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Southern_Man

Post-nuptial shut-off

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Married/divorced guys and girls: how long after the ceremony did it take for your wives/husbands to start shutting you off?

If you want to post but don't want it associated with your user name (i.e. you are still married) then you can PM me and I will post it for you.
"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"

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For me, it was somewhere between year two and three.

At one point, I think about ten years in, I went to the doctor for a routine physical. The doctor asked me if I had any "erectile dysfunction". I thought to myself, "Hell yeah, I've got a boner you could cut glass with and nowhere to put it, 'cause I'm married".
"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"

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What do you mean by "Shutting you off"?



sexually, sorry, I thought that was obvious.



Seriously, that was one obvious meaning. You might have also meant "shutting you off" as in, forcing you to suppress your natural personality and values as though only the spouse's way of thinking and acting were valid.

I've been married for over 25 years, as have most of my age-contemporaries with whom I have shared personal discussions over the years. Now that I'm in my 50s, I've come to the conclusion that, in most mariages, most of the time a married couple's sex life goes cold (which doesn't always happen), each spouse tends to earnestly believe it's mostly the other spouse's fault.

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets


Dude, pregnant people can have sex too :P

But triplets? Thats not even funny!

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets


Dude, pregnant people can have sex too :P

But triplets? Thats not even funny!


I know pregnant people can have sex, but with that many babies floating around in you, I seriously doubt thats going to happen.:P

Statistics don't lie... we've done the math. Remember?
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets


Dude, pregnant people can have sex too :P

But triplets? Thats not even funny!


I know pregnant people can have sex, but with that many babies floating around in you, I seriously doubt thats going to happen.:P

Statistics don't lie... we've done the math. Remember?


Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...


Well considering Ive seen my GYN about 27 times in the last three weeks, Im pretty sure I would know if Im preggers by now... Gimme two weeks and I'll let you know if we've got a baby Stalder on the way.

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets


Dude, pregnant people can have sex too :P

But triplets? Thats not even funny!


Hey, it's okay, up to a point. You stop when the baby starts getting pissed at being poked repeatedly by some dickhead and roundhouse kicks it. :D
"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban

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Get one of those water cooler bottles.

During the first two years, every time you have sex, put a quarter in the bottle.

After that, every time you have sex, take a quarter out.

At a certain point, you realize that you'll never see the
bottom of that jug, so take the remaining quarters out
and go have a few drinks.



Ok, so I dont like the part about never seeing the end of the jug, but thats a pretty neat idea. A quarter for every time you have sex :)


You're getting knocked up on your wedding night, so it wont matter too much.


With triplets


Dude, pregnant people can have sex too :P

But triplets? Thats not even funny!


Hey, it's okay, up to a point. You stop when the baby starts getting pissed at being poked repeatedly by some dickhead and roundhouse kicks it. :D


:D:D thats a funny image.

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...


Well considering Ive seen my GYN about 27 times in the last three weeks, Im pretty sure I would know if Im preggers by now... Gimme two weeks and I'll let you know if we've got a baby Stalder on the way.


Princess is letting you keep your name?:D:D:D
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...


Well considering Ive seen my GYN about 27 times in the last three weeks, Im pretty sure I would know if Im preggers by now... Gimme two weeks and I'll let you know if we've got a baby Stalder on the way.


Princess is letting you keep your name?:D:D:D


Well... no... but itll be a stalder baby until we set a damn date. Jeez louise this wedding crap is absolutely ridiculous. HOW in the world to ladies plan a weddding for 1-3 years?!! I mean really, I would like to know....

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...


Well considering Ive seen my GYN about 27 times in the last three weeks, Im pretty sure I would know if Im preggers by now... Gimme two weeks and I'll let you know if we've got a baby Stalder on the way.


Princess is letting you keep your name?:D:D:D


Well... no... but itll be a stalder baby until we set a damn date. Jeez louise this wedding crap is absolutely ridiculous. HOW in the world to ladies plan a weddding for 1-3 years?!! I mean really, I would like to know....


Yall need to have a good old fashion Alabama wedding...

Requires a couple dozen cases of PBR or Budweiser, a shotgun (which, I believe yall already have) and a drunk hillbilly named bubba to do the ceremony.
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Less than a month after we were married my husband told me he was no longer attracted to me. That was the beginning of the end.



Did he start batting for the other team?

Or did he just go blind?
I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

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Less than a month after we were married my husband told me he was no longer attracted to me. That was the beginning of the end.



Did he start batting for the other team?

Or did he just go blind?



I never understand that... some HOT chicks out there got husbands that completely just ignore them.

The worst ones are the guys that play WoW... I know of women who would get naked and go sit on their husbands lap, or start giving him head, only for him to tell her to stop so he can play.

I don't see it... If a chick gets on my lap naked, I don't remember what my computer looks like.
"I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly
DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890
I'm an asshole, and I approve this message

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Oh the math is out the window.... I lost count... Gotta be getting close tho :$:D



If you aren't already, that is...


Well considering Ive seen my GYN about 27 times in the last three weeks, Im pretty sure I would know if Im preggers by now... Gimme two weeks and I'll let you know if we've got a baby Stalder on the way.


Princess is letting you keep your name?:D:D:D


Well... no... but itll be a stalder baby until we set a damn date. Jeez louise this wedding crap is absolutely ridiculous. HOW in the world to ladies plan a weddding for 1-3 years?!! I mean really, I would like to know....


Yall need to have a good old fashion Alabama wedding...

Requires a couple dozen cases of PBR or Budweiser, a shotgun (which, I believe yall already have) and a drunk hillbilly named bubba to do the ceremony.


And if they are worried about a mini princess, there may well be a few shotguns present as well.B|
I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

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