BoobieCootie 0 #51 May 29, 2003 Quote I have never farted in a plane nor do I intend to. It's a good thing video can't record smell.So next time anyone asks me why I jump out of planes, I'll tell them that someone ripped a bad one Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Swoopyswoop 0 #52 May 29, 2003 Hey no shame in my game, I just let her rip. Screw trying to be polite. If you dont like my ass burp, then dont breathe. Scotty "when I die, I want to go like my grandfather while im sleeping, not like the passengers riding in the car with me Swoopster A.S.S. #6 Future T.S.S holder Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydivexxl 0 #53 May 29, 2003 Steve Martin... "Mind if I smoke?" "No, Mind if I fart?????" Blog Clicky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MikeMcLean 0 #54 May 29, 2003 I let fly with the silent but deadlies. I've only been "caught" a few times, but man I have caused a number of others to get blamed.It wouldn't hurt you to think like a fucking serial killer every once in a while - just for the sake of prevention Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MuffDiver 0 #55 May 29, 2003 Best thread ever. I'm sitting here wiping tears from my eyes. I'm at a cesna DZ so the flight is always intimate. I try to hold them if there are people on the load that I don't really know or if there are girls on the load, but if its a loud load of guys you gotta have a war. __________________________________________________ Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out alive. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #56 May 29, 2003 Shit yeah dude! That's why I fart away, being at at 182 DZ! Pffffrrrrrrt. Then a window or the dooor comes open. --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydyvr 0 #57 May 29, 2003 Just a reminder folks! When you smell someone else's farts, it is because their actual poo-poo molecules have entered your body through the sinuses, triggering the receptors just like any other scent. There is little doubt that at least a handful of those molecules are absorbed into your bloodstream through your lungs too! . . =(_8^(1) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Unutsch 0 #58 May 29, 2003 i follow the saying: health first, manners second... and fart it all out.... especially on a load full of older skydivers who made my first jumps a real struggle for air Check out the site of the Fallen Angels FreeflY Organisation: http://www.padliangeli.org Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Squeak 17 #59 May 29, 2003 Quote I think Squeak is a Master of this........is the story true about an entire load exiting at like 3500?? Slightly exagerated, but it was worth a medal. The door of the Navajo was opened 10,000 feet earlier than normal on a cold day just to flush the plane. People were dry wretching, I was laughing my illy head off. After we landed I was congratulated by a fewTo all the women who ar requesting no farting are you telling me YOU DONT when you need too.You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky) My Life ROCKS! How's yours doing? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malev 0 #60 May 29, 2003 Quote pinch it in, please. It's so foul. Let it go when no one else is around Exactly, please let it rip before you get onto the plane. I've never been in to farting around other people, and I really don't understand why others do as it is very unpleasant. I've only been on a few loads so far, and every one has been poisoned. At least theres a window in the plane when it gets really bad. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bluepill 0 #61 May 29, 2003 Quote what are you talking about? women don't fart Yeh right. I once got on a load with just me and 12 ladies. I couldent believe my luck, or so I thought. Me being the only man, there was no way I was going to parp on that load. But afterr climbing only a few k's the fun began. Wafts of the most foulest stinking stench came flooding through the plan... and it wasent me, yet all eyes immediatly went to me. Then all the girls started blasting away (actually quiet ones - the worst). I think they must have thought 'how dare he fart on our load' and decided to get there own back.Anyhow, buy the time It was time to get out, I was concerned my helmet would fall off cos I swear my head had shrunk a few sizes.and I maintain, I did not fart on that load.....I never, honest. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #62 May 29, 2003 All I know is that I drank a lot last night, so today in the jump plane is going to be "interesting." --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steel 0 #63 May 29, 2003 Although farting in the plane may not be a nice gesture to your fellow skydivers, the unpleasant scent will be gone in less than a minute. On the other hand as I recall jumping in in Italy out of a porter with 8 Italians the unpleasant smell was from the point the door was closed up until it was open and I could stick my head out the window for relief.If I could make a wish, I think I'd pass. Can't think of anything I need No cigarettes, no sleep, no light, no sound. Nothing to eat, no books to read. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeffGordon 0 #64 May 29, 2003 Oh right. Like girls never fart. