are like films about ghosts"-counting crows Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riggerrob 558 #5 May 6, 2001 To avoid further embarrassment - how does one play the digeredoo? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #6 May 6, 2001 Well, Rob, the best way to learn to play the didgeridoo is by observing somebody play it. Now it is also a known fact that women are the best didgeridoo players in the world. So simply get your girlfriend to blow your didgeridoo for you and then observe closely (you might want to make sure she isn't practicing on somebody else's didgeridoo!!!).Although I would like to blow my own trumpet here, I must confess that I have no desire to learn to play the didgeridoo, but I have watched lots of training videos and read many manuals showing some of the world's top didgeridoo action.Hope this was of some help to you!/sPS when a certain individual strained a little too hard on Friday evening (blowing the non-custard-chucking didgeridoo of course) and his false teeth came flying out, I nearly got ahernia I was laughing so much!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iflyme 0 #7 May 6, 2001 Quotehow does one play the digeredoo?Perhaps at this point, Skreamer, it should be pointed out that the digeridoo is an Australian Aboriginal musical instrument, not a skin flute! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #8 May 6, 2001 Actually Frank, I just looked it up, and you are right it is an Australian expression, however its original meaning was to *didger* a slow sheep up the *doo-doo*, which then became abbreviated to the didgeridoo. How that then evolved into wrapping your lips around a big piece of wood and blowing till you heard some noise is a mystery to me... However you must remember that when the convicts first settled Australia the men outnumbered the women 6 to 1 (forget wing-loading, that would be a pretty shit hump-loading!) and were forced to take matters in hand.Actually that should be a skydiving expression : hump-loading. Hump-loading : the ratio of your humps to skydives on the weekend. A very heavily loaded hump ratio would be getting laid like 6 times and only making 2 skydives (3:1). Obviously you would have to have made at least one of each to be able to calculate your loading... And of course the size of your main is important too. Hmmmm, I think I need to go to the supermarket and start stocking up on strawberries and ice-cream...hee hee, I write the biggest load of crap when I'm hungover and need sleep/s Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zennie 0 #9 May 6, 2001 Well I'm hump loaded 1:1 for this weekend. ------------Blue Skies!Zennie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zennie 0 #10 May 6, 2001 Hey skreamer, like you I had been doing a fair number of solo jumps. What I've found is that if you really want to do RW, this may not be a great idea. Sure it means you may have to endure some frustration as you learn, but the problem with solos is that you have no frame of reference. I have a bit of a tendency to backslide (video shows my legs are fine, but my arms are out a little much). Plus you can't work on relative fall rates.So lately I've be scaring up anybody else I can find to jump with me. It doesn't have to be anything special. Hell you can play patty-cakes. But if you fall with someone else, you'll work through some bad habits. I personally like doing two-ways undocked and practicing chasing. Then we hook up and just alternate side-by-sides to about 4500.------------Blue Skies!Zennie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #11 May 6, 2001 Too late Zennie!I found myself a GREAT CRW coach and I am making my first CReW jump this Friday. He has well over 1 000 CRW jumps and is just an all-round top bloke. He is one of my DZ's instructors. And guess what? He won't let me pay for his slot either! And he is giving me all the briefings and coaching as well. Hmmm, now let's see, how many belly-fliers with over 1 000 RW jumps would take a newbie up for 2-way coaching and insist on paying their own slots?All I need is my IC1 Plus and then I can get signed off to start learning sit-flying. So even if get scared off of CRW after my first couple of attempts, I don't think I will be doing too much RW anyway./s Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
huffermoose 0 #12 May 7, 2001 wotcher screamer is alister the lad who used to be in the paras (blue rinsed his hair not to long ago????) i went on the piss with him when i was at langar top bloke!!!!!am really getting wound up and ready to rock roll and get seriously shithoared, looks like on the monday after the texel weekend i am going to jump on a train from amsterdam to girona (empuria ) stay there for just under a week and then am training it back to the u.k. and no i am not a train spotter but it should be a good piss up on the way there and back. fuc*kin rock on pop pickers har haronly 6 days to go till i get off this heap o shit called an oil platform back to the world of beer, fanny and outrageous ariel action wooooooohoooooooooooolets kick tyhe tyres and light the firesmoooooooooooooooooooooose Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #13 May 7, 2001 Yes, he peroxided his hair for the boogie. When I mentioned moooooooose to him he knew who you were. Do you know where we can buy hawaii shirts ? The louder the better. Also I want to wear mine over my jumpsuit so will be making some mods to the shirt to make it safe, ie where can i get CHEAP hawaii shirts?/sPS I just thought up another cool beer rule : if you sound at all like John Wayne when you talk then you have to drink!!! hee hee Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tee 0 #14 May 7, 2001 Hey Skreamer. Just remember, no jump is a bad jump as long as you learned something from it. Tee Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
