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davjohns

Beautiful = Messed up?

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If its in no way a sexual act then why are there simulated rapes made for purely pornographic purposes?



Probably for the same reason that there are people who are turned on by murder or other effed-up fetishes.

I could post a way-too-long description of neuroplasticity and the ill effects of pornography, but I'll refrain. Suffice it to say that too much porn can result in a seriously "messed up" mind that needs extreme stimulation to become aroused.

If you're interested, read the book The Brain that Changes Itself by Dr. Norman Doidge.
Come, my friends! 'Tis not too late to seek out a newer world!

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If its in no way a sexual act then why are there simulated rapes made for purely pornographic purposes?



Probably for the same reason that there are people who are turned on by murder or other effed-up fetishes.

I could post a way-too-long description of neuroplasticity and the ill effects of pornography, but I'll refrain. Suffice it to say that too much porn can result in a seriously "messed up" mind that needs extreme stimulation to become aroused.

If you're interested, read the book The Brain that Changes Itself by Dr. Norman Doidge.



Yes, but still the stimulation is used to achieve sexual gratification.

If rape was purely about violence and power then no one would watch videos of it to get off.
Your rights end where my feelings begin.

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If its in no way a sexual act then why are there simulated rapes made for purely pornographic purposes?



Probably for the same reason that there are people who are turned on by murder or other effed-up fetishes.

I could post a way-too-long description of neuroplasticity and the ill effects of pornography, but I'll refrain. Suffice it to say that too much porn can result in a seriously "messed up" mind that needs extreme stimulation to become aroused.

If you're interested, read the book The Brain that Changes Itself by Dr. Norman Doidge.



Yes, but still the stimulation is used to achieve sexual gratification.

If rape was purely about violence and power then no one would watch videos of it to get off.



You're confusing the commission of rape, which is about power and violence, with the watching of videos of it, which is consumption of pornography.

Of course, you're really just trolling to piss people off.

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Guys let us not go into the deep end shall we?

OK LADIES! :)Stop hiding! I know full well that almost all of you at one point or another dated a "Dude" just for looks but the guy was bat shit crazy.

What bat shit crazy actions that you overlook due to the guy being "dreamy"?

Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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Guys let us not go into the deep end shall we?

OK LADIES! :)Stop hiding! I know full well that almost all of you at one point or another dated a "Dude" just for looks but the guy was bat shit crazy.

What bat shit crazy actions that you overlook due to the guy being "dreamy"?



Probably the exact same as the men. Selfishness, narcissisim (sp?), disregard for others. The same basic belief that they are the most important person in the whole world.
I don't think the "bat shit craziness" (either being or putting up with) is much different between the sexes.
"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy

"~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo

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Probably the exact same as the men. Selfishness, narcissisim (sp?), disregard for others. The same basic belief that they are the most important person in the whole world.
I don't think the "bat shit craziness" (either being or putting up with) is much different between the sexes.


So you are saying there is a chance!
http://static.businessinsider.com/image/4a9bb478efce6f7e057f14cb/dumbanddumberjpg.jpg
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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If rape is about power and violence then why is there porn of it?

If its in no way a sexual act then why are there simulated rapes made for purely pornographic purposes?



for the reason that some people enjoy watching the power that violence shows.

a similar reaction can be seen on cop shows when the cop beats a rapist.

rape is a violent act and some people enjoy using violence for control or just to injure. not all violence and control offenses against women are done by men either.

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I'm not any kind of math expert, but here is some figuring that I did.

Considering your equation of:

Beautiful = Messed up

then

Crack whores = messed up

But seriously?

Crack whores = beautiful

This math just does not work out.

]

I think you were just joking around. "Beautiful can lead to increased liklihood of having issues" clearly does not reverse into "woman with issues is more likely to be beautiful". "All red cars are Hondas" is not the same as "all Hondas are red".
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

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I have also found that a huge percentage have been raped at some time and that has had a terrible consequence for them.



right ill bite on this

if you leave aside the fact that one rape is too much what, to you, constitutes a 'huge percentage'



Ugh. I had hoped to avoid a deep analysis of that factor. It clearly shows my sampling is biased (I hope and pray). Every above average physically attractive woman I have gotten close to has told me they were raped. I consider 100% a huge percentage. I really hope I just attract women with issues on this point.

I was really trying to keep the analysis off me and my messed up relationships. Maybe my asking the question is merely a product of that environment. But I notice other people are agreeing with the general premise.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

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I have also found that a huge percentage have been raped at some time and that has had a terrible consequence for them.



right ill bite on this

if you leave aside the fact that one rape is too much what, to you, constitutes a 'huge percentage'



Although I was offended by that statement, I chose to just ignore that. It just showed to me his lack of understanding about the truth of rape issues. He believes that only the beautiful women are raped or that it is a lust issue. Would pointing out the truth change anything? I chose to be superficial about the "not important" part of the thread.... rather than try to educate someone about something that is truly important. Right or wrong, I didn't want to have someone with minimal or no knowledge about the true trauma of rape telling me that I was wrong. Because this is the bonfire, I wanted to just keep it lighter.

But... you are right and lets go there.

Rape is an act of VIOLENCE AND POWER, not passion. It's an attempt to hurt and humiliate, using sex as the weapon. Rapists act without considering their victim's physical appearance, dress, age, race, gender, or social status. Assailants seek out victims who they perceive to be vulnerable.

If you want to learn more or even verify my statements:
List of RAPE MYTHS - Sociology of Rape. University of Minnesota Duluth



OK. Appreciate the beat down here, folks.

From my foxhole: girls who are physically attractive or develop early have increased chances to get into risky situations such as parties, places where alcohol is used, etc. They attract male attention earlier. This increases the liklihood that they will get into a situation they are not prepared for.

