agent_lead 0 #1 September 16, 2006 the way my life has been going the past 2 years sometimes i think to myself id rather be dead then struggling to survive for the rest of my life... some days everything is fine and im a happy camper and other days i dont want to continue today happens to be the latter its funny when your young..your in such a rush to get old..when you start getting old..you wish you could be young again...you realize how fast time flies when you take a look back at life...your 20..you look how fast your childhood went..double that..your 40 raising your own kids..60 watching your grandkids..and dependin on life...life comes to an end...some sooner then others...but time waits for noone sometimes i feel like ive taken so many losses i dont even wanna go on..between financial debts..between women..deaths..how many people can say that theve lost someone they love every year for 7 years straight from all diff causes?best friends..family..broken hearts...every woman ive ever loved is gone... i feel like noone could ever understand what i go thru..and what i feel they say time heals all wounds...they gonna need a big ass band-aid for my scars... just felt like saying all of that...please excuse my depressed rant..its funny how i was feeling all of this and a good frined of mine called me today to tell me she wanted to talk to me about life and death... eerie how things work out...or dont... i will ride alone..and die alone..but time will be my witness.. sometimes i wish i could start all over again..and know everything i know now...imagine that... life is all about time... its about time...-------------------------------------------- www.facebook.com/agentlead Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
agent_lead 0 #2 September 16, 2006 and then you look back at what you just wrote and wonder wtf you were thinking... i dont wanna die or kill myself i just want to find a easier way sometimes life gets the best of you...-------------------------------------------- www.facebook.com/agentlead Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aprilcat 0 #3 September 17, 2006 Your life is your job and just 'do' it. Please hang in there and see where it leads you. I wish I had something more profound to say, but I will say this....if you have 18 bad hours and six good ones, be thankful for the six. If you can find joy is playing with your dog, play with your dog. If you need to paint the kitchen, paint it. Don't give up. We all have our miserable periods but you have to find the joy in the unmiserable moments. Take care....April Camelot II, the Electric Boogaloo! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Snowwhite 0 #4 September 17, 2006 During the worst down period I ever had, a blind woman called me. She was going deaf, was raising three kids alone, because her husband was in jail for molesting some kids in the neighborhood, and her kids. She needed about 6 bucks worth of help. I'm listening to her and wondering what the F&*( was I so down about just a couple of minutes ago? I went to the grocery store and spent a hundred bucks on her and her family. I felt better, they felt better and her six dollar problem was (temporarily) solved. Look for someone with a bigger problem than you have ( and you won't have to look far) and solve it for them. You will feel great, they will feel great and the world will be a better place BECAUSE YOU ARE IN IT! We all know this about you, you are the only one who doubts it. Just go prove it to yourself!skydiveTaylorville.org [email protected] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #5 September 17, 2006 Yeah, listen to April. She's got feet for hands and she still keeps a positive attitude. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rocketdog 0 #6 September 17, 2006 all you can do is the best with what you're given. of course life is unpredictable, but how would you ever grow if you were NEVER tested? i'm sorry for your pain though. it helps me to look on the bright side & realize that things could ALWAYS be worse.... undoubtedly all of your trials will make you a stronger, more appreciative person. don't know what else to say to comfort you, but here's a different perspective. the first time i read this quote it became my epiphany: For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - real life. But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see that there is no way to happiness. So, treasure every moment that you have...and remember that time waits for no one. Happiness is a journey, not a destination" ~Alfred Souza see the world! http://gorocketdog.blogspot.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #7 September 17, 2006 Life is one LONG series of kicks in the nuts. You must MAKE the good times yourself to offset the crap. Now stop whining like a bitch. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #8 September 17, 2006 QuoteNow stop whining like a bitch. That's right, because that is Clay's job. How do you think he got 31,000+ posts here. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #9 September 17, 2006 QuoteHow do you think he got 31,000+ posts here. Yeah and I don't need any competition! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #10 September 17, 2006 QuoteHow do you think he got 31,000+ posts here. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Yeah and I don't need any competition! You don't have to worry, AggieDave is a newlywed. He's spending all his time fucking and stuff. