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waltappel

Putting the "Fun" back in Funeral

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The horn started becoming undependable. I mean we had it fixed after the faux pas with the funeral. But while I was in college, I found that it would not blow when I wanted to.


Sounds like married life:D



So goddamn true sometimes! :D:D:D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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back in august of 2001, delivering one of my favorite bros that ever walked this planet to his final resting place, via dumping his ashes at one of our favorite fishing spots. after the services with many friends and family, and a very ugly drinking binge (lasted two days and damn near killed the rest of us) including his dad, brother, and of course all the bros from the neighborhood.

the plan, hook up my boat,grab plenty flowers(purple,green, and gold), grab the ashes, and bring closure to the whole thing. simple enough right.......... wrong, it was a logistical nightmare. at least to a bunch of drunk hungover delerious fucking fools anyway. with much help from all the moms and wifes we were on our way.

the entourage, our dearly departed(in this fucking elaborate box contraption), his wife(tara), brother ben B(benji), dave G (the proffessor), louis L (yeti), tommy wolfe(nuff said), and me the fuckin skipper.

we arrive at the boat launch. after about an hour or so of engine problems, by an engine sold to me by our honorary member no doubt. we were underway. finaly anchored on location well after nightfall, we begin to carry out the ceremony. a phone goes off during the moment of silence, its mom&pops, wanting to know if the deed is done. well perfect timing and all of the phone call we leave it on speakerphone for the finally. we say our piece, and the proffessor cranks up the generator, (7)500watt halogen floods come to life illuminating the surounding emerald green water with purple green and gold flowers everywhere. some of the most beautful scenery I have ever seen. and benji proceeds to dump the ashes from the bow. shaking the fucked up box thing, he gets some ashes pieces on the bow and on some of the lights that start smoking bigtime.

well in all the midst of smoke, and beers being thrown and hugs, and screams and utter madness we hear pops on speaker phone say "what happened one of you fucking assholes fall in the water" the professor says " ben threw him on the lights theyre smoking" pops replies "ya'll are smokin him WTF!!" man we almost died laughing, dont even know why that was so funny, or why we were laughing, maybe it's because we had closure, but everybody involved understood.

we were later told that we were a bunch of assholes, but eventually forgiven. that aside it was an absolutly beautiful scene that will be in my memories for ever. WTF sometimes these things don't go all exactly smooth you know, such is life.

btw, some of you guys stories in the thread are pretty awsome and funny as hell too, in the most respectful way of course.

good job hanging in there walt ;)
if you want a friend feed any animal
Perry Farrell

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The horn started becoming undependable. I mean we had it fixed after the faux pas with the funeral. But while I was in college, I found that it would not blow when I wanted to. But then figured out that if the steering wheel was in just the right position, I could blow the horn. :S:S:S



When did you start to lose your hearing? :):D

As for the original question...definitely Mike's funeral. :$:S:D

Blues,
Dave
"I AM A PROFESSIONAL EXTREME ATHLETE!"
(drink Mountain Dew)

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I have a tendency to put my foot in my mouth on occasion.... :S

After my friend's funeral everyone went back to his parent's home. His Dad was thanking us for all the photos we had sent saying he and Mark's mom + stepdad really appreciated the funny and silly photos we'd shared with them. I then (and I was 21 and am a girl) responded to his father... "you should see the ones from my bedroom." Followed by "uuhmm... I...I...I meant taken in my... oh nevermind." Luckily his Dad just thought that was hilarious and understood what I had meant as well.

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He's very amused. But now he can't respond. They did this on purpose



He posted this in the Women's Forum and he had no business posting it there. He was just trying to get around his banning.
She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

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He posted this in the Women's Forum and he had no business posting it there. He was just trying to get around his banning.


__________________________________________________
Actually, that's not true at all. He told me he was trying to earn one of your famous "skymama spankings."