I only mentioned that as one potential contributing factor. I had really hoped it would not become a dominant theme of the conversation. I hate that anyone was offended by it.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

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I only mentioned that as one potential contributing factor. I had really hoped it would not become a dominant theme of the conversation. I hate that anyone was offended by it.



grand i can just about accept that and not derail the thread further

i think beautifull women probably have an equal amount of problems to everyone else the problems are just different

i had a long reply typed out but basic point was everyone has issues, just different issues, a gorgeous girl has as much chance of having issues as anyone else, imo

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for the reason that some people enjoy watching the power that violence shows.

a similar reaction can be seen on cop shows when the cop beats a rapist.

rape is a violent act and some people enjoy using violence for control or just to injure. not all violence and control offenses against women are done by men either.




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You're confusing the commission of rape, which is about power and violence, with the watching of videos of it, which is consumption of pornography.

Of course, you're really just trolling to piss people off.




So rape is only about violence, domination and power? Nothing sexual about it at all?

Then why does the availability of porn reduce the incidents of rape?

http://www.the-scientist.com/2010/3/1/29/1/

Are all forms of pornography depictions of violence and power?
Your rights end where my feelings begin.

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>If rape is about power and violence then why is there porn of it?

Because both men and women have fantasies about things that they have no intention of implementing in the real world (or allowing to happen in the real world.)

There are snuff films out there, too. Doesn't mean that murder is more a sexual crime than a violent crime.

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Here is an example.
I was dating this GORGEOUS Hungarian girl, green eyes, red hair, amazing legs....porno quality sex. Long story short she was a little nutty. She did not believe in American medication and thus had her family from Hungary sending her the usual stuff you and I take for granted.
Was it messed up? SURE! Did I forgive her? YOU BET YOUR ASS I DID!
Why? What part of gorgeous with porno quality sex don't you get?
:)



Shah, the sampling may be biased since a pre-requirement would be to be dating you ;)
Remster

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Guys let us not go into the deep end shall we?

OK LADIES! :)Stop hiding! I know full well that almost all of you at one point or another dated a "Dude" just for looks but the guy was bat shit crazy.

What bat shit crazy actions that you overlook due to the guy being "dreamy"?



None. Life is too damn short to deal with more drama in it than necessary. I don't have dramatic relationships, whether they are female friends, male friends, past boyfriends, current husband... I chose my life to be a bat-shit-crazy-free zone. If you have issues with crazy chicks, might be time to re-evaluate yourself, not the people you chose to associate with. Blaming others for the choices one makes is immature and not beneficial.

Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda

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Shah, the sampling may be biased since a pre-requirement would be to be dating you ;)


Please! I'm dead sexy! The test I took in last months Cosmo clearly indicated that! :)
Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay.

The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools!

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I only mentioned that as one potential contributing factor. I had really hoped it would not become a dominant theme of the conversation. I hate that anyone was offended by it.



I honestly did understand your ignorance - and I'm NOT saying that as an insult or a personal attack, rather that you most likely have less personal and professional knowledge / experience with the topic of rape. Personal experience aside, my professional careers have included being a labor and delivery/ER nurse and then as an OB/Gyn physician. With that background, I have a different perspective.

At first, I didn't want to "attack" you for that comment. It's understandable to try to find a reason why the women that you've been with have been "messed up" AND rape would be a significant confounding variable. But I just didn't want to continue the quiet consent of that as a "excuse." Studies have shown that 1:6 women have been raped (and even as frequent as 1:3 have experienced sexual assault/molestation at some point) But it's not just the "beautiful" ones. You have just had a biased sample set. (if you've found that a "huge percentage" of the beautiful women that you have dated have been raped) Also, just because a female has had a bad experience in her past doesn't guarantee that she will be "messed up."

But, back to your experience, part of your sample bias might be where you are meeting these women. Another part might be how you are presenting yourself to them. If you are projecting yourself in a role as a "protector" or a "saver", then yes, you will seem to attract more women that WANT to be protected and saved. And the women that prefer to take care of themselves will naturally select themselves out of that population. Maybe you find that less independent female to be more "beautiful."

I might be off base on this, but I would recommend that if you want less of that co-dependant type relationship, my first suggestion would be to examine how you interact with women. I'm not saying "don't be a gentleman." Rather, don't try to fix her world. Don't encourage her to be dependent. Try to establish more of an equal relationship.

and... as a side note:

if you want to role play, as several have pointed out that "rape fantasy" can be "normal" fetish... make sure you have and respect what ever safe word you and her establish.

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I think the 1:6 is not factual

More like 1:4 and 1:2 for just molested or assaulted.



Those are the stats that are frequently quoted:

However, if you look closely at the study that quote the numbers that high, you will see some errors with the study.

Rape Statistics: 1 in 4?

But even that review has it's bias and I don't think their 1:14 is correct either.

I got my numbers from National Institute of Justice Centers for Disease Control and Prevention On page 2

Quote

Using a definition of rape that includes forced vaginal, oral, and anal intercourse, the survey found that rape is a crime com- mitted primarily against youth: 18 percent of women surveyed said they experienced a completed or attempted rape at some time in their life



Admittedly: I did take some liberty in the numbers though. I converted the 18% (which most people don't like to think about numbers like that - "18% - what does that mean?") to a "1 in x" The x was actually 5.555555555555555, but I chose to round it up to 1:6.

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Thanks for your thoughts. I am a former police officer and helped my former wife run a rape counseling program. I'm familiar with the problem.

Again, I wasn't looking for an analysis of my personal relationships on this. It was a general theory and I was wondering if others had noticed the same thing.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

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