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aprilcat 0 #11 September 17, 2006 QuoteYeah, listen to April. She's got feet for hands and she still keeps a positive attitude. Chris NOT!! There are neither my avatar and until you meet me, don't believe the 'hype'. ...But I am right Camelot II, the Electric Boogaloo! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #12 September 17, 2006 QuoteNOT!! There are neither my avatar and until you meet me, don't believe the 'hype'. Umm...This is not a complete sentence. Would you please repeat yourself? Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #13 September 17, 2006 QuoteAggieDave is a newlywed. He's spending all his time fucking and stuff. What's this "and stuff?" Like cutting the grass, fixing the siding, painting the house........I'm sure the list goes on. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #14 September 17, 2006 QuoteAggieDave is a newlywed. He's spending all his time fucking and stuff. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- What's this "and stuff?" Like cutting the grass, fixing the siding, painting the house........I'm sure the list goes on. Yup. The 'stuff' part is the reason I never got married. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aprilcat 0 #15 September 17, 2006 QuoteQuoteNOT!! There are neither my avatar and until you meet me, don't believe the 'hype'. Umm...This is not a complete sentence. Would you please repeat yourself? Chris Okay... Neither are in my avatar and do not believe the hype. (complete sentence) I don't see YOUR feet in your avatar! So, there!~~April Camelot II, the Electric Boogaloo! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #16 September 17, 2006 Yup. The 'stuff' part is the reason I never got married.. Well, don't write if off yet. You're still just a baby! Not all women come up with "honey do" lists for their men. Or sometimes the list is short: Honey, do me!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #17 September 17, 2006 QuoteNOT!! There are neither my avatar and until you meet me, don't believe the 'hype'. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Umm...This is not a complete sentence. Would you please repeat yourself? Chris -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Okay... Neither are in my avatar and do not believe the hype. (complete sentence) I don't see YOUR feet in your avatar! So, there!~~April I don't have any feet. I lost them in a tractor accident. That's why I was hoping you had feet for hands. I thought we could do a transplant. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #18 September 17, 2006 you're shameless!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aprilcat 0 #19 September 17, 2006 He is shameless...thats why I'm not going to donate my lower half to him as a transplant (or IMPLANT) Nanny Nanny Boob boo!~~April the Footless Wonder Camelot II, the Electric Boogaloo! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #20 September 17, 2006 QuoteHe is shameless...thats why I'm not going to donate my lower half to him as a transplant (or IMPLANT) Nanny Nanny Boob boo!~~April the Footless Wonder Damn, and you were my last hope. Chris _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #21 September 17, 2006 This thread has gotten way off track, but I just wanted you to know that there are people thinking about you. I hope you're doing better. Please let us know. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites agent_lead 0 #22 September 17, 2006 you know what really had me feeling like shit yesterday was the dream i had the night before...it was all about my ex girlfriend(the love of my life) and her new boyfrined and it just kinda got me remembering her and relaly missing her and the fact that ill most likley never see her ever again ( she lives in B.C. now and im in nyc) just kinda put me back in the mode and situation that i felt when we had just broken up a while back when i was with her i never jumped before..and when i lost her..the feelin really scared me inside..i started skydiving cuz i didnt care if i died.. and as i progressed thru aff...went to more DZ's...met LOTS of great people that i now consider very close friends...i realized that skydiving actually gave me a reason to live...and the whole deep depression that i was once in was gone...because i wasnt sitting in my house dwelling about where she was right now...i was out living my life with new friends and having a great fucking time in the process.... i didnt go to the DZ yesterday and i sat in my house alone...pretty much got me thinking about her again...and all the friends ive lost ( none to skydiving ) and i started feelng that oh so familiar feeling once again... i just felt like i needed to vent a little and maybe reach someone who once felt the same way about life...and it seems like i did by means of all the PM's ive received...thank you for those PM's everyone...they mean alot to me..and i will take in all the advice i was givin.. but the best advice i got was to stfu and go jump.. and thats todays plan...someone mentioned that maybe i shouldnt jump cuz i might not find a reason to pull...but that would never happen...when it all boils down..i dont want to die...i want to live..i just wish life could be a little easier to deal with sometimes... we all go thru stages in our lives when we