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tomvailco

Worried Girlfriend

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It all depends on the girl really. Mine has the attitude of "I'll always be concerned when I know you're jumping out of airplanes" but at the same time she knows how much I enjoy myself and how much it keeps me sane/takes my mind off other stressful stuff. Also she has expressed an interest in jumping herself but hasn't the funds to do so realisticly.

For a 5 month long relationship you really don't have that much invested and you SHOULD be able to make an informed decision...unless its really that good and you're letting your other head think for you...
Someday Never Comes

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Does she give good head?

If so lie to her and tell her you are playing golf.

If not find another girl.



LOOOL

hm, maybe woman should come equipped with a cutaway pillow too?!

Ofcourse I dont mean all the wonderful woman that read these forums. :P

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I had a very similar thing with a girl I started seeing shortly after I started skydiving, although I never brought her to the DZ. The more she complained about it, the more I went skydiving.... I did a lot of jumps at that time.
Eventually I performed an intentional cutaway.
Now I am with a girl who doesn't mind, she does a lot of her own sports so she can understand it better.

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I really like this one.



:)
Listen to her. Tell her how you really feel. Be honest about what you really want. When you come up against "A lifetime with the woman of my dreams vs. Skydiving" and skydiving wins - you're not worth being with anyway.

I've lost fewer GF's to this sport than I've had cutaways, but for the right woman, I'd sell my gear and read the Sunday papers over coffee in a heartbeat. 22 years in the sport and 5000 dives are nothing compared to true love.

t
It's the year of the Pig.

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but for the right woman, I'd sell my gear and read the Sunday papers over coffee in a heartbeat. 22 years in the sport and 5000 dives are nothing compared to true love.

you say that because you know Taz will never ask you to stop :D
scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM

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I went thru something similar with my husband before I started jumping in 03. I can chalk my issue up to not being educated about the sport. While, you can do everything right and still die, skydiving has made leaps and bounds where safety and advancements are concerned. Being uneducated about any extreme sport will naturally produce fears. One thing that I remember calming my uncertainties was my hubby had three videos, Pack Like a Pro, Fly like a Pro ( I think) and one on Cutaways and different malfunctions. When he first started jumping he watched the later two endlessly and since we had one tv, I too watched them endlessly. Also, I spent a good amount of time at the DZ as well. Try discussing with her, what exactly it is that makes her nervous, do your homework, so her the facts, look at the fatality database and what caused the accidents. There are alot more accidents from carelessness and complacency than gear failure or other things like that. Hope this helps....:)

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I think you can try to explain all the safety aspect, but in the end you are just pacifying her.

You can die skydiving, you may fuck up, kill yourselves, and she is going to be left to grieve.

The fact that she wants you to be ultimately happy, must balance with the fact that she wants you to be around for a while.

You have taken the risk of dying in return for how skydiving makes you feel. Since you are dating she needs to buy into that as well.

Besides, after dating for only 5 months she needs to realize that she has no right to tell you what you can and can't do. :|
"The restraining order says you're only allowed to touch me in freefall"
=P

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I had similar issues with my daughter - she is pregnant with my 1st grandchild. She gave me "I want the baby to grow up knowing her grandpa" guilt trip. I sat down with her and explained the mechanics of skydiving, the training that is involved before you're allowed to on your own and the built in safety aspects ie; AAD's. While she said she understand all of that she still didn't understand WHY I want to skydive. Instead of trying to explain further I asked her to read my favorite poem, afterwards she said she still didn't like it but now understands why I dive. Here's the poem, for me it explains it all, perhaps it will help your girlfriend understand too.

HIGH FLIGHT

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I've climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there
I've chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air.
Up, up the long delirious, burning blue,
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew -
And, while with silent lifting mind I've trod
The high untresspassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand and touched the face of God.

Pilot Officer Gillespie Magee
No 412 squadron, RCAF
Killed 11 December 1941

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Hey, I don't know if I've seen ya around the DZ, but congrats on being close to your A, and once ya have it, find me and we'll do a jump or 5. I'm the guy with black and orange everything.

About the girl... Get her jumping, or cutaway. It's a new relationship, and you're already having this problem. No good. Not to mention that even if she didn't care about you jumping, the fact that you're all lovey dovey but not spending your weekends together as a couple is gunna drive her, and who knows, maybe even you, nuts.

