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Nataly

Is it different when it's your kids??

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A whole thread full of sage advice, and yet no mention of a good old fashioned ass whuppin'. You people are leaving out an important part of early childhood development. Give 'em something to cry about, & they'll straighten up pretty quick.



Spankings are not the answer. There are times when it is called for but if you teach them how to behave in public and at home there usually isn't a reason you need to spank.
TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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When they get older and try to use temper tantrums as a control mechanism, your responses will change.



So, at what age does this occur ? My wife of 10 months has custody of her 2-yr-old granddaughter, and her whining/crying is the only thing we argue about. I never had kids, but it seems her actions are to get her way. My wife raised 2 kids, and her argument is the same as yours -- that she's trying to tell us something.

She already has a vocabulary of about 30 words.....I thinks she's acting spoiled. My wife is of the opinion that since I never had kids, I don't know shit from shinola. :)

Don


Simple tip: If it's after you've told them "no", it's a temper tantrum - respond accordingly.
Mike
I love you, Shannon and Jim.
POPS 9708 , SCR 14706

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A whole thread full of sage advice, and yet no mention of a good old fashioned ass whuppin'. You people are leaving out an important part of early childhood development. Give 'em something to cry about, & they'll straighten up pretty quick.



Well, now we've moved from a non-parental perception to advice on child-rearing, where this thread was destined to go, anyway, I suppose :S

To me, there's a difference between infant screaming and toddler screaming, and I do not believe in striking either life-form. For infant screaming, I recommend the following video:

The Happiest Baby on the Block

Premise - babies, in the first year of life, when they are stressed, need to feel secure, just like they are back in the womb. Simulate those conditions, and most times, baby will stop screaming/crying.

For toddlers, I recommend the following video:

The Happiest Toddler on the Block

Premise - toddlers, in the second to fourth year of life, when they are stressed, need to feel empathy for their emotions first, then they can be reasoned with. Echo back their own emotions, and they know that you are feeling empathetic. After that, you can reason with them.

By applying some reason and child psychology, you can avoid acting like a bully to your own children. It does work.
Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD

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A whole thread full of sage advice, and yet no mention of a good old fashioned ass whuppin'. You people are leaving out an important part of early childhood development. Give 'em something to cry about, & they'll straighten up pretty quick.



Teach children control of self as a virtue, and they'll carry that lesson through life, and pass it on to their kids. Teach children violence toward the weaker as a virtue, and they'll carry that lesson through life, and pass it on to their kids.

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A whole thread full of sage advice, and yet no mention of a good old fashioned ass whuppin'. You people are leaving out an important part of early childhood development. Give 'em something to cry about, & they'll straighten up pretty quick.



Teach children control of self as a virtue, and they'll carry that lesson through life, and pass it on to their kids. Teach children violence toward the weaker as a virtue, and they'll carry that lesson through life, and pass it on to their kids.




+1 Child abuse is not a +ve educational tool.

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

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.....and the wussification of the next generation continues... good luck with the brats...



Not wussification!

Children should not live in fear of getting beat because they make a mistake or they have not learned to communicate properly. Hell, most adults still have not figured out proper communication skills at 30. Should they get beaten for being dumb asses?:S
TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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Its pretty easy to make your point when you jump from dicipline / spanking to BEATING. Raise 'em how ever you want, let 'em learn about consequences in their teens, when the pay-off isnt a red ass, but rather a pregnant girlfriend or death by automobile. Since you are of the party of tolerance... try to tolerate my opinion without arguing with the Internet. Its merely an observation by someone who has worked with kids from many situations.

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.....and the wussification of the next generation continues... good luck with the brats...



Oh at my age, I think not ...

But if you think that beating kids is a good idea, have at it but remember, they don't stay small for ever and may come looking for revenge later.

(.)Y(.)
Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome

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when the pay-off isnt a red ass, but rather a pregnant girlfriend or death by automobile.



You imply that, as a general rule, the choice is either corporal punishment, or a lack of adequate discipline. And that's completely full of shit.

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Its pretty easy to make your point when you jump from dicipline / spanking to BEATING. Raise 'em how ever you want, let 'em learn about consequences in their teens, when the pay-off isnt a red ass, but rather a pregnant girlfriend or death by automobile. Since you are of the party of tolerance... try to tolerate my opinion without arguing with the Internet. Its merely an observation by someone who has worked with kids from many situations.



I am not going to get all SC on your ass in here. But just because you have worked with children does not make you a expert of the 24hr care that is takes to raise them.
TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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Never claimed to be an expert, I said 'observation'. Funny how some folks can only argue a point by changing the language of the counterpoint ahead of time. Now, leave me alone.




Funny how people will make a few post here and there to cause problems with others for no reason. If you wanted to be left alone then you should not have made a post like you did. Again, I am free to reply back to whom ever and that is what I did.

Stop replying to this thread if you want to be left alone.:S
TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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when the pay-off isnt a red ass, but rather a pregnant girlfriend or death by automobile.



