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JACKO

How do you feel about the sober skydiver?

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Heya,
Earlier, a discussion was brought up about addictions and skydiving. I was keenly interested in the subject being that I am a recovered alcoholic. For me, skydiving has been a lifesaver. It does all the positives without the negatives (except that you still could die, but not guaranteed of it, unlike booze which guarantee's death to most folks who use a lot everyday).
My serious question is: How do you all feel about the sober guy at the DZ? The reason I ask, is that sometimes at the few DZ gatherings I've been to there is heavy drinking. Now, I don't blame this on the fact that its skydivers. I used to play softball before I was a skydiver and half the team was drunk the entire game (and it was VERY boring). At least in skydiving we HAVE to be sober while we jump, or risk being grounded or worse.
But sometimes, after the day of jumping, the people who I feel "tight" with and I sort of go our own way. They go off to drink and I might stay for an hour or so, but when their buzz hits, I roll out of there to avoid any temptation. Many people say, "Just have ONE beer man, I mean ONE beer isn't going to hurt". This is true, but I am in a risk group (alcoholics) that shouldn't risk one or two beers. Some skydivers look at me like I'm not really part of "the crowd" because I wont get tanked with them. But though I only started jumping 8 months ago, I try and make 20 jumps a month and I know that some of these lushes aren't doing half that. So who is the "true" skydiver?
I think that the alienation that non-drinkers feel, by the very nature of their not drinking, is what tends to drive alcoholics back to the sauce. I have enough perspective and life experience to realize that getting hammered with people isn't going to give me any more of a bond with anyone. I had friends I thought were blood brothers I used to party with and most vanished when they heard I caught the sober train.
Being new to the skydiving world, I wonder, is alcohol an integral and necessary part of it? I know that the ladies at the DZ are cool with me not drinking. Women just seem to understand that more. But my new guy skydiver buddies are always weirded out when I say I don't want to go hit the bars with them. I don't like the bar scene at all anymore. And no, I don't want to go have a coke and be the designated driver for a bunch of drunks. I used to be in that bunch and it almost killed me. Then I tried to be the sober guy at the bar and it almost killed me. So now I just skydive and socialize in environments that don't provide high levels of temptation. I can socialize just fine nearly anywhere, but not around a hundred drunks and not at a bar.
But, before I get anymore deeper into this sport, and before I put anymore money into it, I need to know---
Is this drinking thing a necessary part of being a real part of the skydiving community?
Jack

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Don't let the others ruin it for you Jacko. I wonder how old they are, how much of life they've really seen - not much I'd guess. This sport is way way way tooooo great to leave it to the drunks. You've just gotta find some sober people who jump. They are out there - I can take it or leave it, and having taken it a couple of times before a day's jumping I now don't bother. We've got a mixed bunch at our DZ - some drink themselves stupid, some stay at the DZ and laugh about crap for hours without the alcohol, some just go to bed (i'm not sure if they are alone though...)Stay in this for life Jacko, for your life. I really admire you for giving up the grog. I have seen the hell it can put people through. Hang in there and have the greatest fun of your life.

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Hi Jacko,
Firstly, congratulations on being able to say no.
Secondly, there is a group in the skydiving community, let's call them the "Death-Defying-Devil-Divers" who feel they're missing something if they're not living life at what they see as "Full-Throttle". So they're going to (claim) to skydive hard and then party hard! I suppose they see it as a lifestyle choice, believe me, most see it as the noisy, obnoxious group at the end of the bar.
Don't get me wrong, I've nothing against "social drinking", a beer or two at the end of the day for those who can drink AND stop. The difference between those guys and you is that you know your limits and they don't. Don't get sucked in to the "one beer" idea, stick to the company of those who can understand you (personally I'd sooner be in the company of ladies and sober than swapping heroic tales with a bunch of burping drunks).
Skydiving is intense enough - there's really no substitute for adrenaline for a buzz.
Regards,
Mike D10270.

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I rarely drink at my DZ for a couple reasons. First, I don't normally drink much or often. Second, I think it would be very irresponsible of me to drink before I drive the 98 miles back home.
I've never gotten any grief from anyone when I said no thanks to a beer. There are lots of heavy drinkers, but there are also light and non-drinkers as well. Some of the local skygods fall into the latter two categories.
Congratulations on overcoming your addiction and not giving in to temptation.

