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BillyVance

I need to grow up (long)

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I've got to, or I will keep getting hurt. :S

My little girl wanted to go out to the playground for a while yesterday morning. It was a beautiful day outside, not a cloud in sight, just a bit cool. So I took her out there and let her run around. Then we gravitated over to the swings. These are the ones with the flexible rubber seats that hang in a "U" when you sit on them. I got her up on one and got her started with a few pushes, then got on the one next to her. Within seconds I was swinging about as hard as I dared, going hard enough that the chains went slack at the very top of the swing arc so that I was suspended in mid-air, and then my weight would jerk the chains tight again as I started the backward swing. I was probably on the 4th or 5th time when it happened. I was getting up to about 8 feet off the ground at the top of the forward swing and probably about 6 feet off the ground when my weight brings the chains taut on the way back down. The chain broke at the seat on the left side and down I went, like a sack of potatoes. BLAMMO!!!

It's kind of hard to describe what I went through those first few seconds of writhing, thrashing and convulsing on the ground after impact, but I could not scream when I wanted to. Man that FUCKING HURT! Right there in my lower back where I had problems in the past. I have to be thankful the playground had a thick layer of that shredded wood or whatever it is, and not hard packed dirt or pebbles, because I'd probably have broken something.

When the shock started to wear off and I stopped thrashing around and realized I could sit up, I noticed my daughter was standing next to me and several adults were trying to ask me if I was okay. All I could say was I think so. Well, I decided I had better go home and told my girl it was time to go, as we'd already been there close to an hour. She didn't want to go. I didn't want to yell at her out there so I just picked her up in my best grimace and walked stiffly back to the car, almost collapsing a couple of times with stinging shooting pains in my back. I texted my wife that the swing broke and my back hurts and I'm coming home.

I pull in, she's already outside and getting our girl out of the car seat and I find that I can't get out by myself, and I can't walk without leaning on my 6 months pregnant wife without going into jerky convulsions. Shit. Fuck. Damn. I went straight to bed and I was feeling tired and told her I wanted to take a nap.

She'd never seen me in this much pain before, as it looked way worse than what I went through last year, and I found her waking me up and telling me that we're going to the ER. (groan) I figured with my back history, better to be safe than sorry. By the time we arrived at the hospital, it had been 3 hours since I fell and even walking with help was like torture. She pulled us right up to the ER ramp and got a wheelchair for me. I figured, fuck, I'm gonna be here at least 5 hours or more just to find out what the hell is wrong. The waiting room was mostly empty. It's my lucky day! Got in the examination room within 30 minutes, X-rays taken within the next 15 minutes, and another 30 minutes later I was given the good news, nothing broken. Got a prescription for Vicodin and it was off to the pharmacy. I don't remember much of the rest of the day and last night to be honest, that's some good shit there. :D

This morning was the same. I could barely walk without that stabbing pain in my lower back. I rested in the recliner most of the day zoned out on the pain killer. Then this afternoon around 5 pm I got up to go to the bathroom. Getting out of the chair hurt, but I found walking a lot less painful. Awesome...

I hope I will feel a lot better tomorrow and be back to my good old ornery self in a week. But damn, I have got to grow up. :S No more playground shit from now on. I will just sit my ass down or follow my little girl from a safe distance and not get on anything if I don't have to.

Skydiving is safer than riding on the swings, go figure. :S
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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Billy billy billy.....(shakes head)

Be careful will you!

You better have good medical insurance cause rate you are going I can just image next weeks injury...:P

TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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I just happen to be watching the 100 most outragous moments.

I'm watching people get hurt and laughing at them.

With that in mind, I'm sorry youre in pain but I am glad its nothing serious because the thought of seeing that put me into hysterics.
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I just happen to be watching the 100 most outragous moments.

I'm watching people get hurt and laughing at them.

With that in mind, I'm sorry youre in pain but I am glad its nothing serious because the thought of seeing that put me into hysterics.



I texted futuredivot that he missed a great laugh. I sure wish somebody had gotten it on video. :D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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I remember the exact moment that I came to realization that if I was going to get hurt or do something stupid that I wish someone was able to see it and get a good laugh.


I was in Korea. I was walking home from somewhere.
It was late and snowing. I walked across the street in the painted white walkway.