arnt feeling up to par...its up to us and our friends to help get ourselves thru them...no matter which way it happens.. i slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... because thats really what life is all about...good times..and bad times..and little meaningless moments in between them... thanks for your support...i feel alot better..now im gonna go jump my ass off today to make up for yesterday... -agent-------------------------------------------- www.facebook.com/agentlead Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Michele 1 #23 September 17, 2006 Quotei slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... That's a great comment, and one I was hoping to find somewhere on this thread. Yes, there are times when it's just too hard to go on. So when those come, take a break for a bit from the running and the hustle and bustle, and just rest. Rest your body, mind, and soul...and when the resting's over, get back out there and play at 100%...even if you don't really want to. Have a spectacular day...look into the sky and know that's your playground. Look into the eyes of those you see today and know they're your friends. And find a peaceful spot in your soul to retreat to when it gets a bit too rough in the world...and then come back out and play. Hugs to you. Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites sartre 0 #24 September 17, 2006 Hope you're having a blast today! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #25 September 17, 2006 QuoteQuotei slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... That's a great comment, and one I was hoping to find somewhere on this thread. Yes, there are times when it's just too hard to go on. So when those come, take a break for a bit from the running and the hustle and bustle, and just rest. Rest your body, mind, and soul...and when the resting's over, get back out there and play at 100%...even if you don't really want to. Have a spectacular day...look into the sky and know that's your playground. Look into the eyes of those you see today and know they're your friends. And find a peaceful spot in your soul to retreat to when it gets a bit too rough in the world...and then come back out and play. Hugs to you. Ciels- Michele Absolutely! We all have bad days..."DOWN" times mentally and physically. When it seems like the down times vastly outnumber the good times you can get into that introspective, what's it all about - is it worth it funk. That's normal, you seem to realize it and 'know' a way to pull yourself out...get some air.GOOD ON YOU! As a couple of people here mentioned, look around at others and put YOUR problems in perspective... And other thing is to start surrounding yourself with 'up' and positive people, the vibe is contagious! My family is going through a difficult time with one of our kids, it's somewhat overtaken all of our lives...last week I was getting the old 'woe is me' syndrome...until I read here about 'Gawain' getting back in the air... ~That REALLY put MY trivial little bullshit in a better light, and gave me a LOT of strength of overcome the comparatively petty challenges I'M faced with. Max and people like him are truly HEROS in my eyes. Their strength and perseverance not only give me a goal to shoot for, but reinforce within me that the human spirit is unconquerable. My dad use to tell me~ Life is tough...get a helmet! Game ON! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0 Go To Topic Listing
agent_lead 0 #22 September 17, 2006 you know what really had me feeling like shit yesterday was the dream i had the night before...it was all about my ex girlfriend(the love of my life) and her new boyfrined and it just kinda got me remembering her and relaly missing her and the fact that ill most likley never see her ever again ( she lives in B.C. now and im in nyc) just kinda put me back in the mode and situation that i felt when we had just broken up a while back when i was with her i never jumped before..and when i lost her..the feelin really scared me inside..i started skydiving cuz i didnt care if i died.. and as i progressed thru aff...went to more DZ's...met LOTS of great people that i now consider very close friends...i realized that skydiving actually gave me a reason to live...and the whole deep depression that i was once in was gone...because i wasnt sitting in my house dwelling about where she was right now...i was out living my life with new friends and having a great fucking time in the process.... i didnt go to the DZ yesterday and i sat in my house alone...pretty much got me thinking about her again...and all the friends ive lost ( none to skydiving ) and i started feelng that oh so familiar feeling once again... i just felt like i needed to vent a little and maybe reach someone who once felt the same way about life...and it seems like i did by means of all the PM's ive received...thank you for those PM's everyone...they mean alot to me..and i will take in all the advice i was givin.. but the best advice i got was to stfu and go jump.. and thats todays plan...someone mentioned that maybe i shouldnt jump cuz i might not find a reason to pull...but that would never happen...when it all boils down..i dont want to die...i want to live..i just wish life could be a little easier to deal with sometimes... we all go thru stages in our lives when we arnt feeling up to par...its up to us and our friends to help get ourselves thru