RkyMtnHigh 0 #26 May 29, 2008 Quote hehe.. was that my old number? Yes _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,384 #27 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote Could be worse...they could be selling Amway...not much scares those people... I'm still trying to find a way to scare the mormons or jehova witness folks that knock at my door! I've tried opening with no shirt on and exposing my crazy tattoo's. Also tried telling them I'm athiest/satanist but they are fairly set on saving my immortal soul. Just try what I did to a JW (not knowing who was knocking): Open the door dripping wet with one hand holding the towel wrapped around you.Or what my old college buddy Crazy Larry (VN-vet, ex-SpecOps) did deliberately: Squeeze the blood out of a steak you were just about to throw on the grill, rub it all over your face, stick the steak on the end of your Gerber Mk 1, then holding the knife in one hand, open the door with your other hand while screaming: "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT??? WE'RE TRYING TO HAVE A HUMAN SACRIFICE HERE!!!" "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #28 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote Could be worse...they could be selling Amway...not much scares those people... I'm still trying to find a way to scare the mormons or jehova witness folks that knock at my door! I've tried opening with no shirt on and exposing my crazy tattoo's. Also tried telling them I'm athiest/satanist but they are fairly set on saving my immortal soul. Let them talk for a second. Watch attentively like they are saying the most important thing in the world. (If the woman speaks, look at her boobies.) Then, walk up and put both your hands on the sides of their heads. Bow your head for 3 seconds and then scream, "HEAL... I command Satan to leave theez PEEPUL" If they back up, approach and repeat. There is nothing scarier to crazy people than a crazier person. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tmaricle55 0 #29 May 29, 2008 Quote There is nothing scarier to crazy people than a crazier person. Did you get that from Jeff Foxworthy? Muff Brother # 3883, SCR # 14796 ICD # 1 - Pres. Yeah, I noticed and I think it's funny! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #30 May 29, 2008 Quote So I txtmsg a dz.commer and didnt realize that they changed their cell #. The current person with that number keeps txt msg me and calling me "LUVER" and although I keep telling him/her/whoever that I mistakenly sent them a txt thinking it was another person, they keep txt msg'ing me with Luver messages! grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.... So - you TM'd Cocheese?I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #31 May 29, 2008 Bill.. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #32 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote There is nothing scarier to crazy people than a crazier person. Did you get that from Jeff Foxworthy? No, but I could have. Jeff makes so much sense because he is just pointing out what we see. A lot of his material is from what people tell him. Humor without anger. At Ruth Eckerd hall (swanky theater venue in Clearwater), most of the parking lot had tires higher than my car roof. I saw the four of them live during the BCC tour and then again at the movie premiere. Way too funny. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #33 May 29, 2008 Quote Bill.. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you. Well that makes One of Us.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MrStranger3001 0 #34 May 29, 2008 I tried hitting on a JW chic one time. She was trying to talk to me about god and such, I just kept asking her name and what she was doing that weekend. She kept glancing over at the older lady with her like she was gonna get in trouble if she answered me. Needless to say she didn't give me her number. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #35 May 29, 2008 Quote Bill.. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you. But you are a Ga gal, so you have to say it properly... "JAY-BUS lubbs YOO." You need to hear Judeen, Judelle and Belva Chalk doing "hog tie me up". clicky Born and raised in Boggy Depot, Oklahoma Banned from Christianity forever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #36 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote Bill.. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you. Well that makes One of Us. Why not? If I was a gay man, I'd think I was sexy. (It's beyond my control.) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #37 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote Quote Bill.. I just want you to know that Jesus loves you. Well that makes One of Us. Why not? If I was a gay man, I'd think I was sexy. (It's beyond my control.) I knew there was narcisism in there! When are you getting married to you?I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,384 #38 May 29, 2008 Quote Quote Did you get that from Jeff Foxworthy? No, but I could have. Jeff makes so much sense because he is just pointing out what we see. A lot of his material is from what people tell him. Humor without anger. At Ruth Eckerd hall (swanky theater venue in Clearwater), most of the parking lot had tires higher than my car roof. I saw the four of them live during the BCC tour and then again at the movie premiere. Way too funny. You must admire a guy who makes his living from rednecks paying money to see him making fun of them.In the late '80's I saw a standup comedian at a nightclub in W Lafayette IN, when I was there in college at Purdue. His humor was largely about rednecks, and he was razor-sharp, even doing unscripted bantering with members of the audience. This was several years before anyone had heard of Foxworthy, and to this day I wonder if that was Foxworthy I saw that night."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #39 May 29, 2008 QuoteYou must admire a guy who makes his living from rednecks paying money to see him making fun of them. There are lots of self-deprecating comedians. I believe it is a sign of health that people can laugh at their own mannerisms. Black, hispanic, white, asian. Lots of ethnic self humor. Loads of Jewish and Catholic religious humor. A lot of rednecks look at lifestyle as a matter of pride. Like many people, they can't understand a big-city lifestyle. (It would probably drive me nuts) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #40 May 29, 2008 Quote I knew there was narcisism in there! When are you getting married to you? I have just resigned myself to public opinion. If women love unemployed, middle-aged drunks, who am I to understand? When I was younger, it was my bod. Now, I think they yearn for the "inner swine" that drives my being. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites