women who have sugar-daddies..

[airtwardo 6]

He spent 99% of the evening bragging. It wasn't impressive - it was annoying.

I love the conversations that go-

Well enough about me, lets talk about you. . . . what do YOU think is great about me?????

~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

[Remster 24]

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I'll earn my own spending money, thanks.

Exactly. As men, we dont all want a girl to shower with money and gifts.

Ideally, she should know how, and be able to buy all the ingredients to make our sammiches herself.

Remster

[squirrelgirl 0]

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When I went to college, it was a big slap in my face how many women I met who were truly there only to meet a future doctor or lawyer.

We called it the MRS degree, every girl looking to major in fashion and become a missus.

[fossg 0]

I don't envy you Nataly. This dating stuff seems awfly complicated

[bfilarsky 0]

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He spent 99% of the evening bragging. It wasn't impressive - it was annoying.

I love the conversations that go-

Well enough about me, lets talk about you. . . . what do YOU think is great about me?????

Or a date with a pilot.... You know its halfway over when he says, "Enough about me, let's talk about my airplane."

[Bolas 5]

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He spent 99% of the evening bragging. It wasn't impressive - it was annoying.

I love the conversations that go-

Well enough about me, lets talk about you. . . . what do YOU think is great about me?????

Or a date with a pilot.... You know its halfway over when he says, "Enough about me, let's talk about my airplane."

Ah. A confused soul that talk of only of women around planes and only of planes around women.

Stupidity if left untreated is self-correcting
If ya can't be good, look good, if that fails, make 'em laugh.

[Slappie 9]

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I'll earn my own spending money, thanks.

Exactly. As men, we dont all want a girl to shower with money and gifts.

Ideally, she should know how, and be able to buy all the ingredients to make our sammiches herself.

Remitard, we don't agree much. But you speak with wisdom on this post. I have to agree with you on this one.

"Find out just what any people will quietly submit to and you have found out the exact measure of injustice and wrong which will be imposed upon them."

[popsjumper 2]

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..I kind of felt like if I hadn't explicitly TOLD him there would be no monkey business, he would have been expecting some in exchange for all the dosh he just parted with..

Welllll, DUH! You don't have much experience with men, do you.


Oh...and BTW...is there a Sugar Daddy sign-up sheet somewhere?


No wait...I'm serious!

My reality and yours are quite different.
I think we're all Bozos on this bus.
Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239

[crustySCSA69 0]

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Ok.. So I own up to having put my details online for a dating website in January.. By February, I concluded that as suspected, the types of people on there just weren't my cup of tea, so I took down my profile.

One guy who sent me a message, however, has kept persisting we meet, and after 9 months of this, I went out with him last night.

I was absolutely clear he should have no expectations other than I would pay half the bill and owe him nothing in exchange.. He took me to an eye-poppingly expensive restaurant, and I told him I only could afford something in the region of £30-£40, so we should go somewhere else. He thought this was "cute" and ordered for me, not giving me much of a choice and told me not to worry about it.

But I'm an accountant, and I quickly tallied the bill, and it was close to £300.. Holy fucking shit.

It made me uncomfortable. Maybe he was expecting me to be impressed, but I just found it a bit vulgar. And I kind of felt like if I hadn't explicitly TOLD him there would be no monkey business, he would have been expecting some in exchange for all the dosh he just parted with..

I just don't understand why this would impress a girl, or how a girl could lower her standards in a man because he spent money on her.

*YUK*.

I'll meet you after 9 days ..
I'll have NO expectations..
We'll go to MacDonalds, 10 bucks max, you can pay and I'll worry about it, and won't think it's cute ...
I won't expect you to be impressed ...
Monkey business will never enter my mind ..
I sure hope you don't lower your standards for me

AND I'LL STILL BE EXACTLY LIKE THAT GUY

[Lucky... 0]

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I once went to a bar and met a butcher...he offered me discounts on his meat for a date.

I'm on a diet and no red meat for me....bahhahahah

I think that was a pick-up line.

[Lucky... 0]

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Ewww.. But then not every guy I've liked has been physically attractive - I just have a soft-spot for funny, charismatic guys.. So I can understand a "beautiful" person with someone "ugly".. I just can't understand someone "dating" for money.

The really ironic thing is that the guy from last night isn't that old (10 years older than me, which isn't necessarily a problem).. And he wasn't ugly.. So all this showiness was really unnecessary. I reckon he just doesn't have good social skills and tries to compensate with money and stuff..

