shropshire 0 #26 February 21, 2009 Jeeeeze - I'm embarrassed that she's a Brit (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DJL 232 #27 February 21, 2009 First, try an internet search for something you need: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=spine&aq=f&oq="I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #28 February 21, 2009 I've read all the posts, and hopefully she is no longer in your house. If she is...then my questions to you is...why aren't you having your partner deal with the situation? It's her friend and she should take responsibility for her friendship. If the friendship breaks down afterward then it wasn't worth having in the first place. Just my .02 and yes you may toss the penny for my thoughts back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,381 #29 February 21, 2009 You should have just proposed a threesome: If she got insulted and left, you win!If she accepted, you win!Of course there could have been unfortunate side-effects if your partner wasn't into it. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #30 February 21, 2009 DUDE.. What a pain.. I've just created a poll re my extremely annoying house-mate.. Living with inconsiderate people is *such* a drag.. At least in your case you had the option of kicking her out. Lets hope when she packed she actually left. Meanwhile, changing or adding a new lock isn't as expensive as you might think If she wants to come back, you can always tell her it will cost her whatever she owes you, upfront, in cash, before she moves in. She'll never come up with the money. And if she does, you can take it and still not let her back in - it was money *owed* anyway!!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jonstark 8 #31 February 21, 2009 Quote She came downstairs and said to me.... "Do you think when i am still asleep, that you might be able to make sure you lift your feet when you walk past my bedroom door"..... The girl is packing now. Buwahaha!!! That is rich. She must really have been tuned to the moon. Good for you... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nitrochute 2 #32 February 21, 2009 send her to me. i will turn her out. always need another HO for my stable LOL seriously tho, did she actually leave? good for you , putting your foot down Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #33 February 21, 2009 Looks like you've got it handled...all it took was to push ya to the brink of insanity! 3 months and how many thousands of dollars later...your guest wasn't 'visiting' she was hiding from her life, freeload off your good nature. We have a pretty big home and have guests in & out now & then, ~family or friends...I kinda go through a list of 'house rules' at the very start just so everyone is on the same page. Ya don't have to be a dick about it, I just lay out in a nice way something along the lines of...lets make sure were better friends when you leave than when you came. I mention things like please don't touch the guns, parachutes or motorcycles without me being there...my life depends on those things being exactly the way I put them. Keep the house locked at night, don't beat the kids or dogs etc. There's a TV in every bedroom so please don't lounge in front of the big screen in the living room, I work from home and it's a distracting temptation for me to join you. AND~ My #1 rule is Guests don't have Guests. Like you, it just makes me uncomfortable to have someone I don't know, that I didn't invite in my home...I tossed a friend of my 'partner' once, when I came home unexpectedly and she was doing some guy on the couch. I can empathize with what you feel, you get conflicted about trying to be a good host, but can start to feel like a doormat... when it hits the point where you are unhappy in your own home, something has to change. Sometimes people tend to mistake kindness for weakness, it's your house your rules...if someone you thought was a friend abuses that relationship, ya gotta be open and let 'em know right off. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,381 #34 February 21, 2009 Quote I mention things like please don't touch the guns, parachutes or motorcycles without me being there... What about the whips, chains, hoists, racks, swings, gags, and leather harnesses?"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #35 February 21, 2009 Quote Quote I mention things like please don't touch the guns, parachutes or motorcycles without me being there... What about the whips, chains, hoists, racks, swings, gags, and leather harnesses? Available for use to all guests, cleaning deposit required. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #36 February 21, 2009 What about the whips, chains, hoists, racks, swings, gags, and leather harnesses? Available for use to all guests, cleaning deposit required. Yes - cleanliness is next to godliness "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #37 February 21, 2009 Quote What about the whips, chains, hoists, racks, swings, gags, and leather harnesses? Available for use to all guests, cleaning deposit required. Yes - cleanliness is next to godliness Yup...nothin' worse than Butt Plug Cling-Ons! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryan_d_sucks 0 #38 February 21, 2009 Quote Thank fuck i aint in NZ. By 'Partner' I mean defacto/girlfriend Anyway, it is done. She came downstairs just after i replied to a few posts and said to me.... "Do you think when i am still asleep, that you might be able to make sure you lift your feet when you walk past my bedroom door"..... Holy fuck did shit hit the fan. It was like an explosion. The girl is packing now. ( She got out of bed at 1:30pm) Hahahahaha! She sounds like a real leech. I absolutely hate people like that, and it seems like in college I have met hundreds of them. Whats your lady think of all that? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caress 0 #39 February 21, 2009 Make sure you get her address and send her a bill for the time past 2 weeks that she was there and your food-What a horrible little troll, I dont care how beautiful anyone thinks she is, inside, she is a mooch, arrogant and presumptuous.