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Fatherhood and Skydiving

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My wife and I are having a baby and there is quite a bit of inner turmoil going on in my head about what my future in skydiving will be. I have not been skydiving very much since we married a year ago; however have always figured sometime in the near future I would be found around the DZ more frequently. And then comes a baby - which I am very excited about by the way.

I know my poll questions are rather vague and there could be many more scenarios, however I just wanted to jump start some discussion about other people experience about skydiving and parenthood. There is a similar archived discussion found in the Women’s forum, I just though I would cater one towards fathers; however lady skydivers please feel free to contribute.


np

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My wife and I are having a baby and there is quite a bit of inner turmoil going on in my head about what my future in skydiving will be. I have not been skydiving very much since we married a year ago; however have always figured sometime in the near future I would be found around the DZ more frequently. And then comes a baby - which I am very excited about by the way.

I know my poll questions are rather vague and there could be many more scenarios, however I just wanted to jump start some discussion about other people experience about skydiving and parenthood. There is a similar archived discussion found in the Women’s forum, I just though I would cater one towards fathers; however lady skydivers please feel free to contribute.


np



I raised my daughter around the dropzone. Shes 21 now. She grew up wondering why all the kids daddies didnt skydive.
Its entirely possible to be a good parent and a skydiver.....just do what you would do anyway...be careful.


bozo
Pain is fleeting. Glory lasts forever. Chicks dig scars.

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Skip, it's normal to consider hangin' up the rig for good but think about this first. I started jumping after I was a father and my wife is very supportive because she researched the technology in the equipment and understood that people are killed every day by the use of technologies. For example, the next time a jetliner crashes and kills 230 passengers are you going to quit flying to see your relatives on holidays? What about the next time someone is killed in a car accident, will you walk to work? We all know that jumping is dangerous just like flying Continental Airlines or driving a Toyota, but people continue to do so. Granted the jets and cars are for transportation and jumping is recreation but if it's where you find your inner smile then don't give it up. The one thing you don't want to do is harvest resentment on your family if you quit jumping. Most important is to do what you feel is best and if you feel the need to continue to jump, then keep that open communication with the wife. It's super important and hopefully she will understand and be supportive.

Does anyone else find it funny that we made a SPORT out of an EMERGENCY PROCEDURE?!?!

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as others have said there is a lot involved in risk managment that can make it safer. But it never makes it totaly safe. I have two young boys and a third on the way and I will continue to jump and make the choice I feel are acepitable risks.

Those are the same choice I make in everything I do, Driving in poor weather there have been many time pulling off at a rest stop or getting a room when i was on the road a lot, Staying another night to be rested in stead of working a full day then trying to cram a 6 hour drive home.

The important thing is what are the acepitabl RISKS to you and your wife ? (and not just in skydiving but life in whole)
SO this one time at band camp.....

"Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most."

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I think so much of it depends. TO me the sky will always be there. My son will never be two again. My daughter will only take her first steps once.

I miss skydiving terribly. I miss my wife and kids terribly when I'm at the damn grocery store. My thought process is that I would rather be with my kids than doing anything else. I'm a selfish man and I typically do what I want. What I want is to be with my family.

The interesting thing is that every time I have done something to take a few hours for myself I have been refreshed and realized that I needed a break. Said break usually starts at about 5:00 am and ends at 10:00 a.m. It happens once every six monts or so.

It's up to you what you feel comfortable with. I've probably spent three nights away from my son. None away from my daughter. Last time I went home to see my family I left at 8:00 p.m. so I could be home to make coffe the next morning. It's just the way I am.

I hope to introdcue my kids to the sport. The sky will always be there.


My wife is hotter than your wife.

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I did give up skydiving before my son was born and I wish I hadn't.... got divorced when he was 14 and I got custody. When he was 15 I came back to skydiving. The best thing I ever did was come back to skydiving. When he turned 16 he made a dozen jumps. :)

"Where troubles melt like lemon drops, away above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me" Dorothy

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I was a father when I started jumping. However, his mother and I were separated and later divorced. Much later...17 years later I became a father again after remarrying. I continued to skydive. Tried to be more conservative in many areas already suggested by previous posters.

