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Heatmiser

Have you ever been unfaithful?

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That's just it. I don't think they had any notion of us being exclusive. I just felt guilty about seeing two women at once.



I wish that would rub off on someone I know. :D:D:D


Pilots don't feel guilt. :P



How are they with PAIN?! :ph34r:










~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~

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Dispute it, argue it, say whatever you want but it is the truth. It doesnt say anything about the person, its just simply how we were created, a sex drive and the desire to spread our seed is a very very strong attribute of the male species.
...........
All men will know what I am talking about, those that say I am full of shit, are those that either dont have the opportunities to cheat or are simply filling their wives or girlfriends heads with bullshit because thats what the wives and girlfriends want to hear.



I certainly don't disagree with you that we (men) have to drives and desires, but I disagree strongly with your presumption that it is an excuse to act on those impulses and use that reasoning to avoid the consequences. We have a lot of desires inbodied in us that are certainly 'natural'. Marriage (or pairing up) has been in our species as long as written history, and it's not because it's what the lady folks want. I have those desires as a guy, but I choose not to act on them because I know the consequences of doing so outweigh the benefits. People are reasoning creatures, and DO have the ability to make decisions beyond our wired programing. That is why I believe you are wrong.
=========Shaun ==========


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That's just it. I don't think they had any notion of us being exclusive. I just felt guilty about seeing two women at once.



I wish that would rub off on someone I know. :D:D:D


Pilots don't feel guilt. :P


How are they with PAIN?! :ph34r:


I'll let ya know when I get back from vacation. ;)
Always be kinder than you feel.

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I tried dating two women at the same time once. I was a wreck for the entire week. There was no agreement or exclusivity. I just appear to be extremely monogamous. Not sure how people cheat and make it work in their minds. Whether it is just dating or engaged or married. It just doesn't click in my mind. Never have. Never will.



I've dated more than one woman at once. It was not a problem for me at all. Wouldn't want to do it long term but this was early dating/getting to know each other.

If after 3 dates I'm not at least thinking about exclusivity then I stop seeing somebody. No point in my mind.

Also intimacy=exclusivity for me. I make sure I discusss that with somebody prior to being intimate with her. If she is not on the same page, or not ready, then no intimacy.

I've never cheated. Wish I could say the same about my ex-wife.
"What if there were no hypothetical questions?"

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I know I could never do it. But those I know who do...well they actually had an honest answer which went like this.
"Shah I'm 30ish, I still have an active sex drive and well my wife though we share the house work and the kid work just doesn't. We tried talking about it and well honestly this is just better. Less pressure on her and it takes the edge off of me!"
And I hate to say it, because I was dumb enough to have that "talk" with my x wife but I think these guys have it figured out and their wives seem ok with it.
Less pressure on her to be in the mood and well the guy is happy and so are the kids?
I mean sure you could do the same with really good pot but.....well.....there is that piss in the cup issue for some.
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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my wife . . . just doesn't.


I just want to be absolutely clear that my post was about long before I got married.:o Or even met Vskydiver.

Anyway, that would be tough, Shah, to have a marriage like that, but more power to the people that make it work. Are Europeans still more open to that kind of thing (affairs, mistresses, etc.) than their American cousins?

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Europe is different from the US.
For one there is no sexual harassment and thus maybe.

I don't know anyone from my old company that I worked at that cheated on their wives but of my friends outside of work I think of the 5 one never did.

As for me and my x wife. Well I hate to say it but maybe my friends who are married with something on the side have it figured out. I know I was an ass! I know I was a jerk! But then again, here I was trying to be a good husband. Paying for her evening collage classes, cleaning the house and making dinner while she was in class, taking care of all the other issues when I had days off from work and well....every other week?

I was put on a sex diet. And every time I did bring it up, and yes I was very diplomatic about it, the conversation would end with "Well if you are unhappy then divorce me!" which was the last thing in the world I wanted. But what in the end happened.

As my friends who happen to have side deals going have pointed out to me over drinks, "Shah if you had a side deal, sure it would have cost you a few dollars since having a mistress is a bit expensive, but in the long run look at it this way...your x would have eventually regained her sex drive and you would have been less of a stressed out jerk."

And even knowing that.....I still don't think I could do it. I've been cheated on by girlfriends, and well why would I inflict such pain on another person whom I love?

But maybe they are on to something. For let's be honest women are not that out of it that they can't figure out that their husbands have something on the side. A guys trip to DR....for golf...YEAH RIGHT!
Working late! REALLY!
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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John:

Sorry. No.

I have always made a point of not dating anyone who had a previous relationship with someone I knew. That avoides emotional issues. So, I've never dated anyone who was even friends with someone else. Can't say it has made anything easier, but I can't say it's made things harder.

SouthernMan:

Same here. Ex seems to have had no trouble sleeping around while married. Turns out I knew nothing about her. Or some of the other women I dated either.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

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Just get one 23 years younger than you, you'll be to tired to cheat.


I'm 33.......eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwww!!!!!!!
OK if i was say 53 ok!
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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I've never been unfaithful, however, I've been cheated on 3 times in the course of my 17yrs. marriage.

So yah....I chose to be single....happily single! :)
"Love is doing small things with great love."

Lacrosse: Legally beating men with sticks since 1492

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When I'm dead and gone and can look at the way I lived my life, I will be proud of the fact that I had never been unfaithful. I can't imagine cheating on somebody, especially the wonderful person I'm with now. I would never want to cause that type of pain on the person I chose to share my life with.

I despise cheating [:/]

And for the record: the appropriate ranking of cool modes of transportation is jet pack, hover board, transporter, Batmobile, and THEN giant ant.
D.S. #8.8

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Shah uhm I am 53, as of last sunday.


You you are good to go for those 30yo ladies!
;)
Enjoy them, but from what I can tell thus far from dating a few this year, most women in the early 30's are either looking for a father for their kids or a man to father their children. But it's all in good fun!
Just lie and tell them that due to a Yoga injury you can no longer have kids! ;)
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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Well I lucked out, she a cutie, doesn't like the thought of her own kids and makes more than me. Plus she has near 200 jumps so at least I'll have someone to laugh at me out of kindness.

Oh and for the record I have never cheated. But the X was very good at it.
Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”

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