huffermoose 0 #15 May 7, 2001 John Wayne ?"Well pilgrim"cool that would be good if alistar comes along, as for hawaii shirts i might be able to get you 2nd hand hawaii shirts, they will probably give you crabs (mind you you have probably got them already). but if you want me to try and sort something out for you (5 - 8 quid a shirt at a guess) i might only be able to get you one for you we will shall see!and who says i sound like john wayne??? i know i have a jaw that would make desperate dan jeolous, and i look like i have had a really hard paper round but hey john wayne ??? i aint that bad hahahahahatake it easy moooooooooooooose Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #16 May 7, 2001 Trivia question:In what movie did John Wayne's character refer to other people as "pilgrim"??Speed RacerBrew Skies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freefallfreak 0 #17 May 7, 2001 Moooooooose,Quote but hey John Wayne??? I ain't that bad hahahahaha Mess with my hero, Moooose, and I'm gonna' go mooooose hunting...FFF Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skreamer 1 #18 May 7, 2001 Is that yeeeeeeeew John Waaaaaaaaaaaayne?Hmmm, a mooooooooose-head stuck to the grille of the Bear?I think that would look awesome!/sPS mooooose, wingi is from Texas... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wingnut 0 #19 May 7, 2001 skreamer,nope i just lived there for 8 months....i'm origanally from ohio......way way east!!!!!!!!!"if dreams are like movies, then memories are like films about ghosts"-counting crows Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #20 May 7, 2001 Hey Skreamer, I finally noticed you have achieved the status of "addict" And I thought "old hand" was as high as you could go! LOL!As a matter of fact, I believe you are the first "addict" on all of Dropzone.com!!! BEER!!!!Speed RacerBrew Skies Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
huffermoose 0 #21 May 7, 2001 addict !!! that is kinda sad get out and jump more man, i would if i could!!! argggggggggggggghhhhhhi have been in west africa now for just over three weeks on nightshift and i am pasty as a really pasty person on brighton beach on a very pasty day.get my drift????actually if i stand quite close to the flare (40 foot flaming thing which burns of residual gas) it sounds like the wind rushing past your ears at 120mph (you can only do it for a short time or your ears will be goosed)sigh week tommorow i'll be up up and a away again woooohoooooooooo.and john waynes your hero???then answer me this! why did he walk around like he's been goosed up the sh*tbox several times a day???moooooooooooooooooose(put another deer on the bonnet hal !) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
weid14 0 #22 May 7, 2001 Believe it or not patty-cakes is a pretty good two way drill dive. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PalmettoTiger 1 #23 May 8, 2001 QuoteIs that yeeeeeeeew John Waaaaaaaaaaaayne?HAHAHAHAhohohoheeeheeheeheeehichahahohoho... flashbacks to last semester when I watched Full Metal Jacket 4 or 5 times. The parts set on Parris Island always crack me up. That drill instructor was so f@cking funny!! Even more so because my dad was in the USMC, and I know 3 guys who are at VMI or the Citadel and it always reminds me of them. The second half of the movie, though... that's just incredibly scary. I couldn't imagine myself in that setting, and at 21 I'm older than lots of those guys were...Blues, squares,PTiger Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iflyme 0 #24 May 8, 2001 Quote Hmmm, now let's see, how many belly-fliers with over 1 000 RW jumps would take a newbie up for 2-way coaching and insist on paying their own slots?That the way it is with everyone at my DZ. Nobody ever pays for a coached jump! Thanks goodness for small DZs! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma 0 #25 May 8, 2001 Hello Skreamer, Don't feel bad about the crappy 3-way.....In the whole scheme of how much money you're going to spend on skydiving over the course of your life, this will seem like a pittance - God, how scary!.....I have lost count of the number of jumps I've spent skating around solid 2 and 3-ways like a demented lunatic...Very frustrating..You can SEE where you want to be and just CAN'T ARSING WELL GET THERE!!!...However, it does sort of 'click' if you stick at it.I've just spent my weekend funnelling...oooh, at least 8 4way exits...In fact, they all funneled as I think of it...BUT! It wasn't so long ago that I couldn't even get a 2-way out the door without disaster striking! So i know we'll crack this eventually too...Incidentally, like the sound of your free CrW coaching, although the idea of CrW scares the shit out of me so I wouldn't be up for it myself ..(First time I heard the phrase CANOPY relative work I assumed it was a joke...honestly)...I jump at Hinton, and we often get guys with over 1000 jumps offering to give us some free RW coaching (Warp or flying camera for us) - and they pay their own slots...Even the DZOs....Although it has been pointed out by some (rather cynically I feel) that having breasts might be an advantage....Anyways....the sun is shining here in London...must get some work done and then contrive a reason to be out of the office ('working from home' is a good one heh he) for the rest of this sunny week!e Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