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Hey Dude,
You done good. My name is Triple F and I'm a (insert your own words here).... Good to see you are a recovering alcoholic. I for one know the terrible effects of addiction. I am addicted to adrenalin and it can be most upsetting at times. The BEER?? Not to worry, my friend. a lot of us don't drink. I never developed the taste for it. And the answer to your question is NO, you don't have to drink to skydive. Man, people are not gonna' put you down for not indulging, just like most won't do it because ya' do. It's just personal preference. And who says, by the way, that ya' have to drink to have a good time. Geez, I go to Mullins in Tenn and as old as I am, I'm always the first one up and the last one down. Many's the night I have been able to yell at the top of my lungs "wussies" cause I was the last one left to party at the fire. Welcome to the blue, little bro.
Triple F

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Hi there Teach,
Have your students learned to fart on command yet?? Tee-hee,sorry I just couldn't resist that. Was rereading this post and realized that if you have seen firsthand, the terror of the mind one goes through, then you must be a pretty compassionate person to put up with it. Good to see that you have the universe in your heart. And keep up the good work with the kids.
Triple F

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But, before I get anymore deeper into this sport, and before I put anymore money into it, I need to know---
Is this drinking thing a necessary part of being a real part of the skydiving community?


I started jumping at a small dz. One guy who started shortly after I did jumped his ass off during the day, then when we all ran for the beer fridge as the last load took off, he would pull out an ODoul's and hang out chatting with us. Like you, he usually left after a couple of hours. He had quit drinking a few years earlier and everyone on our dz respected that; I never heard anyone give him shit because he didn't drink. We did give him shit cuz he didn't want to be pied though...
No, drinking alcohol is NOT required to be a part of the skydiving community. There are a lot of jumpers just like you... and each of them has my respect and admiration for recognizing and beating their problem. Even though I often enjoy a beer or two after a day's jumping there are also many times I do a few jumps then pack it all up and go home long before the beer light is lit.
pull and flare,
lisa

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I'll say I agree with Jacko quite a bit here. My gf and I arent the hard drinkin-partying type, so we tend to miss out on the Saturday night after-jumping 'bonding' (read drinking) stuff that goes on. During the jump day we're treated like family, but after the beer light goes on, it seems everybody drifts into their little drinking cliques and we meander home. I DO feel like we're missing out on SOMETHING, i'm just not sure WHAT...lol.
But congrats to Jacko for staying sober! especially among a buncha skydivers!

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All my friends have given you such great advice already that there isn't much left for me to add. I'll just say that you've got to be true to yourself. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything... and it looks like you've already pulled yourself up after a fall. If these people think YOU must consume booze to be part of their crowd, is that really the sort of crowd you want to hang with (being a recovered alcoholic)??? Live healthy, skydive safely, but most of all, follow your own heart. Personally I drink lotsa beer - not before driving, of course, but I would never try to convince anyone else that they SHOULD drink, too. Like someone mentioned earlier, could it be that they are a bit younger, and still feel they need to be seen "partying" to appear cool?

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well done for getting sober and i'm sure you'll stay that way. personly i do drink and swing from the one or two beers in the evening chatting with mates to the get totally brain dead drunk. most people at my DZ drink but there one or two who don't. no one give's them shit for it and they hang around as much as the drinker's, in fact they say they have as much fun at the parties just from watching all the antics of the rest of us. And then reminding us about it in the morning.
remember that the skydiving comunity is wide and varied, but we are all skydivers who should support each other. those that judge would do well to remember that.

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I wonder how old they are, how much of life they've really seen - not much I'd guess

Ok, so I'm 20, but I think you would be surprised. Maybe I sould go on about having to pull my dead friend's body from under a large stack of collapsed logs or maybe you would like another one of my "not much I'd guess" stories. For *not have had seen much of life* there's quite a few on par. That is such a damn lie that because I've yet to live to the ripe old age of 30 or greater that I or anyone else for that matter *hasn't really seen life*.
Ok, sorry about the rant, I'll stop now.
AggieDave '02
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Blue Skies and Gig'em Ags!
BTHO t.u.

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That is such a damn lie that because I've yet to live to the ripe old age of 30 or greater that I or anyone else for that matter *hasn't really seen life*.