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyskydiver 0 #65 May 29, 2003 Sorry, hon. I'm not the one that said girls never fart. I just said - keep it outside the plane. Yesh! Some of the people on the plane have let ones rip that you expect their pants to be fully loaded when they stand up. YUK!!!Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly! Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that made you smile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cgross 1 #66 May 29, 2003 This is not a LIE, I have never farted in the plane. I do what is called a PJD Pre Jump Dump. I always have to shit before a jump, also gets rid of the gas. But here is what sux. I am new, so i am always in the front of the otter away from the door. You bastards rip them off, open the door, and it pushes the smell to the front. Cut the shit (no pun intended) Man, you guys should be happy I am not a monkey, otherwise I might throw poo at you Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katzeye 0 #67 May 29, 2003 Living in San Diego we get some awsome mexican food, and tequila. I ripped one that made MY eyes water AND claimed it! Crack that door! hehLet's remember the basics: As we climb in altitude, the pressure causes the gases in our bodies to expel. Some burp, others fart. It can't be helped. If the ladies out there (and I'm one) do not understand this, and their sensitivies are damaged, I suggest putting your face in your helmet during such occurences. It's a natural bodily function - get over it. LA* Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Katzeye 0 #68 May 29, 2003 Quote Some of the people on the plane have let ones rip that you expect their pants to be fully loaded when they stand up. Are farts supposed to be heavy? heheh Is a chicken omelette redundant? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #69 May 29, 2003 Quote what are you talking about? women don't fart ...And they wonder why they get cramps every 28 days! Speed Racer -------------------------------------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lizzieb 0 #70 May 29, 2003 now that was funny... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #71 May 29, 2003 - get over it. Ummm...I have mostly male friends and 2 brothers. I myself dislike those girls that claim to be sooo pristine; they need to BE REAL. All the girls that spoke up here have been pretty cool about things. It's not that our "sensitivities are damaged". (That is not true.) You see, we don't care if the men or "ladies" accidentally let one or two rip every so often. However, if you are firing away like a machine gun for "shits & giggles" (no pun intended), making people gulp down their own puke in hopes of not throwing up all over the plane and everyone's gear...something's wrong. It's true that everyone is biologically different, but COME ON!!! (rant) If you are making divers puke and pilots pass out - Learn to use the FUCKING bathroom (PJD) ...or, better yet, go to your doctor because something may be wrong! (Proper British professor voice) For gassy ones - "The more sulfur-rich your diet, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be produced by the bacteria in your guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods such as cauliflower, eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts, whereas beans produce large amounts of not particularly stinky farts." By the way, I have accepted that it will never smell like vanilla on the plane, but I still love ya all...so very much! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Malev 0 #72 May 29, 2003 Quote It's true that everyone is biologically different, but COME ON!!! Spot on! I can exect to a small extent that pressure changes can cause people's bodies to expel gases (but seriously - if you expel some of said gas before you get on the plane there will be a lot less to come out), but it is quite obvious from this thread and general conversation on the DZ that there are a lot of people out there who find it funny to "let one off" purely to see how much they can discomfort everyone else. I don't fart in your face, why the fuck should I have to put up with you doing it to me? I'm new to the sport, and this is one aspect of it that I find deeply unpleasant and it really does spoil the ride to altitude for me. Theres no need for it, and most people don't actually find it as funny as you probably think they do. Sorry to rant, its just something that gets right up my nose (ahem). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #73 May 29, 2003 Those are little pieces of pooh pooh in your nose! If you find a DZ where they have some kind of policy regarding flatulants let the other anti-fart jumpers know, maybe you can have a fart-free boogie there!...FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fundgh 0 #74 May 29, 2003 ... This could lead to Fart-free big ways, fart-free record attempts, and fart-free-free-flying-four-ways-for-females with firefly freefly suits! ...FUN FOR ALL! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ronnie 0 #75 May 30, 2003 I am now going to fart as much as humanly possible on the ride to altitude. If you know me, you know what you are in for! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