Then, in 2005 my second wife was diagnosed with leukemia, a type with a very poor long-term prognosis. I haven't jumped since. Despite never being injured beyond a few bumps and scrapes in 25 years of jumping I know very well that good safety record can change dramatically on any jump. I won't take the chance on leaving my kids orphans (they are 8 & 9 years old right now) at some point in the future just so I can get my rocks off jumping. We don't really have family available to raise them if something happens to both of us so I have removed the risk of skydiving from the equation.

I plan to jump again when my kids are older...but I'll likely be over 65 by the time that happens.
--
Murray

"No tyranny is so irksome as petty tyranny: the officious demands of policemen, government clerks, and electromechanical gadgets." - Edward Abbey

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I think so much of it depends. TO me the sky will always be there. My son will never be two again. My daughter will only take her first steps once.

I miss skydiving terribly. I miss my wife and kids terribly when I'm at the damn grocery store. My thought process is that I would rather be with my kids than doing anything else. I'm a selfish man and I typically do what I want. What I want is to be with my family.

The interesting thing is that every time I have done something to take a few hours for myself I have been refreshed and realized that I needed a break. Said break usually starts at about 5:00 am and ends at 10:00 a.m. It happens once every six monts or so.

It's up to you what you feel comfortable with. I've probably spent three nights away from my son. None away from my daughter. Last time I went home to see my family I left at 8:00 p.m. so I could be home to make coffe the next morning. It's just the way I am.

I hope to introdcue my kids to the sport. The sky will always be there.



Very well said.

I sold the rig and gave it up last summer, realizing that my kids needed me around. This especially hit home after the twin otter crash at Quantum Leap last summer. Some of those guys would come jump at Archway, where I was then jumping. My kids looked at me differently after that crash... like, "dad, that could have been you." Neither they nor my wife ever asked me to quit. But I felt I should quit at least for now.

This in no way is meant to influence anybody else's decision. I did what I thought was right for my family. Before the crash at Quantum Leap, I was quite peaceful about jumping as a daddy.

Now, not so much. As lawrocket said, the sky will always be there... my childrens young years will not.

I miss Lee.
And JP.
And Chris. And...

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when or If i be a father in the future i don`t think i will give up either skydiving or BASE...staying conservative must be the key here, i`m not gonna stop living because of a fatherhood...we are surrounded with danger everywhere and no one have ever survived life yet...

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I gave up jumping when I got married as my wife didn't like the crowd at my dz. After about 6 or 7 years I convinced her that as we were in a different country etc I would like to start jumping again.

First visit to the dz there was a tragic accident (chance in a million) with 2 fatalities (person hit glider in free-fall). This didn't bother me as a personal risk. Second visit a few weeks later a person screwed up a low turn and died.

This made me re-evaluate my position as firstly a person ended their life less than 10meters from my children. A major consideration was whether I wanted to spend weekend time without my family (no) or expose them to death at close quarters in an environment where statistically it is quite likely to occur (again answer was no). As I final consideration I had to acknowledge that while I personally have always been extremely conservative I can't assume that someone or something else won't mess up my life.

As a result I chose to start tunnel flying which while it doesn't have the same thrills - certainly allows me to experience "flight" in a low risk environment. Perhaps when the kids are teenagers I will take it up again as I really loved the sport (hence my lurking here).
Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

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Just remember your babies are more important than skydiving. I love skydiving, but I lve my babies more. My son is 5 and my daughter is 3. I didn't get liscenced until after they were both born.
Divot your source for all things Hillbilly.
Anvil Brother 84
SCR 14192

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I have a baby coming in October. I plan to keep jumping, but I also plan to spend a lot less time at the DZ waiting on weather, drinking beer, etc. I'll probably cut back to one day a weekend, plus a winter trip to stay current.

I plan on keeping my Velo and swooping. If I thought it was going to kill me, I wouldn't jump it regardless of whether I was a father or not. I have an AAD. I pull on the high side. I don't jump with people who scare me. I get a good night's rest before a day at the DZ.

Most of my friends who golf didn't quit when they had children.

Canuck

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I'm young and have yet to "settle down" and start a family. However, life is constantly full of risks. If you love this sport, as you seem to, I don't see why you have to give it up. You can be a good father while still doing the things you love. Plus, I'm sure you kids will get sick of watching you stare at the sky, sighing about how "back when you were young," stories lol

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