-Caress I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Radiance 0 #40 February 21, 2009 I don't understand not saying something before it got to this point. It seems like it would have been much less destructive to the relationship to sit down and talk calmly when it first became a problem than to spend three months fuming silently. I believe it's possible to be direct without necessarily being confrontational, but I think it has to happen sooner rather than later when there is an issue. After three months of stewing, everyone wound up suffering in this case. Hopefully things work out anyway.We should not let our fears hold us back from pursuing our hopes. -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #41 February 21, 2009 QuoteI don't understand not saying something before it got to this point. It seems like it would have been much less destructive to the relationship to sit down and talk calmly when it first became a problem than to spend three months fuming silently. I can *totally* understand... I'm a very direct person, and I've told my stupid house-mate innumerable times about all the inconsiderate behaviour she should stop.. The trouble is she doesn't stop. And it actually isn't easy telling someone to get out - even if it's your own place. I'm sure he did tell her to leave, and I'm sure she chose not to listen.."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
likestojump 3 #42 February 21, 2009 I tell people to get the fuck out of my house if they ignore my request to take off their street shoes. Or if they decide it's ok to smoke in the garage "because it's too cold outside". Does that make me a little less tolerant than you ? :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #43 February 21, 2009 QuoteI tell people to get the fuck out of my house if they ignore my request to take off their street shoes. Or if they decide it's ok to smoke in the garage "because it's too cold outside". Does that make me a little less tolerant than you ? :) [Stands up, pauses solemnly, and says:] "My name is Nataly and I'm a push-over"..."There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,381 #44 February 21, 2009 Quote [Stands up, pauses solemnly, and says:] "My name is Nataly and I'm a push-over"... So how you doin'?"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #45 February 21, 2009 Quote3 fucking months. What a doormat you let yourself be. You need a dominatrix; maybe if you pay for it you'll see it as something of value. Please visit the US. I intend to borrow some rigs from you. Of course, I won't return them. But I know you won't do anything about it. Bit of a difference when it is a friend of 5 years and someone like you who has pre meditated intentions to rip us off. Cheers for letting us know you are a thief with bad intentions. Even to say that is the way you think and that you would be willing to take advantage of anyone you can says alot about you. Great character you have .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #46 February 21, 2009 QuoteI don't understand not saying something before it got to this point. It seems like it would have been much less destructive to the relationship to sit down and talk calmly when it first became a problem than to spend three months fuming silently. I believe it's possible to be direct without necessarily being confrontational, but I think it has to happen sooner rather than later when there is an issue. After three months of stewing, everyone wound up suffering in this case. Hopefully things work out anyway. Of course I said things before it got to this point. Just things never changed and that is why it got to this point. First it was the christmas break, then it was she got a job, but that job then finished for two weeks after only three weeks of on and off work, now it got to this point. .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy9o8 0 #47 February 21, 2009 QuoteQuote3 fucking months. What a doormat you let yourself be. You need a dominatrix; maybe if you pay for it you'll see it as something of value. Please visit the US. I intend to borrow some rigs from you. Of course, I won't return them. But I know you won't do anything about it. Bit of a difference when it is a friend of 5 years and you. I take it the relationship is something like this: Just friends I'd like a new Storm with Dacron lines in a Vector 3, please. And make it snappy. Edit (to follow your edit): Oh, and work on those anger issues of yours. Transference of anger (i.e., shooting the messenger) is not healthy. This is tough love. Someday you'll thank me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #48 February 22, 2009 QuoteQuoteI tell people to get the fuck out of my house if they ignore my request to take off their street shoes. Or if they decide it's ok to smoke in the garage "because it's too cold outside". Does that make me a little less tolerant than you ? :) [Stands up, pauses solemnly, and says:] "My name is Nataly and I'm a push-over"... Actually her name is Natalie and she is homeless. .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Radiance 0 #49 February 22, 2009 QuoteQuoteI don't understand not saying something before it got to this point. It seems like it would have been much less destructive to the relationship to sit down and talk calmly when it first became a problem than to spend three months fuming silently. I believe it's possible to be direct without necessarily being confrontational, but I think it has to happen sooner rather than later when there is an issue. After three months of stewing, everyone wound up suffering in this case. Hopefully things work out anyway. Of course I said things before it got to this point. Just things never changed and that is why it got to this point. First it was the christmas break, then it was she got a job, but that job then finished for two weeks after only three weeks of on and off work, now it got to this point. Oh. Well, from your initial post, it sounded to me like you'd never said anything because you didn't want to risk adversely affecting the friendship between your partner and her friend.We should not let our fears hold us back from pursuing our hopes. -- John Fitzgerald Kennedy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #50 February 22, 2009 No, I said plenty to her. My partner did as well. Shoving her out into the street without any money or anywhere to go was what I was worried about. After all she is a human being and she was there for us in past situations when we had trouble in the UK. Just the last two weeks I realised that it had all gone too far and nothing was going to change anytime soon. .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
