The f*ckin' names some people give their kids!

[RastaRicanAir 0]

Along with affording me an opportunity to ease the lives of countless helpless children, my de-facto current job in the E/R of a large and renowned children's hospital has -over time- concretely convinced me of two things:
1) Children truly are the future
2) That future will inevitably end with those children or their children living in trees and flinging their own sh*t at each other if we don't immediately institute some sort of license requirement -including a mandatory minimum IQ score- for people to become parents.

Tonight I met a woman who apparently wanted her young son to be treated with respect over the span of his incipient life, so she was sure to give him a name commanding that respect from others (whether they were giving it sincerely or not).
That lucky 9-year-old boy's God-given Surname: Finley
His Mother-given First Name: Mister
Yes, that proud boy will one day grow up to be MR. MISTER FINLEY

But wait, there's more!
His arrival was quickly followed by a visit by two siblings whose parents happened to have much in common before they were married. The father was born a Rodriguez. The mother also born a Rodriguez. So with boundless Latino family pride, and to avoid confusion as to who their babies belonged to, they named their 18 month old daughter:
Sabrina Rodriguez Rodriguez
and her lucky 4 month old brother Carlos Rodriguez Rodriguez

I see midnight is approaching, and with it, the end of my shift. I leave you now to go home and weep for the future.

OrFunV/LocoBoca Rodriguez/Sonic Grieco/Muff Brother #4411
-"and ladies....messin with Robbie is venturing into territory you cant even imagine!-cuz Robbie is

[Andrewwhyte 1]

My favorite:
http://www.baseball-reference.com/bullpen/Wonderful_Monds

[BIGUN 1,050]

Within the Spanish culture; baby names are traditionally made of two or more names accompanied by the father and mother’s last names, in that order.

Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard.

[skybill 18]

Hi Rasta-man!!!,
Dig it dude, like there's this tune we used to sing when I was in the 4th grade,"My Father's name was Ferdinan and my Mother's name was Lizer.. so when I came into this world they caled me "Fertalizer" !!!!!!LOL"....The beat goes on!!

SCR-2034, SCS-680

III%,
Deli-out

[GaryRay 0]

a guy i work with named his child "Baylian" yeah go fucking figure. he's retarded.

JewBag.
www.jewbag.wordpress.com

[davadikian 0]

Robbie can you say HIPPA violation??

Ive worked at various ER's where they would keep patient info stickers on a wall in the back room with any "interesting" names. It was usually right next to the xrays of any patients that accidentally "lost" an object.

"It was a one in a million shot" -Seinfeld

[Baksteen 84]

There is nothing wrong with the French name Jean-Marie. Yet that name becomes wrong somehow if the father's name is John and the mother's name is Mary.

An acquaintance of mine gave birth a few eeks ago. When looking for names she first decided that "Rymmin" sounded nice. Until we told her to google "Rimming", which is when she decided to change the name to "Bliss", which as far as names go is only marginally better for a Dutch country girl.

"That formation-stuff in freefall is just fun and games but with an open parachute it's starting to sound like, you know, an extreme sport."
~mom

[BikerBabe 0]

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the funniest site on the internet.

http://notwithoutmyhandbag.com/babynames/

I can't even get through the first page before i'm in tears of laughter.

Never meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!

[mx757 4]

you should see names the blacks are giving their kids....


if I were hiring manager and resume came with those names I'd throw it in trash...

[chrismgtis 0]

Hey my parents gave me the middle name Lynn and I'm male. It was in honor of an uncle that died before I was born, but was still a pita in the school.

Rodriguez Brother #1614, Muff Brother #4033
Jumped: Twin Otter, Cessna 182, CASA, Helicopter, Caravan

[popsjumper 2]

As you sow, so shall you reap.

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[peregrinerose 0]

I had a patient named Nemesis (mom thought it was a pretty word, had no clue what it meant). Another named Vagina (pronounced Va GEE na). And another named Apartheid.

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda

[apollard24 0]

Haha! I guess Mistre is better than Zuma.

Are we still going on sunday night?

Breathe out so I can breathe you in...

[jceman 1]

We had a patient on the ward at George AFB named Stanley S. Stanley.

One guess what the "S." stood for.

Faster horses, younger women, older whiskey, more money.

Why do they call it "Tourist Season" if we can't shoot them?

[BlindBrick 0]

Well at least I don't feel so bad about naming my kid Aurora Gale anymore.

-Blind

"If you end up in an alligator's jaws, naked, you probably did something to deserve it."

[shropshire 0]

Hey, has anyone sen Mike Hunt?

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

[kenz 0]

Quote

Well at least I don't feel so bad about naming my kid Aurora Gale anymore.

-Blind

isn't that the baby's name from willow? it's still cute though i like it

and seriously celebrities need to stop having children and giving them awful names - someone mentioned zuma before - apple, coco, suri, birdie, honor, pilot inspector

edited to add: some actress chick had twin girls and named them sawyer lucia and cocoa trinity - i swear these parents hate their children

"life does throw curveballs sometimes but it doesn't mean we shouldn't still swing for the homerun" ~ me

[Jewels 0]

I know a family with the last name of "Apple." They named one of their daughters "Candy."

TPM Sister #102

[BillyVance 34]

Quote

I know a family with the last name of "Apple." They named one of their daughters "Candy."

Well it could be worse. What if her last name was Ass?

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[BillyVance 34]

Oh by the way, did you see the track and field portion of the Olympics? There was a girl from team USA whose first name was Queen, I think. She has two sisters, named Empress and Princess. Apparently, their father wanted to push them to excell in life. Well, Queen didn't even make the final in her event, and boy did she look like a snob.

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

[Hausse 0]

Man this is a good one:

I was thinking of naming my son Toolio. Does anyone know the origin on that one?
---[Jane] DeSac

Toolio DeSac. Boy, can't think of any way that kid'll get picked on. That's one taunt-proof name there!

[millertimeunc 0]

No, but I'm really good friends with Mike Hawk. He's always stood up for me when I needed him.

The best things in life are dangerous.

[millertimeunc 0]

Quote

We had a patient on the ward at George AFB named Stanley S. Stanley.

One guess what the "S." stood for.

Ummm...nothing, it was just an "S"?

The best things in life are dangerous.

[iluvtofly 0]

Quote

No, but I'm really good friends with Mike Hawk. He's always stood up for me when I needed him.

I actually work with a guy whos real life name is Mike Hawk spelled just like that.

[iluvtofly 0]

http://www.infoplease.com/spot/celebrity-baby-names.html

I love how they have to specify son or daughter because by the name itself you can't tell most of the time.