Who knows.. Maybe it works on some people. I've never had much money, but I've never really found that to be a problem - if I want something, I just work hard and save up for it. I'm suspicious of "free" stuff - I don't think anything is free in life. Well.. Maybe love.

But that's a whole different topic..

Yea, if he had "game" he could use his cash as a real benefit. He would need to establish a basis for being desireable, then the cash is a big bonus, but never the primary basis for being with someone. It might work with some chicks early on, but even the real ho-bags go tired of it and sometimes find a way to leave with some of it.

I think it's classy that you weren't drawn to it, I'm sure a lot of girls feel euphoric at the thought of an $800 meal and all the notariety that goes with it. I guess he'll never date a skydiver again

[Nataly 38]

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I'll meet you after 9 days ..
I'll have NO expectations..
We'll go to MacDonalds, 10 bucks max, you can pay and I'll worry about it, and won't think it's cute ...
I won't expect you to be impressed ...
Monkey business will never enter my mind ..
I sure hope you don't lower your standards for me

AND I'LL STILL BE EXACTLY LIKE THAT GUY

Sounds to me like the perfect date!! In what way would you be like that guy??

By the way, the first place my ex took me was McDonalds & I paid!! At the time, he was jobless, broke, and temporarily living with his parents on the other side of the ocean from me.. But you know what? He was the funniest, most charismatic, kindest person I've ever met. He totally swept me off my feet and never spent a penny on me. We ended up being together for 5 years and I still love him to pieces. (Of course, it didn't hurt that he's sexy as hell and has a British accent!! )

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[wayneflorida 0]

I'm curious as to his attitude toward your skydiving.
If it was brought up.

[nerdgirl 0]

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When I went to college, it was a big slap in my face how many women I met who were truly there only to meet a future doctor or lawyer.

We called it the MRS degree, every girl looking to major in fashion and become a missus.

A few years back I remember saying to someone a couple generations older from my church that I was going to a “MRS national meeting.” The person replied something to the extent that “didn’t realize they had official meetings.” The confused look on my face clearly communicated that I didn’t get the joke … it seriously didn’t occur to me that college =’s getting a husband. MRS.org

While I’m a contemporary of [PLXpert], I don’t know a single woman personally who went to college to get her “MRS” degree … don’t doubt they’re out there … just not sure where … which may reflect more on me than anything else.

The donors to one private university and the citizens of one State school spent/invested a lot of money in me while I was getting my degrees. While there was no formal or even any tacit agreement, I feel that I have an obligation (owned completely as my own feeling/thinking) to make ‘good’ on that investment in me.

... Altho’ curiously (to me at least (“diploma” is printed on it) that I have framed & hanging in my office is from the Army Chem School, but I wouldn’t have gotten the opportunity to get that one if I didn’t have the other degrees and a great mentor.

/Marg

Act as if everything you do matters, while laughing at yourself for thinking anything you do matters.
Tibetan Buddhist saying

[JohnMitchell 14]

I would never be attracted to a woman who was impressed by the expensive restaurant. My wife and I have much simpler tastes and values. Any woman who needs the red carpet treatment is too high maintenance for me.

If the guy was smart, he should have gone low key, and let you gradually discover his wonderfulness. You should ask him if all the bragging ever works.

[happythoughts 0]

Most online sites have "the button". It is a set of radio buttons that you select to define your date.
One of those buttons is the salary range.
So, apparently, having a certain income range is important
to a lot of people.

People want the best possible person for a long term relationship.
Usually, a good income is part of an overall picture.
- Probably well educated.
- Financial security for the person and their entire family.
- The best education, care, and living environment for the possible future kids.

There are many valid reasons for clicking the button at a certain level.

Every normal person desires to date someone who
treats them well. For wealthy people,
there is a long line of people who will do that, so their
expectations are higher.

[Lucky... 0]

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I'll meet you after 9 days ..
I'll have NO expectations..
We'll go to MacDonalds, 10 bucks max, you can pay and I'll worry about it, and won't think it's cute ...
I won't expect you to be impressed ...
Monkey business will never enter my mind ..
I sure hope you don't lower your standards for me

AND I'LL STILL BE EXACTLY LIKE THAT GUY

Sounds to me like the perfect date!! In what way would you be like that guy??

By the way, the first place my ex took me was McDonalds & I paid!! At the time, he was jobless, broke, and temporarily living with his parents on the other side of the ocean from me.. )

Oh my God, you've just described me to a T; we're soulmates

[Nataly 38]

A couple of women have already said that money can be a really nice bonus, but it shouldn't be the basis for a relationship.