You imply that, as a general rule, the choice is either corporal punishment, or a lack of adequate discipline. And that's completely full of shit.



And the detractors imply that corporal punishment equals abuse, which is equally bullshit.

NB: Corporal punishment = a swat on the behind, not a black-and-blue beating.
Mike
I love you, Shannon and Jim.
POPS 9708 , SCR 14706

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.....and the wussification of the next generation continues... good luck with the brats...



Not wussification!

Children should not live in fear of getting beat because they make a mistake or they have not learned to communicate properly. Hell, most adults still have not figured out proper communication skills at 30. Should they get beaten for being dumb asses?:S


Who said anything about beating a kid?:S Just cause you dont like how others rase there kid's dosent mean you need to twist word's to get your point across.
Nothing opens like a Deere!

You ignorant fool! Checks are for workers!

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.....and the wussification of the next generation continues... good luck with the brats...



Not wussification!

Children should not live in fear of getting beat because they make a mistake or they have not learned to communicate properly. Hell, most adults still have not figured out proper communication skills at 30. Should they get beaten for being dumb asses?:S


Who said anything about beating a kid?:S Just cause you dont like how others rase there kid's dosent mean you need to twist word's to get your point across.


You apparently missed this post:[B]A whole thread full of sage advice, and yet no mention of a good old fashioned ass whuppin'. You people are leaving out an important part of early childhood development. Give 'em something to cry about, & they'll straighten up pretty quick[/B]

When I hear ass whuppin, give then somthing to cry about that that'll straighten them up quickly....

To me that is a beating.:S

So don't jump up my ass because another poster phrased something that he wants us to read as beatings..

Do I think children should be spanked, as a last resort, yes.

Have I spanked my child, yes

Get to the root of the problem and take the time that is need to correct it so it doesn't continue.

Unlike most parents. I had to earn my right to be a parent by hours of training. I went thru- many hrs of training to qualify to give a child an environment he would feel safe in. You and the fixfly have no idea what it is like to live in a state of fear as a child who gets so called "ass whuppinS" or "given something to cry about."

Why don't you think before you post or just go back to SC ....:S
TPM Sister#130ONTIG#1
I love vodka.I love vodka cause it rhymes with Tuaca~LisaH
You having a clean thought is like billyvance having a clean post.iluvtofly

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It's COMPLETELY different. Other people's screaming or crying kids drive me nuts, especially if it's one of those kids who throw tantrums all the time.

I can tolerate it very well with my own kid.

That's why judging how you would be with or tolerate children by using somenoe else's kid is NOT a good idea or way to know.

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You have experienced the phenomenon known as "the reason for birth control, live and in person".

Or "Birth control, on the hoof".

It takes a village to raise a child. If I am in a public area, or resturant, where children are behaving inappropriately, I'll ask the parents nicely to control their kid(s). If the parents blow me off, I'll yell at the kids myself. It never fails to get the parents off their lazy butts and start dealing with their satan spawn. The kids usually take it well. They know they shouldn' tbe acting up and want to be told to stop. The mouthy parents get the "It takes more training and testing to get a drivers license than to have a kid. Put some effort into learning to be a parent. From what I can see, you have a lot to learn." speech. It helps to be 6' tall and 200 plus lbs.

I like kids, the well behaved ones, quite a bit.

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Go get 'em, Deedy :)
Wendy P.
(former child abuse investigator)

There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

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It's COMPLETELY different. Other people's screaming or crying kids drive me nuts, especially if it's one of those kids who throw tantrums all the time.

I can tolerate it very well with my own kid.

That's why judging how you would be with or tolerate children by using somenoe else's kid is NOT a good idea or way to know.




Fiew!! Well, that's reassuring.. But yeah, sometimes I think I must not be normal, as a woman, for not liking kids.. Like it's unnatural somehow. I used to think that just meant I didn't want kids. But when I inexplicably started wanting children of my own I was really surprised that I wasn't any less annoyed with the little buggers!!!

Anyway.. It's not like I'll be having any kids any time soon. Was just thinking about it because of the screecher upstairs. That baby must be sick or something - it just can't be normal to scream soooo much??! Oh well, how would I know what's a "normal" amount of ear-piercing shrieking anyway?!!! :S:ph34r::P
"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

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When I hear ass whuppin, give then somthing to cry about that that'll straighten them up quickly....

To me that is a beating.:S


Sounds like you're having problems with terminology.

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You and the fixfly have no idea what it is like to live in a state of fear as a child who gets so called "ass whuppinS" or "given something to cry about."


Assumptions can get you in trouble...maybe even a "spanking".

Did you grow up in fear?
Why?
-getting whupped for no apparent reason?
-getting whupped when you screwed up?

Knowing you're gonna get whupped if you cross the line is quite different than getting it for no apparent reason.

BTW..."wussification" is a great word!

"Waaaaa, Waaaaa! Coach called me a wuss, Mama."
(There's a true story about this.)
My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

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