He was all excited about it!;)

Mrs. WaltAppel

All things work together for good to them that love God...Romans 8:28

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Several years ago at a Harley shop I used to frequent there was a one armed harley mechanic. He had let all his friends know that when he died he wanted to be cremated in a bonfire with all of his bros partying around him He let his friends know that this was no joke and this iss what he actually wanted. Well he died. One of his friends in the group was a mortician. He looked into the legal aspects of this and found out that you could actually cremate a body as long as the body was stacked in with at least 6 cords of wood all burning at the same time. This would create enough flame and heat to completely consume the body. So they planned the outing, stacked 3 cords, placed him on the stack and buried him with the rest. It was one hell of a party. He got his wish and a good time was had by all. This story is the gods honest truth. Yea, we bikers know how to have fun. But so do we skydivers. Life is good.


I may be getting old but I got to see all the cool bands.

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OK...so my Dad's memorial service...

Did you know that funeral homes charge big $$$ for open casket memorial services to "dress the the deceased so as to look as natural as in life"? Well, who would have thunk it?
Now, did you know that funeral homes also charge big $$$ just to transport the deceased from the morgue to the funeral home and back again? Well, who would have thunk it?

He was going to be cremated anyway so what's the diff?

Being the basic cheap bastard that I am, my sister too, (we got if from Dad, for sure) we opted to have the closed casket without him in it knowing that none of the visitors would know the difference.

Well, Dad was a big guy...6'4" ~250lbs. So the casket should have been heavy, right?

Well, one of his girlfriends just "had" to say goodbye and tried to lift the lid and the whole thing shifted around and rocked at her efforts (fortunately we had the foresight to ensure the lid was locked) .

Before I could stop them, two of his buddies went to straighten things out and when they lifted and noticed the lack of weight, the surprised look of realization on their faces was simply, astoundingly hilarious to me and I cracked up. I couldn't help it.

Of course I got weird-assed stares and frowns from those not in-the-know but I couldn't stop.

The guys that moved the casket never did say anything and just walked off towards the back of the room.

In a sick sort of way, it was funny to watch all those ladies talking to him thinking he was in the casket.
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

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I've never quite understood why people feel the need to view the dead. The last friend I viewed had the tip of his nose turning blue. Thats the last image I have of him. From that point on I have never viewed the dead. I will remember them as they were in life. I can still say goodbye without seeing them.


I may be getting old but I got to see all the cool bands.

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He's very amused. But now he can't respond. They did this on purpose



He posted this in the Women's Forum and he had no business posting it there. He was just trying to get around his banning.



While they are going for a head-down record in Chi-Town, Walt is going for a beat-down record in DZ.com
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

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He's very amused. But now he can't respond. They did this on purpose



He posted this in the Women's Forum and he had no business posting it there. He was just trying to get around his banning.


While they are going for a head-down record in Chi-Town, Walt is going for a beat-down record in DZ.com


Yeah, they probably use my posts to train new moderators.:D:D

Walt

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Not precisely a funeral story, but...

My bro-in-laws mother had an overweight mixed-breed dog that went everywhere with her. Plus, everyday they went through the ice cream place drive-thru and got a dish for the dog also.

The vet told her that the dog was overweight and no more ice cream or it would kill him. She didn't listen and it did.

She puts the "I" in weIrd. She was so distraught that she bought a real coffin. Weirder, to fit, it had to be a childs size (which freaks you out).

Problem 1 - dogs are not people shaped.
Problem 2 - rigor mortis had set in.

There we were out in the garage doing the hokey-pokey. "Ok, I've got the front foot in, but now the back foot is out". So... you apply some pressure.

Finally, dog is in the casket. What to do with an occupied casket? Bury it in the back yard, of course.

So, after an interesting day, we are now in the back yard at 11pm, digging a hole and putting a small casket in it.

What the neighbors thought, I do not know.

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I met Walt over the phone 3 days after Bob died. He just wanted me to know that everything was done to save Bob's life. We emailed alot and talked on the phone quite a bit after Bob's memorial service. I finally got to meet the new "Hero" in my life on May 5th.

Bob is my big brother. He has always been my hero and will always be. I have added walt to my list of hero's. I love you, Walt.

Terri
B.O.B.'s little sister

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