them...no matter which way it happens.. i slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... because thats really what life is all about...good times..and bad times..and little meaningless moments in between them... thanks for your support...i feel alot better..now im gonna go jump my ass off today to make up for yesterday... -agent-------------------------------------------- www.facebook.com/agentlead Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #23 September 17, 2006 Quotei slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... That's a great comment, and one I was hoping to find somewhere on this thread. Yes, there are times when it's just too hard to go on. So when those come, take a break for a bit from the running and the hustle and bustle, and just rest. Rest your body, mind, and soul...and when the resting's over, get back out there and play at 100%...even if you don't really want to. Have a spectacular day...look into the sky and know that's your playground. Look into the eyes of those you see today and know they're your friends. And find a peaceful spot in your soul to retreat to when it gets a bit too rough in the world...and then come back out and play. Hugs to you. Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sartre 0 #24 September 17, 2006 Hope you're having a blast today! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites airtwardo 7 #25 September 17, 2006 QuoteQuotei slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... That's a great comment, and one I was hoping to find somewhere on this thread. Yes, there are times when it's just too hard to go on. So when those come, take a break for a bit from the running and the hustle and bustle, and just rest. Rest your body, mind, and soul...and when the resting's over, get back out there and play at 100%...even if you don't really want to. Have a spectacular day...look into the sky and know that's your playground. Look into the eyes of those you see today and know they're your friends. And find a peaceful spot in your soul to retreat to when it gets a bit too rough in the world...and then come back out and play. Hugs to you. Ciels- Michele Absolutely! We all have bad days..."DOWN" times mentally and physically. When it seems like the down times vastly outnumber the good times you can get into that introspective, what's it all about - is it worth it funk. That's normal, you seem to realize it and 'know' a way to pull yourself out...get some air.GOOD ON YOU! As a couple of people here mentioned, look around at others and put YOUR problems in perspective... And other thing is to start surrounding yourself with 'up' and positive people, the vibe is contagious! My family is going through a difficult time with one of our kids, it's somewhat overtaken all of our lives...last week I was getting the old 'woe is me' syndrome...until I read here about 'Gawain' getting back in the air... ~That REALLY put MY trivial little bullshit in a better light, and gave me a LOT of strength of overcome the comparatively petty challenges I'M faced with. Max and people like him are truly HEROS in my eyes. Their strength and perseverance not only give me a goal to shoot for, but reinforce within me that the human spirit is unconquerable. My dad use to tell me~ Life is tough...get a helmet! Game ON! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
airtwardo 7 #25 September 17, 2006 QuoteQuotei slept it off and now im feeling energized...i cant wait to get out to the dz today and be around my friends...and have some good times... That's a great comment, and one I was hoping to find somewhere on this thread. Yes, there are times when it's just too hard to go on. So when those come, take a break for a bit from the running and the hustle and bustle, and just rest. Rest your body, mind, and soul...and when the resting's over, get back out there and play at 100%...even if you don't really want to. Have a spectacular day...look into the sky and know that's your playground. Look into the eyes of those you see today and know they're your friends. And find a peaceful spot in your soul to retreat to when it gets a bit too rough in the world...and then come back out and play. Hugs to you. Ciels- Michele Absolutely! We all have bad days..."DOWN" times mentally and physically. When it seems like the down times vastly outnumber the good times you can get into that introspective, what's it all about - is it worth it funk. That's normal, you seem to realize it and 'know' a way to pull yourself out...get some air.GOOD ON YOU! As a couple of people here mentioned, look around at others and put YOUR problems in perspective... And other thing is to start surrounding yourself with 'up' and positive people, the vibe is contagious! My family is going through a difficult time with one of our kids, it's somewhat overtaken all of our lives...last week I was getting the old 'woe is me' syndrome...until I read here about 'Gawain' getting back in the air... ~That REALLY put MY trivial little bullshit in a better light, and gave me a LOT of strength of overcome the comparatively petty challenges I'M faced with. Max and people like him are truly HEROS in my eyes. Their strength and perseverance not only give me a goal to shoot for, but reinforce within me that the human spirit is unconquerable. My dad use to tell me~ Life is tough...get a helmet! Game ON! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