Of *course* a man with money is inherently appealing.. But for me, it's not because he *has* money, it's more to do with the fact that he is hard-working, successful, ambitious and charismatic. If he's rich because he's all of the above, it's very sexy - it's a sign that he's a good provider. And if it's ever going to work, he would have to also be emotionally dependable and giving as well. In the above scenario, money is the bonus that comes from all the qualities that make a great partner - it's a massive turn on.

If, on the other hand, money was inherited or it's all he's interested in, or it's due to lying, cheating, dishonesty, etc., it's NOT appealing. ESPECIALLY if money is the only thing he has to snare women in. If the man has no charisma or personality to speak of, money is NOT attractive in the slightest.

Let's turn this on it's head for a moment.. You're a guy, and you meet this girl with an AMAZING personality.. Isn't it a GREAT bonus if she's also drop-dead gorgeous??

Same with men who have money.. It *is* a bonus, but I wouldn't go out with a jerk just because he spent loads of money on me.

"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

[happythoughts 0]

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Let's turn this on it's head for a moment.. You're a guy, and you meet this girl with an AMAZING personality.. Isn't it a GREAT bonus if she's also drop-dead gorgeous??

Same with men who have money.. It *is* a bonus, but I wouldn't go out with a jerk just because he spent loads of money on me.

There are beautiful women who do not treat men well
because they don't have to. There are 50 men who ask
them out. Regardless of treatment, 10 will return.
The expectation of the women is the best treatment.
Their online dating-site picture is their equivalent of the salary-range-button.

For rich men, there is a line of women out there who
want to date them, regardless of treatment.

For either sex, there is an allure to getting your way all the time. If I had a way to choose a life free of
conflict, I would certainly do that.

People who don't want to participate, do not have to.
They just have to date other rich/beautiful people.

looks + personality + money = date
People should place stress on the column that is the most
important in their life.
What makes them happy is their choice.

[MiataMan 0]

I would say this date was doomed from the beginning. Both people had different expectations from the beginning to the end.

However, I take exception to the it being automatically rude if someone orders for the other. If the date was wholly devised by one party it should/could be that person who chooses the meal not just where to eat. I equate it to someone making dinner for another. I would find it extremely rude if I made dinner for a lady and she proceeded to put more cheese, salt, pepper, salsa, pasta sauce, steak sauce, or any other ingredient on top of a meal I had made and planned.

I also think that the bank account of someone should not be a factor in dating. I parallel the Einstein quote, "Try not to be a man of success, but rather become a man of value." Look past the outer trappings of a person to look for their real value.

A man without a mustache is like a hamburger without a bun, Un-American.

[skybytch 259]

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I would find it extremely rude if I made dinner for a lady and she proceeded to put more cheese, salt, pepper, salsa, pasta sauce, steak sauce, or any other ingredient on top of a meal I had made and planned.

Seriously? Perhaps she prefers more pepper in her food than you do in yours. That makes her rude?

If that's the case, may I suggest that you never have children?

[kbordson 8]

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Einstein quote, "Try not to be a man of success, but rather become a man of value." Look past the outer trappings of a person to look for their real value.

I like that. Nice quote - and should parallel to this situation. First date - "showing off" might display "success" but not necessarily value.

[Shotgun 1]

Interesting... (Not directed at anyone in particular.)

It seems that the logical female equivalent of a man who makes a lot of money would be.... well, a woman who makes a lot of money. But it is interesting that, instead, the female equivalent of a man who makes lots of money seems to be a woman who is exceptionally beautiful.

And my first inclination was to fault this line of thinking, but actually, I think it's still pretty true to reality for now.

As for the OP, maybe the situation could have been avoided if a restaurant had been mutually agreed upon before the date?

[kbordson 8]

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I would find it extremely rude if I made dinner for a lady and she proceeded to put more cheese, salt, pepper, salsa, pasta sauce, steak sauce, or any other ingredient on top of a meal I had made and planned.

Seriously? Perhaps she prefers more pepper in her food than you do in yours. That makes her rude?

If that's the case, may I suggest that you never have children?

Two thoughts to consider here:

1. Different situations - "making a meal for someone" v. "ordering the meal for someone." One is more personal and should get a little more respect.

2. Did the person that the meal was made for actually TRY the meal as prepared and then add, or was it an automatic reflex to drown the food?

[MiataMan 0]

Yes seriously. I am not talking about a meal for sustenance but, a meal showing I know how to plan, pair, and prepare something. It is totally different type of meal from one I would make for children.

A man without a mustache is like a hamburger without a bun, Un-American.