Right on, Aggie Dave. While I do think this is true in some cases, for the most part, I think that most people see and go through some of their hardest times before they ever hit 30. It is their childhood, imho, that usually is the hardest thing for adults to deal with and get over. I'm glad you're making decesions that seem to be right for you:)MUCH LOVE AND BLUE SKIES!
Carrie http://www.geocities.com/skydivegrl20/

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jacko,
there is nothing wrong wiht you being a skydiver. the fact that you dont drink doesnt make a bit of difference! I would jump/hang out wiht ya for weeks on end, and never drink a singe sip if thats what would make you most comfortable. Put my skydiving friends and liquor on the same plate and i gaurentee you, id be picking my friends first and formost! So keep on drinking, we need all the 'cool' people we can get, it only serves to make this sport better and better.
froggie

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Coming from a family of recoverers...CONGRATS on giving it up. As for the other issue of feeling alienated...
as far as I am concerned...you jump out of a plane with me, you're like me. If you don't want to drink, it doesn't mean that we still don't have something in common. I would have to say it is a bigger challenge for someone to give up an addiction and allow themselves to be surrounded with their nemisis than to strap on a parachute.
So, you are right, keep up the jumping and avoid the "skygods" and their bullshit reasoning on how to ENJOY the sport to its fullest. If you're alive tomorrow, you enjoyed it plenty.
Good on ya!

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man what dz r u jumping at from my experiencs and reading the other posts there is a hell of alot of dz that dont care if you drink or not, plus a few dzo that will welcome it :-)u r obviously unhappy there so maybe u could move dz.
i dont drink beer which is the main thing at my dz but i do drink liquor but i have never seen any1 get dissed cause they dont drink i think your "mates" r just a load of wankers

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I have never gotten any grief from anyone about my choice not to drink. While they drink beer and whatever around the bonfire after the plane lands I'll drink Coke or Mountain Dew and no one thinks I'm not cool for not drinking. I was at Mike Mullins's place in Coolidge over the holidays and was offered alcohol, but when I said no thanks they were cool about it. Anyway, you don't need to drink to be a skydiver. Skydiving is about jumping from planes, not drinking alcohol. Some people like to drink others don't it's all personal preference and nobody should ever give another person grief over making a good decision like not to drink. Just my personal opinion.
Blue Skies,
Adam

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Thanks for all the supportive comments I've recieved. I'm glad to see there are skydivers out there who understand the difficulties of being a sober skydiver.
I'll stay skydiving and try and seek out you individuals who will limit your judgements to how I skydive and not to the fact that I don't drink anymore.
Jack

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AggieDave,
To attack some one here just because you don't like something they have said is wrong. That post was not directed to or at you. So before this turns into that "other" thread, be a man and take the bit about the "lie" to heart. No one wants to be attacked here. And that was some pretty harsh wording. I know cause I've been there.
Triple F

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Jacko,
Nothing wrong about not drinking. There are a lot of people that choose not to for one reason or another; again, it's personal. Skydiving in general, attracts people from all walks of life. We do not show any bias. As long as you are a skydiver and like to have fun you are always welcome. That's what I like about the people at the dz. No one will ever discourage you from a choice, especially one that may save your life. Hell, I'm a non-smoker and find that everyone on my rw jump is smoking during the debrief. No, I don't feel left out. It is, however, my choice to be around smoke (just not inhale it, to quote the famous.) :D Anyway, I would hope that people would be non-judgemental for what some do, or not do, what they do for work, the way they look, or even what kind of car the drive. It's all about fun!

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My uncle (not a skydiver) lived worked in a pub in an area of the city with a lot of pubs. It was really the social hub of the area. He did develop a drinking problem, but he recovered, and he was still able to hang out with his friends in the social environment he loved so well. His solution? He would still hang out with his buddies, but he'd be drinking non-alcoholic beer. You still get to have the flavor, and you're standing there with a bottle of beer in your hand so people don't keep bugging you & asking why aren't you drinking.

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Hey, Jacko, there's not a thing wrong with being a sober skydiver! You're not alone out there, either. Some people are single parents that have their children with them. Some are people whose bodies can't tolerate alcohol, or its' effects. Doesn't matter. You're here to have a great time with your friends/preferred families- nobody should care what you drink, only that you're there to share the good times with them.... :D YOU'RE the only one you have to please... Blue Skies!

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First, like everyone else here, I congratulate you on beating your addiction.
I can't imagine anyone giving you grief over choosing not to drink. They may rib you for not hanging out after hours, but certainly not for staying sober. I certainly wouldn't. If you're at a DZ where they do, find another DZ because those folks aren't worth hanging out with. Plus, if they use peer pressure to do that, what other things might they try to goad you into doing (like doing jumps you're not comfortable doing)? It's not worth it.
But then again, I don't drink much anyway. Usually messes up my stomach I a big way so it's just not worth it anymore. I bring beer to the DZ when I owe, but I'll let everyone else drink it and just have Diet Cokes myself.
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Blue Skies!
Zennie

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