I stepped on the painted area and pulled one of those tom and jerry moments where it looked like I was running but not going anywhere.

I ALMOST busted my ass. By Almost I mean My legs almost did a split but stopped just short of hitting my nuts on the pavement. I gathered my self and started to walk away dissapionted that no one was able to see that until. ONE person, waiting in the bus stop across the street, finally caught their breath and thanked me for making their night.


I shouted back "I am glad someone was their to witness that. If I busted my ass for no reason it wouls have sucked."
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Heal well and quickly, BV. Back and neck injuries suck major ass- no need to tell you.[:/]

On the lighter side, I hope I have the opportunity one day to hear your daughter's side of the story. She'll bust you out and then, I suspect, we'll get the "rest of the story".

Did you do a thorough gear check?

Clark

You can't make chicken salad out of chicken manure.

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You knew that that you were too uncurrent to try that swingloading.



:D:D:D:D
“The sum of intelligence on the planet is a constant; the population is growing.” - George Bernard Shaw
He who dies with the most toys, wins.....
dudeist skydiver # 19515
Buy quality and cry once!

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Sorry you got hurt. Hope you heal well and fast.

Did you read the warning label on the swing?
They aren't built for adult weights.

Mythbusters did the "Looping the Swing" a while back, and Tory (Junior mythbuster) did the exact same thing. They had padding under it, but he was still shaken up.
"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy

"~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo

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You think growing up is safer?

No Shit there I was, using the weekend to do a little house work.

So I snatched up the laundry basket and turned to head over the the washer. HOLY SHIT! Who shot me in the sholder!?!?! With my momentum I stumble in to the now dropped laundry basket and trip, as I pitch toward the floor I realize I still have the basket in my right hand and it is blocking both my legs from moving, thus blocking any cool Ninja like recovery. Well hell I'll just brace with my left hand, oh wait the left shoulder was where I just got shot, so I am now going to get a serious rug burn. Well no rug burns if I dropped the basket from my right hand and brace that way, oh wait better yet roll with it and ala Jerry Lewis I am back on my feet!

Well that didn't go right. I dropped the basket and attempted to roll only to get my feet, yes feet not foot, tangled in the damn thing and down I go! BAM! I'm down like a WWE wrester and the basket is headed UP like it is coming off the top turnbuckle. Now I am kind of on my right side, pinning my right arm adnd any chance of defense I have to the floor. Seeing the basket reach its apogy and start down toward my head, I think, "Oh Fucking lovely".

As it decends it disgorges all its contents, socks, under wear, t-shirts, jeans and towels. SO I resign myself to my fate, I am to be knocked out by the Laundry Basket, OK fine, just don't let my my "knocked out cold" face be covered by my under wear, I just think the EMT's would post pics on flicker and then argue over who had to see if I was alive!

There is a God and he gave me a miracle! The basket lands next to me and falls away from me! Whoo hoo I am saved! Now to quickly get up and reload the basket and finish the trip to the washer before any one ses this! All one "armed".

SO in pain I get the fiorst load in the wash, head over to the mini drug store we commonly refer to as the "Top of the Fridge" and load up on the pain and anti inflamatory pills. As I down the pills my 13 years old daughter walks by carrying a bra, shacking her head and not saying a word (I wonder where she got that attitude from?:)), goes to the washer checks it is the right colors and tosses it in, as she walks back out of the kitchen headed back down the hall way where the scene of my near demise took place she says: "Found that hanging on the lamp there Emmit Smith, that was funny".

Shit She saw me crash and burn[:/]

So you see growing up can be just as dangerous!

Hope your feeling better!
Matt

An Instructors first concern is student safety.
So, start being safe, first!!!

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Thanks everyone. I am feeling much better. I'm now able to walk around on my own without the jerking motions like Cliff Clavin being shocked with the remote control shock therapy thing on a Cheers episode. :P There are still moments when the muscle spasms hit without warning and down I'll go. At the very least I'm glad there are no broken or cracked bones. My ass is sore now from where I landed, and my abs and jaw muscles are sore from the constant clenching over the past two days.

I am sure I missed a $10,000 prize from America's Funniest Videos if somebody had been there to catch the whole damn thing. [:/]

Oh and divot: swingloading? Now that's classic! :D:D:D

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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