Or, based on her qualities you claim, I'm sure you can find someone in the main hangar to take good care of her while you're on the otter... remember, I'm the one in black and orange. :P

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Damn...finally.

All these "cut tha bitch loose holmes...bachelor for life YO B|" responses come from people who either haven't found the right woman yet, or really don't want to.

It's really kind of early in the relationship, so any advice is probably presumptious. If she's the one, you should probably be able to solve this one by discussing the matter in a rational (women>and if she's only worried about the bounce part instead of wanting to control every aspect of your life, abandoning skydiving might not be such a bad choice.

Now then, show us the goods.

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Besides, after dating for only 5 months she needs to realize that she has no right to tell you what you can and can't do. :|


No-one in a relationship has the right to tell you what you can or can't do.
You don't "own" a person.

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hm, maybe woman should come equipped with a cutaway pillow too?!

Quote



Most have a sort of AAD: If they do not jump and you keep jumping they will automatically fly away.

But if they do jump (tandems do not count) you must treat them as you treat your own brand new rig: with a lot of love, care and respect, let others see them but do not let them touch, keep them covered while not flying them, do not leave them under direct sun, do not leave them alone, untwist immediately any twisted thing, after landing be attentive and do not just relax and leave them laying on the ground, immediately stow their brakes, etc, and mainly keep all their handles protected (remember there are more skydivers around).

A final word: Your reserve must be always ready . . .

Gonzalo

It cannot be done really means I do not know how to do it ... yet

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WARNING: NEWBIE RESPONSE

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All she has seen is a couple of cutaways, and heard stories of course.



You've been in the sport for 11 jumps and your girlfriend has seen a couple of cutaways???

Wow...that would be 'cause for concern, for me anyway.



Sounds a bit light for a busy DZ. With 300-500 jumps a day and an average interval between cutaways of 600-1000 jumps you an expect at least one a weekend during the summer at a medium sized DZ.

OTOH, in over a decade I've only seen one non-fatal reserve malfunction (which may have been avoidable by using more modern gear)

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>No-one in a relationship has the right to tell you what you can or can't do.

In a good relationship, you don't tell people what to do - you care about what they want enough that you find a way to make it work.


That is exactly my point. Not that I have much field experience anyway...

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Unless she has DD natural rack or bigger, disregard her comments and move on.;)
I could never see giving up something I love doing because someone can't accept the things I do. If someone loves you, they should support everything you do and who you are as a person. I think I'd laugh is some girl wanted me to stop doing something I love..ahaha Next thing you know, she'll ask you to stop masturbating.
It's really up to you in the situation though, does the girl mean more to you than the freedom of living your life how you want to?

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My only suggestion if you've decided to keep her is to watch for signs that you are being manoeuvred out of jumping. Like when you plan to go jumping on a Saturday and then she has other plans that need you.

Thats what happened to me, over time I was jumping less and less, until it was just gone.

Not saying that your woman is like like that, just that my wife was.




I could see her trying to do that eventually



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My only suggestion if you've decided to keep her is to watch for signs that you are being manoeuvred out of jumping. Like when you plan to go jumping on a Saturday and then she has other plans that need you.

Thats what happened to me, over time I was jumping less and less, until it was just gone.

Not saying that your woman is like like that, just that my wife was.




I could see her trying to do that eventually



Look at the up side! If it happens to you like it did to me, you get to give someone half your stuff :P
"Where troubles melt like lemon drops, away above the chimney tops, that's where you'll find me" Dorothy

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WARNING: NEWBIE RESPONSE



You've been in the sport for 11 jumps and your girlfriend has seen a couple of cutaways???

Wow...that would be 'cause for concern, for me anyway.

I've got 160 some jumps and have only seen 2 cutaways (not including my accident reserve handle pull on jump #6 two out incident). Granted we are a little 182 dz, but that seems like a lot to me.



Not my own cutaways. luckily I'm still on zero personally B|



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:)
Listen to her. Tell her how you really feel. Be honest about what you really want. When you come up against "A lifetime with the woman of my dreams vs. Skydiving" and skydiving wins - you're not worth being with anyway.

I've lost fewer GF's to this sport than I've had cutaways, but for the right woman, I'd sell my gear and read the Sunday papers over coffee in a heartbeat. 22 years in the sport and 5000 dives are nothing compared to true love.

t



What I can't have my cake and eat it too?? B|

I see a guy at mile hi every once in a while and he has a wife and two kids there with him. What do you think about that?



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